London Rain
by GoldSovereign
Summary: A Sue Ellen, J.R., and John Ross encounter somewhere between the series end in 1991 and J.R. Returns in 1996.
1. Part 1

_Started: November 14, 2004  
Completed: January 3, 2007  
Revised and Reposted: November 16, 2007_

_Thanks to everyone from the UD Writer's Room for the support and encouragement that turned a little four-page idea into this story._

LONDON RAIN, Part 1

_So every day I see you in some other face  
They crack a smile, talk a while  
Try to take your place  
My memory serves me far too well   
---George Michael, "Waiting For The Day"_

Omnia Omnibus Ubique: All Things, For All People, Everywhere.

That was Harrods motto and one of the reasons Sue Ellen Lockwood loved shopping there. From a table in the Caffé Espresso near the Fruit and Vegetable Food Hall, she surveyed the crowd of holiday shoppers hurrying by. Accents from different countries floated through the air and the exotic array of dress customs blended beautifully with the colorful displays of fruits and holiday decorations, making the whole scene very charming.

As with each visit to the store, Sue Ellen secretly hoped to spot an American in the crowd. After several years of living in London, she savored any reminder of home especially on days she was feeling homesick, particularly during the holidays.

She shook her head and smiled, gently chastising herself. London was her home now and she was happy there. Don, her very British husband, had eased her transition from Dallas to London, helping her assimilate many of the quirks of British culture. It made living in the sprawling city much easier. But there were things she still missed about America. She missed Texas most of all. What was that old saying of Jock Ewing's ... _"you could take the Texan outta' Texas, but Texas stayed in your blood for good."_

The recollection made her softly giggle. Jock Ewing. How she still missed that man, along with his wife, Miss Ellie. Even as terrified as she had been of them when she first went to live at Southfork, they ended up being more like her parents than her real parents were. And she loved them both dearly. Too bad they had raised such a rotten son.

A mischievous, playful expression flickered across her face at the thought of her ex-husband. J.R. was without a doubt the most infuriating person she had ever encountered. He had an uncanny way of knowing just how to manipulate her, both in love and anger, and had even nearly destroyed her life on several occasions. Yet without his influence she wouldn't be where she was today … happily married and running several successful business ventures.

A therapist long ago, during the days she fought her alcoholism, had explained she could either be pathetic or powerful. After years of J.R.'s abuse, Sue Ellen had finally chosen powerful, learning how to do just that from than the master himself.

Power was an essential part of J.R.'s life, just like breathing, and he wielded it like a weapon. Sue Ellen had secretly studied him, observing the ways he maneuvered and manipulated situations in his favor then turned his own tactics against him. She ended up besting him several times and the heady feel of holding even a small amount of power over him finally let her understand him, probably better than anyone else ever had. The only difference was she had been able to walk away from it all when she had her revenge and her quiet life in London now seemed that much sweeter because of it.

Oh, but when they did battle, it had been some of the most exciting, daring moments of her life. Moments her mamma had always said real ladies never engaged in. Mamma didn't know what she was missing.

As her thoughts continued to drift though memories of the past, she looked out once more across the sea of shoppers. At a distance, as if conjured up out of her daydreams, her heart involuntarily leapt when she could just make out a rarity in London: the familiar shape of a cowboy hat. She blinked several times. Perhaps she had just wished she had seen it. Yet when she looked again, it was still there ... and coming closer.

It was an excellent hat, obviously high quality, the crisp brim and peak made of an elegant mist grey felt set off by a discreet band of matching silk. Sue Ellen unconsciously smiled as she wondered what kind of man would wear a hat like that in London. It couldn't be someone aspiring to the western look. No, that hat was the subtle kind only an American born and raised in the southwest would choose. Judging by the quality, probably someone with money.

Intrigued, she sat back in her chair and sipped her coffee, hoping the owner would continue to walk in her direction. Then she caught a brief glimpse of the owner's face and began to cough violently, nearly choking on the coffee she had just swallowed. She sat the cup down and tried to clear her throat as she desperately looked around, searching for any possible escape route. There was none. She would either have to sit there and pray she wouldn't be noticed or go to the cashier and hope to enter the crowd of people before the owner of the hat approached the café.

Sue Ellen stood up and darted toward the cashier then proceeded to drop the contents of her purse on the floor. As she ducked down to stuff the contents back into the leather bag, she tried desperately to control the tremble of her hands. How could she have been so stupid? How could she have just assumed the owner of the cowboy hat wasn't J.R.? Had she been away from him and Dallas for so long that the hard-won defenses she had erected against him over the years disappeared? And why was he in London? Another alarm sounded in her head … he was there to take John Ross home.

She had to get out of Harrods as soon as possible.

The remaining items were quickly collected off the floor and put back in her purse then she went to the cashier, not daring to look back.

"Keep the change," she said as she handed the cashier her check and a ten-pound note.

"Thank you, madam," the girl replied with a bright smile and looked over Sue Ellen's shoulder to her next customer. "I'll be right with you, sir."

Sue Ellen swiftly turned but only succeeded in running squarely into the chest of the waiting customer. They both stumbled back a few steps before he steadied her by placing his hands on her upper arms. Startled by both the proximity of the tall, strong stranger and embarrassed by her own clumsiness, Sue Ellen looked up into the bluest, most unwelcomingly familiar eyes.

"Hello, darlin'," came the soft, smooth drawl.


	2. Part 2

LONDON RAIN, Part 2 

Overwhelmed and off-balance, Sue Ellen suddenly felt dizzy. It was more than just seeing him again. Hearing her ex-husband's voice had sent a tingle of dread down her spine that combined with the electricity she had always felt being so near him, particularly when he touched her.

"You feelin' all right?" J.R. asked when she didn't respond. "C'mon ... let's sit down here for a minute."

The cashier motioned to the table Sue Ellen had just left and J.R. guided her to a chair. Her movements were stilted, near robotic, as she allowed him to lead her to the table. She couldn't think or feel anything. It was if she were encased in ice.

"Could I get a glass of water for the lady?" J.R. said to the cashier without looking away.

"Of course, sir," the girl replied. "I'll bring it right out."

Left alone at the table, J.R. reached over and took hold of Sue Ellen's hand. It was ice cold. There was an honest concern etched in his frown as he studied Sue Ellen.

"Honey, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to startle you like that. I was just hopin' I could reach you before you disappeared into the crowd."

The touch of his hand on hers both warmed and revolted her, bringing her back to her senses. She gingerly snapped it back out of his reach.

"I had every intention of disappearing into the crowd," came her angry response. "What the hell are you doing in London, J.R.?"

"Now that's my Sue Ellen." J.R. said as he sat back and slowly grinned. The concern in his expression melted into the sarcastic, to-hell-with-everything smirk that she knew all too well.

"I am not your Sue Ellen!" She snapped back, her anger doubled by the familiarity of his tone. "If you're here to take John Ross back with you, you can bloody well forget it!"

The British curse word and the strength with which it was thrown made several customers look in their direction. Startled, the young cashier who had just returned with the glass of water froze at the edge of the table. J.R. looked around the café, keenly aware of the unwanted attention, then up at the cashier and took the glass of water.

"Thank you, darlin'," he said to the young girl, using the charm he had always relied on to smooth out any uncomfortable situation. "We'll order in a minute."

The girl nodded and quickly returned to her post at the cash register.

"You order all you want," Sue Ellen replied as she quickly stood up. "I'm leaving."

"Sue Ellen ... please." J.R. softly requested as he reached over and gently grabbed her arm. "I swear on my daddy's grave this is all a coincidence." J.R. didn't believe in any religion that Sue Ellen knew of but the love and respect he had for his father was reverential. When she stopped, J.R. continued. "Just sit down here and talk to me. I'd give anything to hear a genuine Texas drawl."

Honesty wasn't one of J.R.'s better qualities but when he was honest, Sue Ellen knew it, almost instinctively … like now. She cautiously sat down again and looked over at him, studying him, trying to find any malice in his motives.

"All right," she cautiously agreed. "But first you'll answer my question ... honestly answer my question … or I'm leaving."

Her demand made J.R. chuckle. There were only two people in the entire world that could spot a lie on him ... his mamma and the lady sitting in front of him. They both knew him too well.

"What am I doin' in London?" He casually shrugged his shoulders. "Hell, I don't know. It's just another stop on my travels."

"I find that hard to believe since John Ross and I are here," Sue Ellen said coldly.

"Yeah, I know. I was wonderin' about stoppin' in to see you." He suddenly changed the subject. "Then I mentioned to the concierge at my hotel I'd love a steak. He said I might find some American cookin' in the Food Halls of Harrods. So, here I am." He stopped and slowly grinned at Sue Ellen, who resented the havoc it played on the nerves in her stomach. "I couldn't believe it when I looked over and saw you. I thought my ol' eyes were playin' tricks on me." He paused briefly and a look of sadness flickered in his eyes. "I know I should have just let you be, pretended like I didn't see you, but I couldn't resist."

Sue Ellen was bewildered both at the residual shock from seeing him and the complete absence of malice in his disposition. She felt no threat from him and couldn't grasp why.

"When I spotted you," she softly replied, "I wanted to get the hell away from here as fast as I could."

J.R.'s laughter was unexpected yet even as it faded, the amusement lingered on his lips, becoming a rare, honest smile that graced his expression. It was something that happened all too infrequently during their time together. When he did smile, though, Sue Ellen had always been taken with how beautiful it was. Even now.

"I can't say as I blame you," J.R. agreed, "considerin' our last conversation was nothin' but threats, if I recall correctly."

"You do."

J.R. laughed again as he reached up to remove his Stetson with an effortless tip of the front brim. He placed it upside down in the chair next to him and ran long fingers over locks of hair he knew the hat had disturbed.

Sue Ellen closely watched him, still searching for any hint of treachery, but also taking the opportunity to survey his features. There were subtle differences since she had seen him last … a few more lines around his mouth and his quicksilver blue eyes which were now elegantly set off by the additional silver in his thinning hair. He was still devastatingly attractive. Damn him. Age had given him a very distinguished look, making him look almost ... respectable. She suppressed the urge to laugh. He would never be respectable, especially if he flashed one of those irresistibly devious grins and removed all doubt.

As if reading her mind, J.R. gave her a slow, broad grin. "If it makes you feel any better, honey, this past year has really whupped my ass."

Hearing him admit to it was what really made her feel better and she suddenly felt a competitive impulse to flirt with him. It was one of the ways she had discovered to keep him off balance. One of the tricks he had taught her.

"Well, then please tell me all about it," she slowly drawled with just a hint of a sly smile. "And don't spare any of the details."

J.R. sat and admired her for several moments. The lady still knew exactly what buttons to push. Out of all the women he knew, she was the only one who could play his game ... and play it well. It certainly didn't hurt she was also one of the most beautiful women he had ever encountered. Whether it was her well-bred genetics or the strict, simple skin care regimen she had followed since he'd known her, she had defied natural aging and maturity now accentuated her looks. Hell, she was better looking now than the day he'd met her all those years ago. Her hair was still dark brown, the way it had been the day she left him standing in that theatre in Dallas. But instead of the long, dramatic cut he remembered, it was now cropped in a shaggy, windswept style that accented her big, beautiful eyes. And they were as mysterious as ever, holding so much emotion that the dark hazel was often mistaken for brown.

"Seems like everyone has been gunnin' for me lately," J.R. finally answered, "or just flat out leavin' me. Even John Ross couldn't stand bein' around me and came over here to you." Sue Ellen said nothing, purposefully keeping their son out of the conversation. "And Cliff Barnes, of all people, is runnin' Ewing Oil." J.R. looked sharply at his ex-wife, secretly startling her, but she held his gaze. "You'd even be proud of that old rodeo has-been of yours, Dusty Farlow. He and Carter McKay beat me outta West Star Oil. Just like you did."

Sue Ellen remained silent, simply continuing to hold his gaze.

J.R. studied her, puzzled that she hadn't vocally rejoiced in his downfall or fought back against the crack about Dusty. Actually, she hadn't reacted in any way, keeping her feelings cloaked behind those deep, dark eyes and it unnerved him.

"What, Sue Ellen … no gloating?" He added. "I thought you, of all people, would be thrilled at the news of my premature demise."

"No," Sue Ellen quietly replied. "Getting the best of you is no longer the driving force in my life. But now I know what's different about you. I haven't been able to put my finger on it until just now."

"What are you talkin' about?"

"The mantle of power. You used to wear it like suit of armor. Now it's gone."

The honest, insightful comment surprised J.R. She didn't want a fight and he suddenly realized he had been trying to bait her. He had no idea why. She was no longer a threat to him. She hadn't been in quite some time. But she hadn't taken his bait and he was relieved now she didn't.

"You're right," he sighed. "I've got nothin' ... nothin' at all. Ol' Lady Luck has deserted me, honey. I couldn't even shoot myself without screwin' it up."

"Shoot yourself?" Sue Ellen already knew almost everything he had told her. She had kept tabs on him through mutual friends and the occasional story in the business news. She had even reveled in some of the more unpleasant things J.R. had been going through. It seemed like justice had finally been served. But the thought of him attempting to kill himself was unexpected.

"Yeah," J.R. nodded without the usual sparkle in his eyes. "Ain't that the damndest thing you've ever heard? All I did was end up shootin' the mirror in my bedroom and scarin' poor Bobby half to death. So that night, I just packed up a suitcase and got on the first plane headed to the farthest place from Dallas. Just so happened it was Paris. I've been there ever since."

Paris. It alarmed Sue Ellen to know he was now so close, had been there for what sounded like quite some time. Yet if he was going to make a move against her, he would have done it by now.

"I can't picture you in Paris, J.R." She remarked.

"Yeah, I know. It ain't my most favorite place in the whole world. But they don't know me or give a damn who I am over there. I kinda' like it that way."

Sue Ellen sat back and folded her arms across her chest, marveling at everything she had just heard. "You certainly are full of surprises, aren't you?"

J.R. considered her comment then couldn't help but smile and nodded. Once it was verbalized, his whole situation, including sitting there talking it over with his ex-wife, did seem rather funny.

"Have a cup of coffee with me, Sue Ellen. Just for old times sake."

Sue Ellen hesitated then sighed at the conflict he could still stir up inside of her. "I shouldn't," she said as a smile gradually warmed her expression, "but I will."

With that, J.R. motioned to a nearby waiter while giving Sue Ellen another warm, beautiful smile that momentarily took her breath away.


	3. Part 3

LONDON RAIN, Part 3 

J.R. took another sip of coffee and smiled. "Damn, it's good to taste American coffee again. I can tolerate the European stuff they serve in the hotels but I surely don't enjoy it."

"Give it time," Sue Ellen replied. "I had the same problem when I first got here but it's not so bad now. Plus I found this place," she added, motioning to their surroundings. "It gives me just a touch of home when I need it. Besides, I never know when I'll run into another American here let alone a Texan."

"You can run into me anytime, honey." There was a roguish blue twinkle in his eyes and the double meaning of the comment was not lost of Sue Ellen.

She sipped her coffee, eyeing him over the top of the cup. It felt like each passing minute she spent with him destroyed another part of her distrust of him. There was just something so different about the man in front of her compared to the lying, cheating, ruthless bastard she had left back in Dallas and vowed to hate for the rest of her life.

Now, slight stirrings of attraction kept zinging through her when he smiled a certain way or because of something he said. She never had been able to douse her physical attraction to J.R., no matter how much verbal damage they had inflicted on each other. It seemed like the sexual chemistry between them refused to die even though their love for each other had been killed off long ago.

The mixture of emotions that danced across her expressive face intrigued J.R. He cocked his head to the side, perplexed by what she might be thinking.

"You all right, Sue Ellen?"

"Yes, I'm fine," she said, trying to deflect his attention with her best smile. She mentally searched for a neutral subject to discuss with him then decided to deal with what she had wondered about since they first started talking. "Since it's almost Christmas, would you like to see John Ross while you're here?"

J.R. considered the offer then shook his head. "No, I don't think I better. Not 'til I'm back on my feet."

"J.R., your son doesn't care if you run an oil company or a taco stand."

"I know," he replied sheepishly to the straightforward comment. "But it matters to me."

"Can I offer you some advice?"

Her offer surprised him. "Of course you can, honey … you're one of the few people who can."

Sue Ellen wasn't swayed by his charm, not when they were discussing John Ross. For the past few months, she had watched their son quietly suffer without the presence of his father and she wouldn't let this opportunity pass.

"Don't let your ego or anything else keep you from John Ross. He's extremely perceptive and the more you distance yourself from him, the more difficult it will be to win him back."

"I know, I know," J.R. replied and nodded his head for emphasis. Her words echoed similar thoughts that had haunted him since John Ross left Southfork. "I'll call him as soon as I get back to Paris tomorrow, I promise."

"Oh? You leaving London so soon?" She tried to sound casual but had a feeling the anxiety knotted in her stomach showed in her voice.

"Yes. Think maybe after the holidays he'd like to come over and spend some time with me?"

"I know he would. He loves Paris."

"He does?" J.R. wondered aloud. "You been takin' him over there?"

"We've been there several times. He's learning French in school and, of course, I'm always looking for an excuse to go shopping."

"Yes, you are," he grinned, relieved to be discussing something lighter once again. "How's the boy doin' in school?"

"Very well," she replied proudly. "His grades are excellent and his teachers all think he's brilliant. Now if I could just get the girls to stop calling him on the phone."

J.R. chuckled. "Well, what do you expect with his daddy's brains and mamma's looks?"

"Hmmm, I always thought he had his mamma's looks and brains."

"You have a point there," J.R. easily conceded to her playful sarcasm. "But I hope he got somethin' from me … didn't he?"

"He did," Sue Ellen nodded. "His bright blue eyes, devilish smile and non-stop charm."

J.R. laughed out loud. "That's my boy!"

"Plus a stubborn streak that won't quit and a mean temper when provoked."

"Oh ... that." His jubilant expression fell until he noticed Sue Ellen trying to suppress a smile. "Well, I guess he's more like his mamma after all."

Sue Ellen finally released the laugh she was withholding. It amused her how easily they had fallen back into the verbal fencing match they had once excelled at. Only now it was done without spite or anger and she enjoyed it so much more.

"Come to Paris with him, Sue Ellen," J.R. said, the sound of her laughter warming his soul. It was a sensation he hadn't felt in years and suddenly missed desperately. "Let's show him his mamma and daddy really do know how to behave themselves and be nice to each other."

It was a sweet offer and she couldn't help but smile. "I'll have to think about that."

J.R. said nothing yet Sue Ellen knew she held his complete attention. She actually enjoyed the feeling and marveled at the sudden desire to spend the rest of the afternoon here with him, sipping coffee and talking. The rest of the afternoon, she thought. Startled by the sudden realization of how much time had passed, Sue Ellen looked at her watch.

"Oh, damn it! I'm gonna be late."

Her sudden withdrawal confused J.R. "For what?"

"I promised John Ross I would pick him up from school today." She swiftly stood up and reached for her coat and bag then turned to J.R., ready to make a quick, painless goodbye. He sat silently drinking his coffee, absently looking away from her, for once in his life at a loss for something to say. Sue Ellen suddenly realized she didn't want to say goodbye. Not like this, not just yet. "Say ... how 'bout walkin' me to the door, J.R.?"

J.R. had been disappointed that her Texas accent had faded a little during her time in London so the hometown inflection she had involuntarily spun on her last sentence was a delight to hear. He nearly slammed the coffee cup down.

"Yes, ma'am! Lead the way."

With that, he helped her with her coat and paid the cashier, then followed her to the exit at the back of the Fruit and Vegetable Food Hall. He made a mental note that as soon as he got back to the hotel, he would give the concierge a healthy tip for the information about Harrods.

As they approached the outside door, Sue Ellen noticed it had started raining.

"Oh, wonderful," she said gloomily. "It's impossible to catch a cab in this part of London when it rains."

"Well, c'mon back to my hotel with me," J.R. replied. Sue Ellen shot him a suspicious look. "I can arrange for you to take the hotel limo where you're goin', that's all." She still hesitated. "C'mon, it's not far. It's just the Lanesborough, right down the street. And I promise, I'll be a gentleman."

"J.R., you are many things ... a gentleman isn't one of them."

He grinned. "Then you'll just have to trust me, wont'cha?"

Sue Ellen looked outside at the bleak weather then back at J.R. He was the proverbial "lesser of two evils". However, the Lanesborough truly wasn't very far away and a ride in a limousine would be a nice change. She hadn't been in one since she left Dallas.

"You sure you want to venture out in this?" She asked as she locked the umbrella into place.

"Darlin', you've been away from Texas too long," J.R. said as he placed his cowboy hat squarely on his head. "It isn't called rain there unless a drop knocks you unconscious."

Sue Ellen laughed, recalling some of the Texas hurricanes she had be in. It also amused her that the older J.R. got the more he sounded like his father.

The Harrods doorman dutifully opened the door for them and they stepped out into the cold, wet weather. Sue Ellen raised her umbrella to fend off the rain. She knew it would do no good to offer J.R. half the protection of the umbrella. He was a firm believer in the Texas folklore that a Stetson could fend off any kind of storm.

"So, you're staying at The Lanesborough," Sue Ellen said as they started walking and slipped her hand through the crook of J.R.'s arm.

"It's the best in London," J.R. grinned proudly, wishing he didn't have the heavy overcoat on so he could feel her touch.

"You obviously haven't lost all your money," she teased.

"Not as long as the Swiss have banks to hide it in. Besides, losin' Ewing Oil money was a whole lot easier than losin' J.R. Ewing's money."

"Now, refresh my memory. Isn't that called embezzling?" She teased.

"Well, I hope I don't tarnish that low opinion you have of me, Sue Ellen, but I really do have my own money." He dropped the pretend defensive stance and looked over at her. "How come you didn't ask for any of it when you divorced me the second time?"

Sue Ellen shrugged. "I didn't want it or need it. I have enough of my own."

Her casual comment generated an intense curiosity in J.R. "Exactly how much are you worth?"

"A hell of a lot more than you."

"What makes you so sure?"

"Nothing. I just like besting you."

J.R. burst into laughter. It was rare when getting beaten by someone felt so good. "Well, hell … maybe I should'a asked the judge for some of yours then."

Sue Ellen glanced over at him and smiled. His laughter had momentarily banished the intangible darkness she had sensed around him. Plus being the one who made him laugh was unexpectedly satisfying.

"I really did let you off easy," she remarked. "Too damn easy, now that I think about it."

"You surely did." J.R. nodded.

She continued to observe him. Rain dripped off the brim of his Stetson, down to the expensive cashmere of his beautifully tailored, western-cut overcoat. His taste in some things was questionable, especially where women were concerned, but he did have exquisite taste in suits. They were always perfectly matched to his tall, broad-shouldered build by the talented tailor he had gone to for years.

J.R. felt her gaze and looked over at her. Her lips curved sensuously into a familiar half-smile then she looked away.

"What?" He questioned.

Sue Ellen innocently looked back at him. "What ... what?"

"What were you thinkin' just now, when you were lookin' at me?"

"You are a bit of an attraction in this city." She smiled at her own quick thinking but wished she had chosen a different word.

"An attraction?" J.R. picked up on it without hesitation.

"Mmm-hmm," Sue Ellen casually answered as she looked over the crowds of people both coming and going before them. "Haven't you noticed the looks you've been receiving? The British rarely see a genuine cowboy walking down the street."

"A cowboy?" J.R. snorted indignantly. "Hell darlin', Ray Krebbs is a cowboy. I'm an oilman. There's a big difference." Sue Ellen grinned both at his annoyance and the rich drawl he inflected on "oilman." Then his voice became distant, almost wistful. "Well ... at least I was an oilman."

It was one of those rare times he dropped the massive gate of overblown confidence to let genuine human emotion through … times when Sue Ellen always found him at his most appealing. She quickly diverted the conversation.

"These people don't know the difference. That Stetson gives you away."

"Huh," came his only audible response as he looked at the rain-soaked faces around him. His eyes fell on the marquee of a movie theater across the street and he pointed to it. "You still in the movie business?"

Sue Ellen looked over at him, a guarded look of amusement in her expression. He could care less about the movie business and she knew it. His sole interest was in one movie, the version of their life together she had filmed then blackmailed him with.

"No, I turned it over to my husband when I got here. He's the professional filmmaker. But I still have a few properties, a few items of interest I held on to. Some stories you just can't let go of."

Irritated, J.R. quickly cut through the double-talk. "Are you ever gonna burn that piece of trash you called a film, Sue Ellen? Or are you just gonna hold it over my head the rest of my life?"

Sue Ellen grinned at him, briefly tightening the grip on his arm. "Oh, come on, J.R. Didn't you enjoy seeing yourself up on the big screen? I thought it would have been a tremendous boost to your ego."

"A two-bit actor puttin' words in my mouth from a fictional script is no boost to my ego."

"Well darlin', you must not have heard about the fire at my film vault," Sue Ellen quickly remarked, not wanting to push him too far. Besides, she knew it was time to let go. "It was a very selective fire. Seems it destroyed only one film and it's negative." J.R. looked over at her and she nodded. "It's gone," she softly remarked and looked away from him. "I watched it a few months ago and realized I didn't want there to be even the slightest chance our son would see it. Or Miss Ellie."

"Thank you, Sue Ellen," J.R. quietly replied after a moment then couldn't help but smile. "I've gotta tell you, that was one of the best plots ever hatched against this ol' boy. I mean, I'd thought I'd seen it all but that film of yours was just flat out devious. You really had me."

"Yes, I did," she arrogantly replied

She sounded so much like him then it made J.R. smile again. "You're pretty damn lethal, the way you know me and my methods. Hope you never come after me again."

"Hope you never give me reason to," Sue Ellen smugly replied.

J.R. secretly marveled at his ex-wife. She had become one of his most formidable foes because he had given her no other choice. Yet it wasn't intimidating. He found it exciting and sexy as hell.

"Sue Ellen, how 'bout joinin' up with me, becomin' my business partner? We could set Europe on its ear, workin' together."

"Us … business partners?" Sue Ellen repeated, making sure she had heard correctly. "Not a chance."

"Well, at least think about it," J.R. said, rather disappointed by her quick reply.

"There's nothing to think about, J.R. The only reason we're having this conversation, the only reason we're even walking down this street side by side is because we've been apart so long. No, if we want to continue being civil to each other, the more distance between us, the better."

"Too bad," he replied, honestly disappointed. "We'd make one hell of a team."

"Not a chance," Sue Ellen repeated with a smile.

J.R. softly laughed then they both fell into easy, friendly silence and continued walking.


	4. Part 4

LONDON RAIN, Part 4 

As they approached, Sue Ellen glanced up at the imposing façade of the Lanesborough Hotel. Even though she had never stayed there she had visited the restaurant several times and enjoyed it. The building was a magnificent monument to Victorian architecture yet employed modern amenities in elegant yet inviting regency-style rooms serviced by a staff that ranked alongside those serving at Buckingham Palace. It was no wonder both celebrities and international businessmen enjoyed staying there … including a certain ex-oilman.

The doorman spotted J.R. and quickly approached with an umbrella. "Good afternoon, Mr. Ewing."

J.R. nodded once then withdrew a fifty-pound note from his pocket and gave it to the man. "I'd like the limousine brought around for Mrs. Ewing, please."

"Who, darlin'?" Sue Ellen politely interrupted as she playfully tugged on his arm.

"All right," he acquiesced as he looked over at her, "Mrs. Lockwood." He nearly bit off the end of her new last name.

"That's better," she replied with a victorious grin.

"Of course, sir," the doorman pleasantly replied. "It will take just a moment. Would you like to step inside and wait?"

"No, thank you," Sue Ellen quickly answered. "We'll wait here."

J.R. gave her a disapproving frown, unhappy she didn't trust him enough to accompany him inside the building to get out of the rain. Then again, once they were inside it would be difficult not to invite her up to his suite.

"Like the lady said," J.R. remarked as he looked back at the doorman, "we'll wait here."

"Very good, sir ... madam." The doorman tipped his hat and hurried off through the hotel door.

Sue Ellen moved to the wall of the building, seeking what little shelter it offered from the rain. J.R. stood still, taking the opportunity to watch her move with the fluid, feminine grace he had always admired. When she turned, she looked radiant, framed by the royal blue background of her umbrella that made her stand out from the dull grey surroundings of rain-soaked London. He began to walk over to her when a young man running for a bus bumped into him.

"Sorry, mate," the teenager called out then disappeared into the maze of cars and people.

J.R. indignantly brushed off his coat and continued on.

"You all right?" Sue Ellen asked when he stopped in front of her.

"How in the hell does a former Miss Texas stand this city?" He remarked, clearly irritated. "Don't you miss the warm, blue Texas skies? The open country? The cattle grazin' out in the field?"

"And a laurel wreath of yellow roses in my hair?"

J.R. scoffed at the sarcastic tone in her voice. "C'mon, you know what I'm talkin' about."

"Honestly, J.R., I like it here in London." She paused and thought back about the state she was born and raised in. "But yes, I do miss Texas. There is no place like it in the world."

"Damn straight."

She couldn't help but smile. There was the Ewing arrogance she expected from him. "Sounds like you miss it, too."

He looked at her and nodded. "Yes, ma'am. And I can't for the life of me understand why you had to move here."

"Are you serious?" There was a flicker of anger in her voice but J.R. wouldn't be deterred.

"Hell yes, I'm serious!" The strength of his inflection drew looks from several passing people. "Whatever possessed you to leave Dallas for this place?"

"Well, considering the fact that I fell in love with and married a man who lived in London ..."

"Do you have to keep bringin' him up?" J.R. interrupted, irritated at yet another reminder she was married to another man.

"All right, then how about if we talk about the child bride you married before the ink was even dry on our divorce?"

"Cally was not a child," J.R. replied defensively.

"Well, Vanessa Beaumont certainly wasn't, either. But that didn't stop you from attempting to play house with her and her bastard son, did it?"

J.R. had no defense or excuse. She was right. And the bitterness in her voice was even colder than the rain.

"Where did you hear about Vanessa?" J.R. quietly asked. Sue Ellen looked away from him, deliberately ignoring his question. "Is that why you stayed in London instead of comin' home? You didn't want to see me married and havin' a family with another woman?"

Frustrated, Sue Ellen finally lost control of all the emotions that were surfacing inside her. "You egotistical bastard! The only thing my being here has to do with you was I wanted to find some peace and quiet as far away from you as possible!"

"Then why the hell did you go and marry Lockwood?"

"Why, J.R.? Didn't you want to see me married to another man?"

Sue Ellen had deliberately twisted his own words and flung them back at him, hoping they would dig in and shut him up. Her plan worked … he was silenced. But she hadn't counted on his reaction.

J.R. gently reached out and touched her cheek, tracing his finger under her jawbone before tipping her chin up. Stunned by the heat his touched invoked, Sue Ellen didn't have time to react before he bent down and kissed her, lightly at first, gradually drawing her in until she responded.

The cold of the rain and fog melted away as the passion between them reignited and intensified. But it wasn't enough. J.R. longed to feel her body against his just one more time. As he shifted to move his hands around her waist, Sue Ellen pushed against his chest, breaking the kiss.

"No … not this time, darlin'," Sue Ellen quietly resisted, a razor-sharp edge in her voice. "Never again."

"Never is a long time, honey," he slowly drawled as he admired the curve of her lower lip.

"Then let's just chalk it up to our incompatibility and be happy there is a ocean between us. Or at least the English Channel."

J.R. looked directly into her eyes and Sue Ellen felt her breath catch at the intensity of his gaze.

"There shouldn't be anything between us but the sheets of my bed."

The boldness of the proposition and the way it quickened her already racing heartbeat astounded her, the shock registering in her expression.

"Oh, don't look at me like that," J.R. said with a mischievous smile. "We've been many things to each other, most of 'em downright nasty, but we never, ever had a problem in bed."

His drawl was low and seductive and had lost none of its effectiveness. She actually felt more drawn to him than she had ever been. But she wouldn't give in to him. Not now. Not ever again. She doubled her grip on the umbrella then disdainfully raised an eyebrow.

"Too bad I was never, ever enough for you."

"Oh, you were more than enough for me. You are the one woman I can't get outta my system. Hell, I'd take you up to my hotel suite right now if you'd let me."

Sue Ellen laughed out loud and enjoyed the surprised look on his face at her unexpected reaction.

"J.R., when are you ever gonna learn that the resolution to most situations is not horizontal."

Puzzled, J.R. looked at her for a moment then slowly grinned as he comprehended her meaning. "It sure would be a nice way to spend a rainy afternoon."

"Well," she grinned sarcastically, "how refreshing to know that even without Ewing Oil, you still have a one-track mind."

"Does that mean you're tempted?" His smile was wicked.

"Not even remotely."

"Damn, woman," he breathed in a slow, deep drawl, stepping back to admire her. "I honestly don't know what there is about you that makes me forget all reason and only think about how I can get you in bed. I mean, we should hate each other for life or longer after the things we've done. But Miss Texas has turned into quite an accomplished lady. And I'm proud of you. Damn proud."

The approval and sincerity of his comment was unexpectedly gratifying but she refused to show any reaction to it.

"You still have the worst timing, J.R.," she replied with a mock irritation. "I mean, picking the middle of a crowded street in a rain storm to tell me something like that."

"Well hell, darlin', I can hardly believe I said it myself." He looked over at her and his sarcastic grin faded away. "But I mean it, Sue Ellen."

"I know you do. And it scares me."

"You don't have to be scared of me, honey," he said with a rare gentleness. "I know you're happily married. And I meant no harm by what I said or by kissin' you. It's just that it's been good to be able to talk to you again ... tell you things I should have told you years ago. Maybe it's 'cause I don't have anything else to offer you right now."

"Oh, I don't know. I'm expecting any moment now you'll come up with one of your usual schemes or crazy plots for revenge and boost yourself to the top once more."

"I don't know about that. I'm not even sure I have it in me." J.R. sighed, revealing a mental weariness that surprised Sue Ellen. "I just drift from city to city, hotel to hotel, hopin' I'll stumble across somethin' that will get me goin' again." Then he looked at her and grinned, the wicked sparkle returning to his eyes. "At least London has been a bright spot."

The hotel doorman delicately approached the couple. "Mr. Ewing, the car is just approaching, sir."

Both Sue Ellen and J.R. looked over to see the long black limousine slowly splashing to a stop in front of them. They followed the doorman over to the car and as he took a step to open the door, J.R. reached out to stop him.

"I'll take care of this, thank you."

"Very good, sir," the doorman acknowledged as he faded back to the hotel door. He was very familiar with the etiquette required when dealing with the farewells of people in love, especially long-time lovers. After the expressions he had covertly noted from the couple in front of him during the past few moments, he had no doubt of the passionate past they shared.

Sue Ellen watched as J.R. took a few steps in front of her and opened the limousine door. She approached the open door then stopped and turned to him.

"J.R., I know I'm in no position to ask you for a favor ..."

"You can ask me for anything, darlin'," he happily replied.

"You've got to stay out of London," she said, the concern in her voice palpable. "We can't ever meet like this again. I don't trust you. And I don't trust me when I'm around you."

She struggled with the words but J.R. knew exactly what she was saying. The heat of the kiss they had shared still tingled on his lips. A wave of desire ran through him like he had never experienced. He wanted to be with this woman - protect her, spoil her, love her, make love to her - for however long she would allow him to be near to her. Then the cold reality hit him that she belonged to someone else who probably did those very things for her.

"I know," J.R. nodded as he repressed a chill. "And I promise, I'll stay outta London. But I need a favor in return." He reached into the breast pocket of his suit and pulled out his wallet then removed a business card. "You call me," he said as he handed her the card, "if you or John Ross need anything. Anything at all."

Sue Ellen took the card and looked at it. Plain black letters stood out on brilliant white card, revealing only a Paris street address and a phone number. Then she looked up at the man it identified.

"Why so mysterious, J.R.?"

"I'm feelin' a little too vulnerable right now so just keep that info between you and me, huh?" A look of alarm sparked in Sue Ellen's expression but J.R. gave her a reassuring grin. "If anyone asks, just tell them what a bastard I am and you have no intention of ever seein' me again."

Sue Ellen lightly laughed and nodded. "That I can do."

"And one more thing," J.R. paused as his grin faded away. "Kiss my boy for me tonight."

Tears formed in Sue Ellen's eyes for a sudden sense of loss and regret she wouldn't allow herself to comprehend.

"I will."

An odd feeling came over her. She knew it was finally time to say goodbye to him but she didn't know how. She wasn't even sure if she wanted to. Goodbyes had rarely been needed between her and J.R. They had parted so many times in the past it now seemed inevitable they would meet again in the future and especially because of John Ross. Yet Sue Ellen sensed J.R. needed something from her. The same thing she needed from him. Some sign that the animosity of past grudges between them was truly gone. It couldn't be an afternoon in his hotel suite as he had suggested earlier but it could be ... something.

She closed her umbrella and tossed it through the open door onto the limousine floor then turned back to J.R. It didn't matter that the rain threatened to ruin her hairstyle. She reached up and removed his Stetson, letting her fingers run through the silky silver hair around and behind his ear. Her hand gradually followed the nape of his neck to the crisp line of his shirt collar then to his coat, slowly coming to rest as her fingers curled about the lapel.

Their eyes locked as she tugged at the material, pulling him down to her so she could lightly kiss him. The kiss intensified as J.R. gently placed his hands on her hips, bringing her against him as he wanted to earlier. Sue Ellen shifted slightly, molding her body against his with an easy familiarity that left him breathless. But it was soon over as she gradually began to pull away.

"Merry Christmas, darlin'," she softly whispered against his lips and stepped back.

J.R. reluctantly released her. "Merry Christmas, Sue Ellen."

She held out his hat and as he took it he lightly ran his fingers over the top of her hand, taking advantage of being able to touch her bare skin if only for a moment. Their fingers briefly intertwined before Sue Ellen withdrew. She gazed up at him as if trying to memorize his features then slowly gave him a smoldering half-smile and winked.

"I'll be watching the papers for news of your return," she said as she got in the car.

"Won't be long now, I promise," he said with a grin as he looked down to admire the long, slender legs she had just crossed.

With that, J.R. shut the door and the car pulled into traffic. He watched until it faded out of sight then placed the Stetson back on his head and pulled it down over his eyes, giving him a determined, dangerous look. It was time he returned to Paris and came up with a plan. He had a town to take back. Dallas would be his again and hopefully so would the lady he just let go.


	5. Part 5

LONDON RAIN, Part 5

Night had fallen over London making the Christmas lights sparkle through the rain. It made for a spectacular view from the window of J.R.'s hotel suite but as he stood looking out over the shining city the festive display didn't register. Deep in thought, he glowered out at images seen only in his thoughts. Sue Ellen and John Ross. He was only a few miles away from his wife and son but had never felt more alone.

He sighed heavily. He had lived his entire life without regrets, full of a defiant self-confidence that assured him victory no matter the odds. Yet that same self-assurance had deserted him the past few years, leaving him with so many regrets and so much self-doubt. He had nothing. Without power, he was half a man. The other half belonged to his family and they now lived a different life, one separate from him. What stung the most was he had no one to blame but himself.

His violent curse shattered the silence of the room. What the hell had happened? How had he let it happen? He stopped and shook his head, a flash of grief mixing with his anger. He knew exactly how it had happened. His losing streak began the day Sue Ellen left Southfork. It was if she had taken his luck with her, leaving him to stumble in the dark for nearly three years.

So much of his adult life had been spent either pledging eternal devotion to that woman or fighting against her with every resource he had available, even to the point of cruelty, treating her worse than some of his most formidable adversaries. That was one of the regrets that now cut him the deepest. What a way to treat the one woman who could fire him up like no other.

Yet in spite of it all, it seemed like when he was at his lowest she was there for him, even today. He finally smiled, remembering how she looked, how she felt only a few short hours ago. The time he had been given with her that afternoon had been like a gift from heaven. And that kiss she had left him with ... he could still feel it, still feel her molded so closely against him. Maybe it was a sign his luck was changing. It had to be luck. How else had he just happened to see her across the crowded halls of Harrods?

Their encounter had revitalized him, making him feel like he was ready to take on the whole damn world again. At least it had until he returned to the empty, silent hotel suite where the regrets and doubts came crashing back over him. And there was nothing he regretted more than refusing Sue Ellen's offer to see John Ross. Now it was too late. He would be on a plane back to Paris early in the morning.

Maybe it was for the best. He needed to somehow find a way to pull himself up by his bootstraps, make something of himself again and give his son something to be proud of. If only John Ross could be even a fraction as proud of him as he was of Jock. If only he could be the kind of father Jock had been for him - strong, brave, someone to look up to and admire. J.R. cursed out loud again. Why the hell did he turn and run when he had the chance to be with the boy?

The phone rang and startled J.R. out of the mire of his thoughts. It was about damn time that idiot from the Saudi field called him back. He was two hours late.

"Jacobs, I told you I wanted those reports at seven," J.R. growled into the phone receiver, his tone matching his black mood. "Where the hell have you been?"

"Well, whoever Jacobs is, I feel sorry for him," came the silky voice that had always reminded him of the smoky sweet texture of bourbon.

"Ah, hell," J.R. stammered, hardly believing he was hearing the voice that had only recently occupied his thoughts "I'm sorry, Sue Ellen. I've been expectin' a call from a field engineer in Saudi Arabia."

"It's good to hear you talking business again," she replied, the humor in her voice spreading to J.R., pushing his dark mood away. "Besides, I'm probably the last person you expected to hear from tonight."

"You got that right," he said with a smile. "But it sure is a nice surprise."

"Well, it might not be." The anxiety that suddenly replaced the warmth in her voice unsettled J.R. "There's, uh ... something you need to know. I made a big mistake this afternoon."

J.R. felt sick. Did she regret what had happened between them this afternoon? Was Lady Luck turning her back on him once again, robbing him of the one good thing that had happened to him in months?

"The traffic was terrible after I left you," Sue Ellen continued, "and I was afraid I was going to miss John Ross so I had the limousine driver take me directly to his school."

"That's all right. The car was yours for as long as you needed it." J.R. already knew the details of her trip. He had paid the driver two hundred pounds for his service including a complete report of everywhere they went. "Besides, the boy always did like ridin' in limos."

"Yes, he does. And I thought it would be a nice surprise for him," she added. "He was so excited when he saw me." She paused. "Except the first thing he asked was, 'Is Dad here?'"

J.R. paled. The regret of his decision not to see his son doubled like a vise around his chest.

"Damn it," he whispered.

"I'm sorry, J.R. I couldn't lie to him. You know how smart he is."

"No ... no, it's okay, darlin'," J.R. softly replied, emotion constricting his throat. "It's not your fault."

"He's been so quiet tonight," she added. "He wouldn't even eat dinner, said he didn't feel good. When I checked on him just now, he asked if you were mad at him." She paused, about to ask J.R. for something for the second time that day. "Look, I know it's a lot to ask, but could you please just come over and talk to him?"

"Of course I will," J.R. replied without hesitation. A steely resolution surged through him, empowering him for the first time in months. "Gimme your address, I'll be there as soon as I can."


	6. Part 6

LONDON RAIN, Part 6

The knock on the door startled Sue Ellen even though she had been expecting it. As she placed her hand on the doorknob, she briefly paused to close her eyes and take a deep breath, trying to settle the butterflies in her stomach. When she opened the door, the tall, shadowy figure wearing a cowboy hat did nothing to sooth her nerves. His presence was still so overpowering.

"Thank you for coming, J.R." Sue Ellen said as she stepped aside, allowing him to enter.

"Glad you called," he said as he passed. "I've kicked myself 'bout a hundred times for not acceptin' your offer to see him this afternoon."

J.R. quickly surveyed the warm, inviting room. It reflected the graceful style Sue Ellen gave to everything she touched. As he turned back to her, he saw her clothes were the same way … a simple white shirt tucked into jeans that looked so elegant. No pair of legs on planet made a pair of jeans look better.

"Where's the boy?" He asked, refocusing on why he was there.

"In his room ... I'll go get him."

"Wait." J.R. gently grabbed her arm as she passed. The touch allowed him to sense a hesitation, a faint muscle contraction that released before her weight shifted and she stopped. She could have broken away but he knew she was allowing him the contact. "Mind if I speak to him alone?"

There was a long, silent pause as Sue Ellen looked back at him, studying his expression. His eyes told her everything she needed to know. The hard steel gray had warmed into a pale blue, allowing the emotion he so often kept buried to shine through. In that instant, she sensed the sorrow and remorse inside of him, felt his loneliness and how much he had missed his son. Most importantly, she knew he was not a threat. Not tonight.

"No, of course I don't mind," she softly replied. J.R. released her, letting his fingers linger ever so slightly, then she pointed down the long hallway. "It's the last door on the left."

"Which door is your husband behind?"

The teasing comment was unexpected but made Sue Ellen smile, mostly because she realized he understood as well as she did that nothing more needed to be said. An unspoken pact had been made between them … the only thing that mattered at that moment was John Ross.

"He's at the Algonquin Hotel in New York ... on business."

"Huh." It was J.R.'s customary, derogatory response to anything he didn't approve of, somewhere between a superior snort and sarcastic chuckle. Coupled with a rather savage grin, Sue Ellen knew his thoughts were about her husband and probably not very nice. At least he knew better than to verbally express them.

J.R. slipped off his overcoat, revealing he hadn't taken time to put his suit jacket on before he left. It was so familiar, the way the collar of his crisp white dress shirt was open and two rolls were in each tailored sleeve. The look was Sue Ellen's personal favorite. Once his jacket was off and his sleeves were rolled up, so were his cares and worries about the oil business. Plus he wasn't nearly as intimidating as when he was dressed in a full suit.

His coat was tossed onto the couch and his hat was thoughtlessly placed on the ancient marble bust of Caesar recently brought back from Rome by Don. Sue Ellen nearly laughed out loud at the sheer nerve of her ex-husband, giving the Roman Emperor such an undignified look. Then again, J.R. embodied the Caesarian motto, Veni, vidi, vici - I came, I saw, I conquered.

As instructed, J.R. followed the hallway down to the last door on the left. It was closed but he had no doubt he was in the right place. A piece of paper was taped to the middle of the door bolding announcing in John Ross' handwriting, "Keep Out (except Mom)."

J.R. lightly tapped on the door. When he heard a muffled, "Come in," he opened the door and peeked around. The room was dimly lit by a bedside lamp shining down on John Ross who was lying on his back, his hands tucked behind his head, staring up at the ceiling. A broad smile reflected J.R.'s pride at the fact his son had copied one of his gestures.

"Howdy, son," J.R. gently called out. "Can I come in?"

John Ross sat up in bed, a puzzled look on his face. "Dad, what are you doing here?"

"I came to see you," J.R. replied with a grin as he entered. "You gettin' too old to let your daddy give you a hug?"

John Ross smiled and crawled out of bed to meet his father. J.R. quickly bent down and wrapped his arms around the boy, cradling his head against his.

"Oh, John Ross ... I have missed you, son. So much." J.R. blinked several times, clearing the blurry mist from his eyes, then gently slapped the boy's back before pulling away to look down at him again. "You're gettin' so big and tall! Your mamma must be feedin' you good."

"Yes, sir. She says I'm gonna be as tall as you some day."

"Well, she's probably right. All the Ewing men are tall. Then again, you might just take after your great-grandpa Southworth. What that man didn't have in height he surely did make up for with muscles. It's why your grandma is such a little firecracker."

John Ross smiled briefly then looked down at the floor, suddenly unsure what to do or say next, hoping he wouldn't do something wrong. He had waited so long for his father to show up, he longed to be perfect. He just didn't know how.

J.R. sensed his uneasiness and pointed to the bed. "Mind if we sit down here and have a talk?"

"No, sir."

They sat down next to each other and J.R. looked over at John Ross, somewhat surprised at the formality of his tone.

"So, tell me how you've been," J.R. asked.

"Very well, thank you."

"Your mamma says you're doing good in school."

"Yes, I really like my classes. Plus playing soccer."

"Soccer? I don't know much about it. Wanna teach me sometime?"

"Sure ... if you want."

"I'd like that," J.R. replied, increasingly worried at the difficulty in engaging his own son in conversation. But what had he expected? He hadn't seen John Ross face to face in months. "John Ross … I owe you an apology, son."

Surprised, John Ross looked over at his father. "An apology for what?"

"'Cause I messed up earlier, when I wasn't with your mamma when she picked you up at school."

"Oh, that ... it's okay," John Ross replied and looked away again. The disappointment in his voice clearly said it wasn't.

"No, son, I don't think it is okay. I think I've been lettin' you down quite a bit lately, haven't I?"

John Ross shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know. I just figured you were still mad at me because I came here to live with Mom."

J.R. was stunned by the comment. "No, John Ross ... I'm not mad at you. About anything."

"Then did I do something else wrong? Or is it because you have James and Little Jimmy now? You no longer need me."

The simple, direct comment was so honest it cut into J.R.'s heart like a dagger. He knew John Ross hadn't liked James, thought it was merely a case of childish jealousy. That's why he thought it best to leave the boy with Sue Ellen until he got over it. Only now could J.R. see what a huge miscalculation that had been. Ignoring John Ross had only intensified his sense of betrayal.

"I'm always gonna need you, John Ross," J.R. gently replied. "A man couldn't ask for a better son than you."

"What about James?" John Ross angrily countered. "He did a lot of things better than I did."

"That's not true, son. James was just older than you and knew a little more about things, that's all."

"And you liked him better because of it."

It was a painful remark for both John Ross to admit and J.R. to hear. An uncomfortable silence settled between them before J.R. reached over to tip the boy's chin up and look into his eyes. It was time for some honesty.

"John Ross," J.R. slowly started, "when James came to Dallas, I know I gave him a lot of attention and didn't spend enough time with you." John Ross shrugged, unintentionally acknowledging his father's admission. "Well, that was a real dumb thing to do 'cause nothin' and nobody means more to me than you." When John Ross didn't answer, J.R. knowingly smiled and continued. "Yeah, I know. Why should you believe me? I haven't given you much reason to trust me lately. But, son ... I am sorry. Sorry for a lot of things that happened before you left. James ... Cally ... mistakes I made that affected you ... hurt you. And what really upsets me is I don't even have an excuse for any of it."

John Ross momentarily considered what J.R. said then slowly nodded. "It's because of Mom, isn't it? Things were never the same after she left Southfork."

The boy's insight was dead on target, making J.R. flinch. All the oil in Texas would have been worth a shot of bourbon at that moment.

"You might be on to somethin' there, boy," J.R. quietly said after a moment. "Her leavin' Southfork caused all kinds of problems."

John Ross nodded. "Yeah, it did."

J.R. reached over and placed his hand on the boy's shoulder, giving him a loose hug. "Wish I could change that … but I can't. However, I can change what happened between you and me. Any chance you'd let me make some of this up to you?"

"How long before you go back to Dallas?" John Ross asked skeptically.

"I'm livin' in Paris now. I'll be here anytime you want me. Just call."

John Ross looked over and studied his father, almost disbelieving. "Paris? Really?"

"Yes," J.R. grinned. "Texas was too far away from you."

"Wow ... Paris," John Ross said slowly, barely allowing himself to believe his secret wish of having his father closer might really be coming true.

"I'm hopin' it will give us the chance to get to know each other again," J.R. added.

John Ross nodded. "Yeah, maybe so." Then he looked over at his father. "I'd like that."

J.R. was instantly captivated by the large, luminous eyes so much like Sue Ellen's yet the color that matched his own.

"Say, you ever noticed how much we have in common?" J.R. remarked. "Just look at our eyes. They are the same color."

"Mom tells me that all the time." John Ross replied, finally smiling.

"Well, she is somethin' else we share. There is nothin' more important to a man than the love of a good woman, whether it's his mamma or his wife. Lucky for us, she is the same lady." J.R. grinned as a distant recollection came to him and he playfully elbowed his son in the side. "The day we found out she was pregnant with you ... damn! Your granddaddy was so proud. The Ewing heir ... the true Ewing heir was finally on the way." J.R. considered that statement, realizing how important it was … how important John Ross truly was to not only him but to all the Ewings. There was no doubt about how proud Jock would be of the boy today. "John Ross," he continued, "that is somethin' no one will ever take away from you. You are your granddaddy's legacy. You have his name, just like me, and we are the only two people who carry it for him. That has always been an honor for me and I hope some day it will be for you, too."

John Ross contemplated the statement then nodded. "It already is, Dad. I just wish I could remember Grandpa better. Can you miss someone you don't even know?"

"Sure you can" J.R. replied, momentarily stunned by the emotion the remark stirred up in him. "Your granddaddy's spirit was big enough for three men. It's no wonder you can still feel him. Besides, the day you came home from the hospital was just about the happiest days of his life. I think there was a special bond between you two right from the start."

John Ross fell silent, thinking about his grandfather. After a moment, he turned to J.R. "Kinda like what we had ... huh, Dad?"

J.R. nodded. "Yes. And we'll have again if you'll give me a chance."

"You sure you're not going back to Dallas?"

"Not a chance," J.R. grinned. "Not while you and your mamma are here in London."

John Ross offered his hand to his father. "Okay, it's a deal. We'll give it a try."

J.R. softly laughed at the typically Ewing gesture, happily taking the boy's hand and shaking it.

"I am so damn glad you're my son!" J.R. proudly said. "Nothing is ever gonna change that and don't you ever forget it."

"I won't, Daddy," John Ross beamed. "I promise."

Hearing John Ross finally call him "daddy" again stirred up many emotions in J.R. Any man could be a father, any man could be called "sir", but when a son called a Texan father "daddy" it was the ultimate meaning of love and respect.

They looked at each other for a moment before their expressions simultaneously broke into smiles and pulled each other into a hug.

"I love you, boy," J.R. gently whispered.

Never again would he take his son for granted.


	7. Part 7

LONDON RAIN, Part 7

Over an hour later, Sue Ellen cautiously moved down the hall to John Ross' room, listening for any sound but finding everything quiet. She stopped at the door and looked in. John Ross was lying against J.R.'s shoulder, sleeping peacefully. J.R. was stretched out next to him, one long leg bent over the side of the bed, his foot resting on the floor. His back was propped up against the headboard, his head tilted to the side, resting against his son's. He was also asleep.

Sue Ellen smiled as she took in the sweet image before her, admiring how serene they both were. It was as though no time or tension had passed between them. J.R. had obviously worked his charm and triumphed once again, just like he had done so many times with her. So many times she had ended up in the exact place John Ross was now, sleeping at J.R.'s side. Those were some happy times ... passionate times.

With a deep breath, Sue Ellen slammed a mental brake on those memories and walked into the room. She stooped down next to J.R. and lightly placed her hand on his knee. He didn't stir. She glanced over at his hand resting protectively on his son's arm. He had beautiful hands. Long, tapered fingers that seemed better suited for an artist or musician than an oil baron. Gently, she reached over and slid her fingers under his palm then lifted his hand away from John Ross.

The movement finally woke J.R. Even asleep he had sensed she was near. He responded to no other woman's touch quite like he did to hers. The feel of her fingers against the palm of his hand sent a cascade of heat through his body.

The quicksilver glow in his sleepy eyes and the sly grin both enchanted and alarmed Sue Ellen. She raised an eyebrow that mirrored her half-smile then abruptly dropped his hand on his leg. J.R. suppressed an amused laugh at her reaction.

She stood up and motioned for him to follow her then headed to the door. J.R. took the opportunity to watch her walk away, admiring the subtle movement of her long, graceful form. It was a smooth, feline combination of her early runway training as a model and beauty queen, her ramrod straight posture, and the self-assured confidence that now gave her such a sexy appeal.

Forcing himself to look away, J.R. glanced down at his son then lightly kissed the top of his head before gently wiggling free from him. Standing was difficult. Both his back and legs had stiffened from the awkward position he had fallen asleep in but once he was on his feet he looked down on his son once more. Tucking the blanket securely around John Ross' neck, he lovingly rested his hand on his head. How had he ever let the boy slip away from him? That thought caused a determined look to sharpen J.R.'s gaze. All the more reason to stop hiding out like a whipped dog and take back his life.

J.R. switched off the bedside lamp then turned to the door where Sue Ellen was waiting. Leaning against the frame, her arms folded across her chest, she was lit from behind with the shadows emphasizing the sleek lines of her face and body. Damn, she looked beautiful. As he approached her the basic male instinct that had awakened at her touch doubled, making him want to take her in his arms, spend the night in her bed, wake up in the morning and simply be with his wife and son. But then his rational mind took over. She wasn't his wife and he was standing in another man's house.

Once again J.R. forced himself to look away from her, out into the hall. He turned sideways as he passed, missing her except for a faint touch of the material of his shirt against her bare arm. If only he had known the chaos the intimate touch had sent through her, his instincts would have won out.

Out in the hallway, J.R. glanced back to see Sue Ellen look once more at their son before quietly closing the door. When she turned to face him, a moment of uncomfortable silence passed between them, leaving them both uncharacteristically at a loss for words. When Sue Ellen turned and went down the hall, he followed.

"Well, darlin'," J.R. quietly said, breaking their silence when they reached the living room. "Say what you will but somethin' good did come from our marriage. That beautiful boy back there."

Sue Ellen turned to him and nodded. "Yes. We finally have something we can agree on."

He gave her a quizzical look. "Our marriage wasn't all bad, was it?"

"No ... it was a disaster." Her voice was surprisingly clinical with no trace of anger or bitterness. "Our marriage brought out the worst in me, J.R. Possessiveness, resentment, jealousy, alcoholism. Now I wonder if part of my problem might have been I was as addicted to you as I was to vodka. I couldn't control how much I wanted either of you then you both left me hung over and full of regrets."

Even though the words weren't intentionally spiteful, J.R. inwardly cringed.

"Would it help any to know how much I regret the way I treated you?" He gently said.

Sue Ellen was surprised by his quiet, remorseful reaction. "I think you mean that."

"I do, darlin'. Never so much as now … when I see the lady you've become." The lady I can't have, he silently added.

The tangible remorse and loneliness in his voice removed all doubt he was anything but sincere. It was the same quicksand of thoughts and feelings she had sensed in him earlier. The only difference was her attraction to him had increased dramatically. Why did fate keep bringing J.R. back into her life at his greatest times of need? Why had she been given the ability to feel his thoughts and emotions? After all they had been through she should hate him. Yet at that moment, she instinctively knew how much he needed her, needed to be with her. And what surprised her is how much she wanted to give it all to him and more.

The phone rang and jolted her back to reality. She knew it was Don. He called every night at this time to check on her and John Ross. When she reached down and picked up the phone, it felt almost too heavy to lift.

"Hello? ... Hi, luv. ... How's New York?"

J.R. turned from her, unable to tolerate being once again so close to her yet so far away. The unrequited desire was so strong it made his stomach ache. God, how he needed her at that moment, both physically and emotionally. But it wasn't possible. He knew that. And if he stayed and listened to her talk to her husband, he would be sick. A quick, quiet exit while she was still on the phone would probably be best for both of them. Besides, he wasn't sure if he could say goodbye to her for the second time today.

He reached over and removed his hat from the statue then walked over to the couch where he had left his coat. Each step felt like ten pounds of lead had been added to his boots but he forced himself to use as much Texas swagger as he could muster. He lifted the coat and quickly slipped it on then turned and set out for the door.

All he had to do was walk through it. He didn't have to acknowledge her. He knew he shouldn't. However, he couldn't resist the temptation to look at her beautiful face just once more.

Sue Ellen hadn't taken her eyes off J.R. She mentally felt torn in two, trying to both listen to her husband on the phone and fight the desire to run into her ex-husband's arms. Even with Don's voice in her ear, it was heartbreaking to watch as J.R. distanced himself from her.

Just before he reached the door, J.R. looked back at her, quickly taking in everything about her in a long, longing glance. Then he smiled. It was a warm, striking smile set off by the deep passion she recognized in his eyes. He winked at her while opening the door then was gone.

Sue Ellen quickly sat down on the couch as the strength in her legs evaporated. Over the phone, Don called out to her again ... and again.

"Sue Ellen? Sue Ellen, are you still there, luv?" There was a hint of panic in his voice. She finally recognized it and answered.

"Yes, Don ... I ..." Her voice broke, the huskiness from her body's uncontrollable attraction to a man she shouldn't want nearly betraying her. She attempted to continue. "Sorry, I'm a bit distracted. John Ross was calling to me ... he needs me. Can I call you back?"

With that, Sue Ellen hung up the phone then buried her face in her hands. Yes, John Ross needed her, almost as much as his son had needed him earlier. And there wasn't a damn thing she could about it now, either to help J.R. or quiet the out-of-control sexual pull he had her trapped in.

She immediately corrected herself. That was an unfair assessment. For once in his life, J.R. hadn't done it on purpose. She knew that from the uncharacteristically noble way he pulled back when Don called. But what truly surprised her was how deeply she wanted him. Her hands still trembled from her own reaction. Whatever was happening between them, it was mutual and very strong. But it had to end tonight.

The finality of that thought brought unexpected tears to her eyes. After all these years, she was amazed that she could still cry about J.R. Ewing.


	8. Part 8

LONDON RAIN, Part 8 

J.R. bolted down another shot of bourbon, his fifth since returning to his hotel suite. It had been hours since he left Sue Ellen's house yet he could still see her eyes, hear her voice, and the grip of desire for her was still like an iron fist that wouldn't unclench.

He looked over at the phone. He longed to pick it up and call her, just to hear her voice. But what would be the point? What was there to say? Instead, he lifted the receiver and dialed a familiar number.

"Ratagan? J.R. here. Listen, I ... What? ... I'm not paying you to tell me what time it is, that's what I gotta watch for! Now, listen ... I want you to reopen the file on Don Lockwood. I wanna know every skeleton in his closet, including all the new ones. And get back to me as soon as possible, you hear? ... No, I'm in London. I'll be here for a few days. You can reach me at the Lanesborough Hotel."

With that, J.R. hung up the phone. He wasn't sure Ratagan would find anything new on Lockwood but he wanted to make damn sure no possibility was overlooked. Not where his family was concerned. Including the woman he couldn't get out of his mind.

-

The next morning, Sue Ellen quietly opened the door to John Ross' bedroom and looked in on him. It was still early for a Saturday morning but she knew if she didn't wake him now he would be late for his soccer game.

As she watched him sleep, she remembered the sweet little baby he had been yet admired the young man he was turning into. And he was growing up so fast. He was going to be such a handsome man, a beautiful combination of the Shepard refinement and Ewing masculinity. Even now as maturity continued to define the contours of his face, it was striking how she was beginning to traces of his father.

His father. Sue Ellen sighed. J.R. had stormed back into their lives less than 24 hours ago yet so much had changed. So much emotional baggage had been put to rest and that could only be good for them all. But there were disadvantages to their reunion. Her instant attraction to J.R. was what disturbed her most. After so much time, she couldn't understand why it was still so difficult to resist him … or why she couldn't reach that same level of attraction with other men.

She regretted that thought. It was a betrayal to her husband. No, the love she felt for Don wasn't the intense kind that demanded her full attention and devotion but their relationship worked. Besides, she reasoned, living with an artistically creative man in London was a big part of her attraction to Don, mostly because it was such a complete change from J.R. and Dallas.

Sue Ellen finally stopped herself, irritated she was even thinking of her ex-husband in ridiculously romantic terms again. Why had J.R. showing up in London unannounced suddenly made her question anything about her marriage to Don? Wasn't J.R. the one who taught her all her bad habits about marriage? She paused to consider the idea. Maybe it was because things were far from perfect with her marriage and J.R. had nothing to do with it.

Now that Don owned his own production company, he was spending more and more time away from home. What really surprised Sue Ellen, though, was that his extended trips didn't really bother her … she actually enjoyed the freedom. However, she did miss him, missed being able to talk to him and share normal, everyday occurrences. Plus it had been several weeks since they had been on the same continent let alone shared their bed. Maybe that was the reason she had been so susceptible to J.R. last night.

John Ross stirred, breaking Sue Ellen out of her thoughts. She would think about all of that later. As she entered the room and approached the bed, she reaffirmed to herself that John Ross was still and would always be the focal point of her life, the rest of the men be damned.

"Good morning, John Ross," she softly said with a smile, knowing he wouldn't be receptive to the wake-up call.

John Ross quickly rolled over and looked up at her, startling her with the rare burst of morning energy.

"Mom, is Dad here?" He eagerly asked.

Sue Ellen was momentarily speechless. "Your dad? No. Why would he be here?"

"Oh man," John Ross replied, his good mood instantly turned gloomy. "I thought for sure he'd spend the night. I was hoping you would ask him to."

"John Ross ..." she stalled, trying to think of a way to sidestep his inquiry. His perceptiveness had surprised her. Thank goodness he would never know how close he was to being right.

"Mom, it's okay," John Ross grinned. "I figured you and Dad out a long time ago. No matter what happens between you two, it doesn't take long before you're back together again. I was just hoping it would be last night."

Sue Ellen knew there was a great deal of innocence behind the comment but was still surprised by how mature the observation was.

"John Ross, we've been over this before," she gently reprimanded him. "I'm with Don now and your father and I have moved on."

"I know, I know," John Ross replied, trying to hide him impatience. "But that's when Dad was living in Dallas. Now he's in Paris and …"

"I am still be married to Don," she interjected.

"Yeah, but now we can go see Dad whenever we want. He's all alone, Mom … he needs us."

Sue Ellen looked over at John Ross and shook her head, knowing only too well the scheming that was going on in her son's mind.

"John Ross Ewing the Third, whatever it is you're planning, you forget about it right now!"

"Oh, Mom ..." he cringed at hearing his full name.

"Look sweetheart, I know you're not a big fan of my marriage to Don." John Ross rolled his eyes and she gave him a disapproving glance. "But I do love him. And nothing is going to happen between your father and me so you need to stop thinking about it because you'll just be disappointed."

The grin crept back to John Ross' face. "At least you'll be together during the soccer game today."

"What do you mean?"

"I invited Dad to come to the game. Didn't he tell you last night?"

Explaining to her son that she had hardly spoken to J.R. before he left last night would be impossible.

"No," she replied quietly then forced a smile. "He had to leave ... I got a phone call."

"Oh." John Ross' grin was now very mischievous and identical to his father's.

Exasperated but amused, Sue Ellen grinned as she reached down and messed up his hair. "Will you stop growing up so fast?!" She motioned for him to move over and sat down next to him on the edge of the bed. "So …you must be feeling better about your dad, huh?"

John Ross smiled and nodded. "Yeah, we're cool. He said a lot of things last night that made me feel better. He even told me I am Grandpa Ewing's ... oh, what did he call it?"

Sue Ellen nodded, knowing the mantra so well. "His legacy."

"Yep, his legacy! And me and Dad are the only ones who have Grandpa's name. Dad says no one will ever take that away from me. Not James or Jimmy or anybody else."

"Well, he's right. You are going to be one of the best and brightest of the Ewings and your Grandpa Ewing would be so proud of you, just like the rest of us."

"That's kinda like what Dad told me."

"Good. It makes me happy you were able to hear it from him, too."

"Yeah. I've really missed him, Mom."

Sue Ellen knowingly smiled and reached over to touch his cheek. "Oh, sweetheart ... I know you have. I'm glad he came over last night."

John Ross looked at her for a moment then smiled. "Me, too."

"Okay, you," she said as she quickly stood up, deliberately changing the subject. "How about if we talk about this over breakfast? Go take your shower and I'll have it ready by the time you're done."

"Good, I'm starvin'!"

Sue Ellen laughed at her son's enthusiasm for food. It was another trait he shared with his father.

As John Ross got up and went into his bathroom, Sue Ellen turned to leave the room and caught sight of the photo sitting on his dresser. It was of him and J.R. on the last Southfork cattle drive before John Ross came to London. She stopped for a moment and looked at it as she had done so many times before.

Those identical grins, she thought with a smile.

She had no idea how she was going to get through the next few hours with her ex-husband, especially with her son now plotting to get them together. But she knew she had to think of something. She had to prove to John Ross … and even to herself … that all she would ever share with J.R. from now on was some sort of camaraderie.

Anything else was unthinkable.


	9. Part 9

LONDON RAIN, Part 9

J.R. entered the indoor soccer field and instantly wished he was back at the hotel in bed. Between the bright lights and spontaneous cheers bouncing off the corrugated metal walls, his hung-over headache was pounding. Plus he was bone-tired after a very restless night. Now if he could get his blurry eyes to focus on either of the familiar faces he was looking for.

He spotted John Ross practicing on the field at the same moment his son spotted him. Relieved, J.R. gave him a short wave and when John Ross came running over, J.R. felt his mood instantly improve. His son looked like a model athlete, so handsome in the dark blue and white striped soccer shirt and matching dark blue shorts. His build reminded J.R. of Bobby at that age when his baby brother had excelled at every sport he played without even trying. It was obvious John Ross was going to be the same way and J.R. couldn't have been more proud.

"Hey, Dad!" John Ross shouted as he approached. "Glad you could make it!"

"I wouldn't have missed it, son." J.R. replied as he put his arm around John Ross' shoulder, giving him a quick squeeze before firmly slapping him on the back a few times.

"Mom's waiting for you … right up there." John Ross pointed to the seating area two sections down. Near the top of the section, Sue Ellen stood watching them, smiling. "I told her to save you a seat." A whistle sounded and John Ross quickly looked out onto the field then back at his father. "Gotta go! See you after the game?"

"I'll be here!" J.R. grinned as he watched his son run off and join his team. Then he looked back to the stands. Sue Ellen still stood, obviously waiting for him, and he began his walk over to join her.

His headache made navigating the stairs a little difficult but when he reached the top, J.R. was rewarded with a warm smile from Sue Ellen that made the trip worth it. She was literally a sight for sore eyes.

Dressed in jeans, she wore a baggy blue and white striped sweatshirt that matched John Ross' jersey over a button-down oxford shirt. Even a sweatshirt looked sophisticated on her but more importantly, she still looked like a lady. That was the first thing he had noticed about her all those years ago at the Miss Texas beauty pageant.

"Howdy, Miz Texas," he drawled, echoing his thoughts.

"Oh please," Sue Ellen laughed even though she was flattered by the compliment. "I'm a long way from that pageant."

"But just as beautiful."

Sue Ellen instantly sobered and took him by the arm, leading him to an empty section of the seats. Knowing he was capable of saying anything, she had purposefully sat up high to isolate him.

"Now look, don't you start," she whispered.

"Start what?" He was puzzled by her accusation.

"Flirting with me. We are surrounded by my neighbors … people who know Don … and I could really do without a scandal today."

Even though it made his head pound, J.R. laughed loudly at her sense of propriety. He couldn't resist. Both the situation and her request were comical … until he received an angry stare from her that stopped him cold. The woman was still a master of glares, just like a proper Texas lady should be. They could cut you to pieces with just a look and smile while doing it.

"Okay," J.R. finally relented, attempting a more dignified attitude. "Don't go gettin' all worried. I'll behave myself, I promise. God forbid we should upset the neighbors."

As they sat down, Sue Ellen looked over at him, savoring a least one victory over him. He looked tired and a little pale but much more relaxed than he had been yesterday. It could have been he had finally given up his customary business suit for a black blazer over a white dress shirt and a rare pair of jeans. His cowboy boots were as sharp as ever, though. They were an expensive pair of black leather tooled with an intricate design. The only thing missing was his hat.

"You look a little naked, darlin'." She had quickly forgotten about the neighbors, instead deliberately choosing the words to get a reaction out of him. When he turned to her, she grinned, knowing she had succeeded. "Where's your cowboy hat?"

"In the car," J.R. said with a frown, realizing she was teasing him, then looked out over the playing field, trying to keep John Ross in sight. "I didn't want anyone thinkin' I was a 'cowboy' like that half-breed brother of mine."

Now it was her turn to laugh, recalling the comment she had made about his hat yesterday as they had walked along the streets of London.

"Sue Ellen," J.R. said with a scowl. "If you can tear yourself away from findin' amusement at my expense would you mind explainin' this game to me so I know what I'm watchin'?"

"My, you're grumpy today," she replied. J.R. glared at her and she finally knew what the problem was … his bloodshot eyes gave him away. "Oh," she murmured knowingly. "Bitten by some of Kentucky's Finest last night, weren't you?"

J.R. finally gave in and chuckled even though there was no humor in it. "You ain't kiddin'."

When the teams came onto the field, tthe crowd erupted in a loud cheer, making J.R. flinch. He leaned over, resting his elbow on his knee as he closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. It was the tell-tale sign he had one hell of a headache. When the noise momentarily died down as the players took their positions, he looked over at Sue Ellen.

"You wouldn't happen to have any aspirin in that purse of yours, would ya?"

"I think I might," she said with a touch of amusement as she reached into her purse and pulled out a small bottle of aspirin. "I never did understand your love affair with bourbon."

"It felt better than a sleepin' pill last night."

"Awww," Sue Ellen said with mock sympathy as she opened the aspirin bottle and let two pills fall out into her hand.

"Three," J.R. said as he watched her.

"Three?" She looked over at him then looked back at the bottle and knitted her eyebrows together. "Ooo, ouch."

As Sue Ellen handed him the pills, he briefly wrapped his fingers around hers, taking advantage of the chance to touch her. She quickly pulled her hand away.

"J.R., you promised to behave yourself," she warned even as she tried to suppress a smile.

"Why? You haven't been." He said as he popped the aspirin into his mouth.

"I can't believe you're still doing that," she said with a shudder, reaching for her water bottle and handing it him. "Here, take a drink of water before you choke on those pills."

J.R. grinned at her reaction. His ability to take pills without water had always bothered her and he had taken the nasty-tasting aspirin straight just for her benefit. The reward was she so willingly offered to share her bottle of water with him, unbothered by the intimate gesture. He took a drink then handed the bottle back to her.

"Drink the rest," she commanded. "It will help your headache."

He did as he was told and was feeling better already. He had nearly forgotten how nice it was to have her look after him.

"Okay, I'm ready" he said, bracing himself as another cheer erupted from the crowd. "Now tell me all about soccer."


	10. Part 10

LONDON RAIN, Part 10

Throughout the game, especially when John Ross had the ball, Sue Ellen patiently explained all the soccer moves to J.R., secretly thankful they had something neutral to talk about. She was impressed by how easily J.R. picked up the basic concepts but his mind always had been tuned to grasping the details of any situation.

The game ended with John Ross' team winning 5-2. He had made a dozen key passes and even scored a goal, which had thrilled both of his parents, his father most of all since he had been there to see it.

Wanting to escape the crowd and players after the game, Sue Ellen suggested they wait outside by her car for John Ross. As they exited, the late morning sun was trying to break through the cold damp of the legendary London fog that had firmly settled in over the city but the chill in the air was biting. J.R. retrieved his hat and overcoat from the limousine he had arrived in then sent the car back to the hotel.

Now sitting against the front fender of Sue Ellen's car, J.R. watched as she quietly paced in front of him.

"Your husband isn't gonna mind me spendin' the day with you and John Ross, is he?" Not that he cared either way. The casual remark was simply meant to break the silence between them.

Sue Ellen turned to him. The black cowboy hat was pulled down low, shadowing J.R.'s eyes, but she could still see the blue sparkle shining out. Another tingle of attraction was set off in the nerves of her stomach and she continued pacing, wondering if she had made a mistake by asking him to stay.

"He'll have to get used to it, won't he?" She replied indifferently. "Because you'll be spending more time with your son from now on, I hope."

"You can count on that," he nodded and grinned.

"That's going to make John Ross happy."

"How 'bout his mamma?"

Sue Ellen didn't answer, just continued to pace. J.R. watched her until the back and forth movement started to make his head pound.

"Sue Ellen, ever since the game ended you've been as nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rockin' chairs. So if there's somethin' botherin' you, just spit it out."

"I am not nervous!" The irritation in her tone confirmed his suspicions.

"Then why are you pacin' like a penned up wildcat?" Still she paced. "You worried about bein' alone with me, darlin'?"

That made her stop. "Hell no!"

J.R. persisted. "Then you frettin' about what happened last night?"

"J.R., that is the most idiotic idea you've ever invented," she lied, irritated that he knew exactly what was bothering her. "Nothing happened last night."

"Yeah, but it could have."

She angrily turned to him. "In a house I share with my husband, with your son asleep down the hall and after only a few hours of seeing you for the first time in years? How stupid do you think I am?"

"Who said anything about you bein' stupid?"

"Well, nothing happened … nothing is going to happen," she replied defensively as she started to pace again. "No matter how much you and John Ross plot to change my mind."

"John Ross? What's he got to do with this?"

"Oh, come on, J.R. I don't know what you told him last night but when he woke up this morning, he was sure you had spent the night. The first thing he wanted to know was if you were there."

"He did?" J.R.'s expression changed from quizzical to amused then he chuckled. "Well, I had nothin' to do with that. He's a smart boy, he must've figured it out for himself."

Frustrated, Sue Ellen stopped again and put her hands on her hips. She silently cursed, wondering if her momentary attraction to her ex-husband had really been that obvious.

"Look, if it's botherin' you this much," J.R. added, "just blame me. 'Cause I won't deny it, I wanted to take you to bed last night." He looked at her for a moment, the hint of a smile in his expression. "I was kinda thinkin' the feelin' was mutual."

"J.R., that doesn't help." When she didn't deny or contradict how close they had been, it secretly pleased J.R. "Whatever it was … heat of the moment, temporary insanity, whatever … if anything had happened, it would have complicated so many things."

"I know that," he said sincerely. "Do you really think when I woke up yesterday mornin' I planned on not only seein' you but spendin' the night with you?"

"No," she quietly replied to his logic.

"Well, for whatever reason it happened, I'm glad it did. And I won't apologize for that. Besides, when has my wantin' you ever had anything to do with bein' rational?"

Sue Ellen looked over at him again. He was right. And more importantly, she knew he understood why she was upset.

"It has to stop," she said firmly. "Today. Right now."

"Why don't you just ask me to stop breathin'? It'd be easier." He saw the disappointment in her expression before she turned away from him again. He spoke quickly, choosing to soothe her over trying to regain control of the situation. "Hell, honey, I can't even name what happened to us yesterday let alone stop it. If I could, I swear to you, I would."

Sue Ellen stopped and sighed, exasperated. "J.R. …"

"I know," he said, holding up his hand in appeasement, trying to calm her. "The last thing in the world I wanna do is hurt you again. You've gotta believe that. But I am so drawn to you right now, Sue Ellen. And it's so much more than just wantin' to seduce you. It's like I want to feel a connection to you again … and to John Ross." He shrugged his shoulders. "Why else would I have come here? Maybe it's because I'm so outta place right now. No company, no family, no home. I don't know …" His voice trailed off as he realized how much information he had just volunteered. Had he just given her ammunition if she decided to revive their fight that had started back in Dallas?

Sue Ellen looked at him for several long moments. She knew he had just left himself wide open for attack yet the reasons why he had made himself so vulnerable intrigued her. Last night she had analyzed and gone over every possible angle he might have and found nothing. Yet the decades-old suspicions and mistrust still made her wary of him.

"You are a very lonely, lost man, J.R." She observed. "Was any of the oil or women worth this?"

With two simple sentences she had summed up everything that was wrong in his life. It should have been embarrassing … humiliating. But just having someone understand was so comforting nothing else mattered.

"Look, just bein' with you and our son … sharin' this day with you … it's all I want. Then I'll be back in Paris and everything will go back to normal, I promise." He flashed her a sincere smile that once again did nothing to calm her nerves. "Besides, we'll have John Ross between us today. What could possibly happen?" He could see she was still hesitating and having recovered a little, decided to use a little charm. "C'mon. I'll be such a gentleman, you won't even recognize me."

Sue Ellen reluctantly smiled. "Oh, great. Now I'm really nervous."

The tension was over. The things that needed to be said were out in the open. Relieved, they looked at each other for a moment then started to laugh just as John Ross approached.

"What are you two laughing about?" He asked, thrilled to see his parents getting along so well.

"Seems like no matter how smart I think I am," J.R. replied, "you're mamma is the one who always comes out right." J.R. winked at Sue Ellen as he stood up and put his arm around John Ross. She shook her head, disbelieving the way he could still charm her even as she continued to smile. J.R. transferred his grin to his son. "That was one hell of a game, son!"

"Thanks, Dad," John Ross beamed, returning the grin. "So glad you could be here."

"I wouldn't have missed it for the world. You looked like a champ out there!" J.R. motioned to Sue Ellen with his thumb. "Say, your mamma has invited me to spend the afternoon with the both of you. How would you feel about that?"

"Are you kidding? It would be great!"

"Then let's get started," Sue Ellen said. "How about lunch?"

"Yeah!" John Ross' enthusiastic reply was no surprise.

"J.R.," Sue Ellen said as she looked over at him, trying to gauge how he was feeling. "Any preferences?"

J.R. wasn't sure he was quite up to lunch yet - a simple cup of coffee sounded much better - but there was no chance he was going to disappoint his son.

"Anything but Chinese food," J.R. quipped. "How 'bout takin' me to one of your favorite spots?"

John Ross looked over at his mother. "How about The Texas Embassy, Mom? I think Dad would like that."

"Yes, he would," Sue Ellen nodded and looked over at J.R. "You told me you were looking for a good steak in London."

"I'm always lookin' for a good steak," J.R. grinned. "And any restaurant with 'Texas' in it's name has gotta be good."

"Then let's go," she said and gestured to the car.

"Cool!" John Ross couldn't contain his eagerness. "You're gonna love it, Dad!! Don doesn't like Mexican food so it's usually just me and Mom who go there."

J.R. laughed at his son's enthusiasm, the last traces of his headache finally fading away as he headed to the car door. "I'm lookin' forward to it."

Lagging behind, Sue Ellen wrapped her arm around John Ross' shoulder and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.

"It was a great game, sweetheart," she said with a smile.

"Thanks, Mom," he replied for so much more than the compliment.

As she watched him get into the car, Sue Ellen realized that whatever happened between her and J.R. no longer mattered. Seeing John Ross this happy was worth dealing with J.R. … whatever he had in store for them.


	11. Part 11

LONDON RAIN, Part 11

One of the first things Sue Ellen discovered when she moved to London was everything she had heard about the food was true. Compared to the hot, spicy flavors of Texas, the English diet was bland. However, eating out in London was not. The vast number of multicultural communities throughout the city created a wide variety of world cuisine ranging from Chinese to Italian, French to Bangladeshi, Thai to Ethiopian, Russian to Indonesian, with the more exotic cooking of anywhere seemingly being preferred to the traditional home recipes. There were even American restaurants in the mix and Sue Ellen had made a point to take John Ross and visit as many as possible.

Once during a trip to London's celebrated West End to see a play, she was surprised to find right around the corner from Trafalgar Square a Texas state flag gently ruffling in the wind, bolding announcing the entrance to the Texas Embassy Cantina. Though she didn't go in, the restaurant instantly enchanted her. With country music playing in the background and brightly lit by festival lights, it lived up to everything she loved about Texas and Texans - it was loud, bigger than life, and looked like damn good fun.

The restaurant spanned two floors, resembling a combination of a 19th-century Texas frontier saloon and an old Mexican village at fiesta time. Besides the food, widely known as being the best Tex-Mex available in London, the main attraction was the Texas Long Bar which featured a staggering variety of Tequila and Mexican beer. Also popular was the Mercado, a merchandise shop that sold a variety of Texas Embassy souvenirs. It was a favorite of John Ross who loved to wear symbols from the state he was born in.

As Sue Ellen entered the restaurant with her son and J.R., she was instantly reminded of what she loved most about the restaurant - the smell. It was a combination of warm tortillas, hot spices, steaks on the grill and barbeque sauce. So much like all the warm afternoons spent at the Ewing rodeos and barbeques.

She looked over at her ex-husband, who had just slipped off his hat in the customary tradition when inside. From his expression, it was obvious he was experiencing the same sensation. As if sensing her gaze, J.R. looked at Sue Ellen.

"Smells like home," he said with an honest smile.

"I thought so, too," she replied.

A waiter soon approached the family. "We must have a true Texan with us today," the young man said to J.R. with a charming London accent. "No one else in this city bothers to remove their hat when they come in here."

"Well, my mamma back in Dallas wouldn't have it any other way," J.R. replied.

"Then welcome to a little part of Texas in London, sir," the young man grinned. "And feel free to wear your hat. We don't stand on formality around here. Consider this a barbeque in your own backyard."

Sue Ellen laughed. If only the young man knew what an experience a Southfork barbeque was.

As they were led to the table, J.R. replaced his cowboy hat and grinned. "John Ross, you sure know how to pick restaurants."

John Ross looked up at J.R. and returned his grin, delighted by the compliment. He never hoped J.R. would visit London let alone spend the day with him and his mother. Being with both of them, seeing them get along so well was fulfilling the only thing he ever wished for … for them to be a family again.

The waiter guided them to a table back by the open kitchen where the chefs prepared meals in plain sight. John Ross quickly stepped to Sue Ellen's side, taking the chair next to her, hoping his father would take the chair opposite. Unnoticed, he picked up on a look that passed between them before they sat down and realized it might not be as hard to get them to reconnect as he thought.

"While you're deciding," the waiter asked as he handed them menus, "what would you like to drink?"

"Iced tea, please," Sue Ellen replied.

"Same for me," said John Ross.

"Make it three," J.R. nodded. Then he looked over at the bar. "Say, young man, is that a collection of tequila I see over there?"

"Yes, sir," the waiter replied, "the best in Europe. Would you like something?"

"Only if you've got Chinaco Anejo."

The waiter was impressed. "Yes, we do. Excellent choice."

"One shot then, before the ice tea."

"Yes sir," the waiter said with a grin and hurried off.

"How come your not drinking bourbon 'n branch, Dad?"

"It's a little early yet, son," J.R. said with a grin as he looked over at John Ross. "But there is somethin' special about tequila. It reminds me of the wildcattin' days with your Grandaddy."

J.R.'s mind flashed back to his childhood and being out in the oil fields with Jock … the way it felt when the oil first came up out of a new well and turned everything black … how the fresh crude smelled on his clothes, hands and face. Those days were long gone … the environmentalists put a stop to letting gushers spray a long time ago. Plus it was too damn expensive to lose that much oil, let alone clean it up. But damn, what a feeling that was, being covered in crude and standing at the side of his proud father.

Sue Ellen watched as J.R.'s expression softened with his mental images, fascinated by the joy she saw in his eyes. Jock was a hero to many especially to his oldest son.

"Can I have a tequila, too, Dad?"

John Ross's question brought J.R. back to reality with a laugh, his blue eyes sparkling with humor. He exchanged a knowing looking with Sue Ellen and she shook her head even as she smiled.

"In about 10 years," she replied to John Ross with mock strictness.

"And I will be there to pour your first, I promise," J.R. added. "We'll take a bottle out to Ewing One and toast your grandaddy. But always remember to be careful with tequila, son. Drink only the best or else it will leave you with a headache for days."

"Speaking of headaches, how's yours," Sue Ellen asked J.R.

"After all that water you force-fed me at the soccer game, I feel like the inside of the Southfork swimmin' pool."

"But it worked, didn't it?"

J.R. slowly grinned. "Yes. I feel much better. And I'm starvin'! What's good to eat in this place, John Ross?"

John Ross sat up a little straighter, so proud that his daddy had asked for his opinion once again.

"I like the Southern Fried Steak. Reminds me of Grandma's cooking."

"Then I'm all for that, son." J.R. looked over at Sue Ellen. She and John Ross were the only connection back to his mother and Southfork at the moment. "Know what I miss most 'bout home?"

Sue Ellen smiled and nodded. "Mmm-hmmm, your mamma's chili."

"Yes, I do," J.R. replied with a laugh. Sue Ellen knew him so well.

The pleasure of being with his family again swept away the remaining traces of the last few rotten years J.R. had finally escaped from. To hell with Paris. He was going to be spending quite a bit more time in London from now on, whether Sue Ellen … or her husband … liked it or not.


	12. Part 12

LONDON RAIN, Part 12

The conversation over lunch turned out to be an entertaining exchange between J.R. and John Ross. Sue Ellen, content to just sit back and listen, enjoyed their banter especially because how happy it made their son. Perhaps her decision to invite J.R. to spend the afternoon with them had been a good one. It seemed to be soothing much of the anger John Ross had internalized the past year.

"That's the best food I've eaten in months," J.R. remarked as he pushed his plate away. "And the iced tea … I could'a sworn Teresa was here makin' it."

"It's one of my favorite things about this place," Sue Ellen nodded.

"I see you still have the appetite of a bird."

Sue Ellen smiled at the familiarity of the comment then looked over at John Ross, trying to deflect J.R.'s attention. "John Ross, why don't you tell your daddy about the paper you wrote about this place?"

"About the restaurant?" J.R. was genuinely intrigued.

"Well, not the restaurant exactly," John Ross replied. "The real Texas Embassy. Did you know one really existed?"

"Hmmm, let's see," J.R. said, thinking back through his history classes. "Did it have somethin' to do with the Republic of Texas?"

"Right, Dad!" John Ross grinned, impressed by his father's knowledge. "When Texas was separate from the United States and Mexico, back in 1836."

"Well, tell me all about it, son!"

Sue Ellen stifled a laugh, still amused at J.R.'s Texas Pride even after so many years. She had no doubt that if someone came up and asked if he was an American, he would quickly reply he was a Texan.

"Well, the real Texas Embassy was set up by the Republic and England offered to defend Texas so it would stay an independent country," John Ross recited. "But the Embassy closed in 1845 when Texas joined the United States. It was actually in a building over on St. James Street but this building is cool because this where the offices of the White Star Line were. You know, the owners of the Titanic? The survivors lists were posted here after it sank."

"Is that a fact?" J.R. said with a grin.

"Yes, sir. Would you like to read my paper about the Embassy sometime?"

"Sure! Next time I'm at your house, you let me see it."

"Cool!" John Ross nodded.

"Sounds like you are doin' great in school, John Ross. That makes me real happy."

John Ross looked at J.R. for a moment then looked down, suddenly unsure of what to do next. He knew what he wanted to say … he had been thinking about it since last night … but couldn't find the right words.

Puzzled by his son's apparent mood change, J.R. studied the boy. "John Ross, you all right?"

"Dad, there's something I need to tell you." John Ross finally looked up at him. "I'm sorry, about messing up at school back in Dallas. And for leaving Southfork without telling you."

J.R. was both impressed by the maturity of the comment and moved by the love and pride he felt for his son at the moment.

"It takes a big man to admit his mistakes, son," he quietly replied after a moment, a sincere smile gracing his expression. "Apology accepted." J.R. held out his hand and John Ross took it then they shook on the apology. "And I'm sorry for givin' you reason to leave," J.R. added. "You know, I was wrong for lettin' anything come between us. But I promise that won't ever happen again."

"Okay … apology accepted." John Ross extended his hand the way J.R. had and they shook again.

J.R. softly laughed as John Ross released his hand then sat back in his chair, proudly grinning at both his father and mother who, for a reason he couldn't understand, had tears in her eyes.

"I'm proud of you, son," J.R. beamed. "Damn proud."

Sue Ellen could have sworn she heard Jock Ewing's voice just then. When J.R. looked over at her, the sudden eye contact momentarily electrified them both. She smiled and put her hand on his, silently relaying how much his exchange with their son had pleased her.

J.R. turned his hand over and wrapped her hand in his. To her surprise, he gently squeezed it, increasing the contact. He was equally surprised when she didn't pull away. She looked over at John Ross and put her other arm around him, pulling him close for a quick kiss against his temple.

Being linked together, the familial bond between them seemed restored, strengthened. John Ross continued to smile, still thrilled about his conversation with his father plus the interaction he was witnessing between his parents. He suddenly realized that seeing moments like this between them made all their fighting a lot less scary. Now if he could just find a way for them to have more moments like this.

Sue Ellen gently pulled away from both and looked at her watch. "Well, you two … are we ready to go?"

"Mamma, can I go to the Mercado first? I wanna see if they have any new sweatshirts."

"This close to Christmas? I don't think so."

"Aww, Mom … c'mon. Please? I just wanna look."

Sue Ellen looked over at J.R. "Would you mind if we stayed a little longer?"

"Not at all. I don't have any plans."

Sue Ellen looked back at her son. "Okay. But just to look, remember?"

"I will," John Ross grinned.

"Wait a minute, John Ross," J.R. said as he quickly reached into his pocket and withdrew his money clip. He took off the top bill, which was a one hundred pound note, and handed it to his son. "Since this is my first time here, how 'bout buying me somethin'? And somethin' for you and your mamma, too?"

John Ross looked at the money then over at his mother. She smiled and nodded.

"I can't argue with that. Go ahead."

"Thanks, Dad!" His grin was contagious, transferring to both his mother and father.

"Damn, he's a great boy," J.R. remarked proudly as he watched John Ross walk off towards the stairs.

"Yes, he is," Sue Ellen nodded in agreement. "Being with you last night and today, having your complete attention … I can tell it's meant a lot to him, J.R. I haven't seen him this happy in months."

J.R. looked away for a moment, mentally kicking himself for giving up his son so easily in the first place. Then he looked back at Sue Ellen.

"Does he get along with Lockwood?"

"Sometimes. I think he's been missing you too much to let another man in."

"Well, I've missed him, too. More than I realized."

Sue Ellen was relieved to hear the regret in voice. Whatever the reason, J.R. was acknowledging just how important John Ross was and it pleased her.

"I still can't believe he just up and left Dallas like that," J.R. added. "He must've planned it for weeks."

"I'm just glad you let him stay."

"Makin' him come home would have made it worse." J.R. watched as Sue Ellen simply nodded in agreement. "Did you know he was leavin' Southfork for good?"

"No. I didn't know he wanted to stay with me until he got here." She paused. "J.R., the news that James was your son devastated him." It hadn't been easy for her, either, learning J.R. shared the bond of a child with another woman. Two women, if the rumors about Cally being pregnant were true. "He felt … replaced."

"I know. And I handled it all wrong." Then he stopped, finding it difficult to continue. Sitting across from Sue Ellen, getting along with her so well, the entire James and Vanessa incident suddenly felt like a huge betrayal to her. Too bad that hadn't occurred to him at the time. "God, what a mess."

"It's not like you to be so careless."

J.R. nodded. "I know. And that's what bothers me. Somethin' just isn't right with James. He has no Ewing characteristics. He doesn't even have any Southworth characteristics like Bobby and Garry."

"Are you telling me you didn't have a paternity test?" Sue Ellen asked, trying to withhold her sudden anger.

Her tone was icy and J.R. knew it related back to the time when John Ross' paternity was in question. He said nothing more, knowing he had verbally backed himself into a corner with her yet again.

"No questions asked, just acceptance?" She wondered aloud. Still he said nothing. "You just took Vanessa's word for it. Any woman's word was always better than mine."

"Sue Ellen, that's not true. That whole situation when you were pregnant with John Ross … when he was born … it haunts me to this day, honey. I lost so much time with him. Damn it, I almost lost you both! I don't want to ever go through that again."

It was the first time he had ever admitted any remorse for what had happened back then yet it seemed so hollow to Sue Ellen now. He had put her through hell when the question of John Ross' paternity had come up. Why had Vanessa Beaumont's word been given preferential treatment? Pulling her emotions under control once again, Sue Ellen sat back in her chair and folded her arms, observing him with a cool, indifferent stare.

"Well, Vanessa's word must be sacred. There is no way she could have misled you, is there?" J.R. remained silent. "Tell me, J.R.," she continued, the sarcasm in her razor sharp. "How was it, having the 'love of your life' come to Dallas to find you?"

"Where the hell did that come from?" J.R. was honestly surprised to hear that title given away by Sue Ellen. Yes, he had said those words to Vanessa but only because the woman who truly owned the title had deserted him for a life in London with another man.

"Your son. He had a front row seat for the entire spectacle, remember?"

"Oh, wonderful." J.R. closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. He could feel his headache returning.

"From what I've heard about the lady, she never could make up her mind about you, could she?" Sue Ellen's voice was deceptively sweet but her words continued to cut like a razorblade. "You practically even got her to marry you. What a dream come true that would've been. Too bad she ran off."

J.R. looked back at her, his expression tight. "You keepin' tabs on me, honey?"

"No. Merely curious."

"How nice to know you care."

"Come on, J.R." She rested her arms on the table in front of her then leaned closer to him, deliberately taking a flirty, playful position that brought her closer to him. "Tell me all about Vanessa."

Unknown to both of them, John Ross watched from a secluded spot on the top floor. He grinned, seeing his mother move closer to his father, then returned to the gift shop, happy his plan was working.

His father, on the other hand, was markedly unhappy. J.R. returned Sue Ellen's steady gaze, a flash of irritation and temper in his eyes.

"Sue Ellen, not that it is any of your business, especially since you ran off to London and married Lockwood. But you seem to already know an awful lot about Vanessa and me so why don't you just stop dancin' around and admit you're jealous."

"Jealous? Of Vanessa?" Sue Ellen mockingly laughed out loud. "Oh no, I know my place. I could never compete with the one great love of J.R. Ewing's life." Her sarcastic inflection felt like a knife in the pit of his stomach. "I am curious about why she dumped you, though. I mean, after such a long-awaited family reunion?"

"Wait a second," he quickly interrupted, "who said anything about her dumpin' me? Did you ever stop to think I might have dumped her?" Sue Ellen sat back once more and coolly surveyed him. J.R. realized he had nowhere else to go and surrendered. "All right, she dumped me. But she did me a favor." His tone became wistful, almost disappointed. "She wasn't the woman I remembered … idealized." He paused, looking at Sue Ellen once more. "You happy now?"

"My, my, my. You were a busy boy after I left Dallas. Women and children everywhere."

"Except for the woman and child I wanted." The intensity in both his voice and steel blue gaze finally silenced her. There was no doubt he was referring to her. "Now, is this inquisition about my love life over with?"

"Almost," she quietly replied, the sarcastic tone now gone. "What about Cally's baby, J.R.? And, more importantly, does John Ross know because I don't think he can take much more after what happened with James."

The directness of the question made J.R. flinch. Why did he ever think he could hide anything from her? She knew more about him than anyone else and a lie now would do more harm than good.

"No, he doesn't know. Not many people do." He paused. "How did you find out?"

"Cally called me right after she left Dallas. She told me she was pregnant. I just guessed it was yours."

"I don't know if it is or not." He was clearly aggravated. It seemed all the women he knew were conspiring against him. "What the hell did she call you for, anyway?"

"I'm still not sure," Sue Ellen shrugged. "She said she wanted me to know you were free again. Did she think there was something going on between us?"

"Who knows," J.R. sighed heavily and shook his head. "I will never, for as long as I live, understand women."

"Oh, I think you do pretty well."

"Why didn't you come home after you talked to her?" He heatedly replied. "If you had been in Dallas, it's for damn sure a lot of the mess I got myself into wouldn't have happened."

Sue Ellen was surprised he had turned the results back on her but she held back, knowing she had pushed him far enough. It was time to stop the conversation from escalating. Besides, J.R.'s statement had actually gratified her, hearing that he valued her in his life, even if in a small way. She relaxed and slowly smiled at him.

"Why? I could never keep you out of trouble before."

J.R. immediately sensed she was no longer going to provoke him and relaxed. "Well, darlin', for good or bad, you were my anchor. I still can't believe some of the stupid stuff I got into when you left."

"You mean more than your usual stupid stuff?"

J.R. sat back and stared at her, unsure whether to laugh or glare at her. "You have seen me at worst, haven't you?"

"And your best. I love watching you with John Ross. It was sweet last night, seeing you sleeping side by side."

"Aww, hell," he replied with an awkward smile. He looked away from her and fingered his napkin, uncomfortable at being caught at such a vulnerable moment. "He fell asleep as we were talkin'. I just figured it might be my last chance to be near him like that. He's growin' up so fast."

"Yes, he is. I can see a change in him almost daily." Sue Ellen found herself charmed by J.R.'s reaction. If he had an emotional Achilles heel, it was his son.

"Damn, where has the time gone? Seems like he was just a baby." J.R. looked out across the restaurant, staring at nothing, a pensive frown clouding his expression. It was time to tell her the truth about Cally and the baby. "When Cally left, I swear to you, I didn't even know if her baby was mine. She said it wasn't. That's part of the reason I've kept my distance from her." He looked back at Sue Ellen. "I'm just grateful John Ross is well and truly mine."

Sue Ellen watched him for a moment, conflicted by the way the man in front of her could still both anger and enchant her all at the same time.

"J.R., you can be so damn secretive with your feelings," she finally said. "Like sharing them would break some macho Texas creed. Yet you're not like that with John Ross. For that, I'm grateful. It's a nice change."

The observation was incredibly insightful but made J.R. uncomfortable. He had always longed to share his feelings with Sue Ellen yet it felt like any revelation would show weakness, leaving him open to attack. Just like now.

"Hell, I ain't tryin' to change nothin'," J.R. boldly announced. "What you never understood is I have my good moments and I have my bad moments, Sue Ellen. John Ross is part of my good moments. You just choose to remember the bad."

"Oh, no," Sue Ellen said, amused his sarcastic comment had just proven her point about him hiding his feelings. "I remember everything about you. Your bad moments are terrible and your good moments are few and far between," she teased.

"You ain't Little Miss Perfect yourself, darlin'," J.R. quickly tossed back at her.

"And wouldn't it be incredibly boring if I was?"

"Well, the same goes for me." He slowly grinned. "It's why you've never been able to resist me."

The arrogant, sarcastic remark made Sue Ellen laugh out loud, which thrilled J.R. and John Ross, who had just returned to the table.

"Dad! Mom! I found some great shirts!" He quickly pulled one of the shirts out of the plastic bag he was carrying and held it up. It was a long-sleeve rugby shirt made up of solid blocks of red, white, and blue, resembling the Texas state flag, with the Texas Embassy Cantina logo on the right side. "I got one for each of us."

John Ross passed out the shirts and J.R. chuckled as he held up the shirt against his chest.

"John Ross, do you remember what these colors mean, son?"

"Yes, sir! Don't mess with Texas!"

All three laughed. Sue Ellen was charmed once again by both father and son. Little did she know her handsome, seemingly happy family had also enchanted nearby diners and members of the serving staff.


	13. Part 13

LONDON RAIN, Part 13

The late afternoon sun was casting shadows across the Lockwood living room when a key rattled in the front door. Sue Ellen entered, followed by John Ross and J.R.

"J.R., you sure about this?" Sue Ellen said as she closed the door and looked over at her ex-husband.

"You just go and have a good time," he replied then looked down at John Ross and placed his hand on the boy's shoulder. "It'll give me and John Ross a chance to spend some more time together. Right, bud?"

John Ross grinned up at his father. "Yeah! Plus I won't have to go over to Ben's house." He rolled his eyes. "Mom still thinks I need a baby sitter."

"I do not," Sue Ellen said with a smile. "I'm just not sure how long I'll be and don't want you alone late at night."

"Your mamma has a point, son," J.R. added.

"Besides," Sue Ellen added, "I thought you liked staying at Ben's house?

"Well … yeah, I do." John Ross thought about it for a moment, then looked up at his mother and father and smiled again. "But I like being with you and Dad a whole lot better."

J.R. chuckled and hugged John Ross to his side. "Me too, son."

"Well, if I hadn't promised Don I'd go to this charity auction …" Sue Ellen stopped and looked at J.R., suddenly feeling the need to explain herself. "It's for a good cause. The Institute of Child Health."

"With lots of wealthy wannabe moviemakers in the crowd, no doubt."

Sue Ellen glared at him, aggravated by his sarcastic assumption but even more so because he was partially right.

John Ross diverted their attention. "Dad, wanna play a video game with me?"

J.R. looked back down at his son and smiled, relieved Sue Ellen had been denied the chance to verbally lacerate him for the comment but somewhat disappointed she hadn't. It just occurred to him how much he still loved to see her get all worked up.

"Sure!" J.R. said to John Ross. "But you'll have to show me how."

"I will. Come on, let's go to my room."

John Ross grabbed his father's arm and began to lead him off. J.R. looked over at Sue Ellen, silently pleading for help, but she just grinned and waved, knowing he was about to get what was coming to him.

"Good luck," she called out then quietly added, "you're gonna need it."

"Gee, thanks," J.R. replied before disappearing down the hall with his son.

-

J.R. sat next to John Ross on the edge of the bed. After nearly thirty minutes of instruction and game play, he was becoming fairly good at handling the video game paddle. His mind was on business, though, and he was having a difficult time concentrating.

"Listen, son," J.R. said as he sat down the paddle when the latest space alien level ended. "I need to make a quick phone call. Mind if we hit 'pause' for a minute?"

"Okay," John Ross replied and hit the button.

"Where's your phone?"

"You can use the one in the den. It's right down the hall, next to the living room."

J.R. stood up and stretched. He would have never guessed that battling imaginary aliens could make his muscles so tense.

"Hurry back, Dad." John Ross added. "The next level is the best!"

"I won't be long," J.R. remarked as he headed for the door.

Once in the hall, he waited for any sign or sound from Sue Ellen but finding the house quiet, he walked down the hall to the den and entered. It was an impressive room made up of deep woods and leathers with two walls of bookcases full of notable volumes. There were also pictures on several shelves. He stopped to look at them, smiling at a picture of Sue Ellen and John Ross together but then glared at a photo of them together with Lockwood. He turned and walked over to the desk and picked up the phone.

After phoning his hotel to arrange for a car, J.R. accessed the international carrier. He entered his calling card number and dialed the number in Dallas that would connect him to his detective.

"It's J.R. here," he quietly said, hoping not to be overheard. "You got anything new for me?"

Ratagan smiled on the other end. "Yes, it's bad news ... for Lockwood. His company is heavily in debt and it's growing daily because of the high interest rates he volunteered for. Seems his last two films came in way over budget and no studio would take on his new project."

"Well, Alfred Hitchcock he ain't. Even I know that."

"But that's the least of his problems, J.R. He tried to finance it himself and now his investors are really squeezing him for repayment. He's dead in the water because the film isn't done and he's out of money again."

"Is that what he's workin' on in New York, keepin' him away from home?"

"I don't know yet. Could be he's hiding out 'till he finds some cash."

J.R. grinned. "Well then just let him hide 'cause it will give me more time with my wife and son and leave his company wide open for a takeover. Do you know what bank was stupid enough to give him his last batch of cash?"

"That's just it, he didn't use a bank. Lockwood called in some personal connections to arrange for 'independent investors' to back him when the studios wouldn't. He put Lockwood Entertainment and its holdings up for collateral."

"Did he, now? You sayin' what I think you're sayin' about 'independent investors'?"

"Yes, sir." Ratagan smugly replied.

Both men knew there was no need for further explanation. J.R. was both delighted at the prospect of how stupid Lockwood was to take a loan from organized crime yet appalled it could make Sue Ellen and John Ross possible targets if he defaulted. That thought sobered his mood.

"Listen here." The seriousness of J.R.'s tone made his detective snap to attention. "You put your boys over here to work, double-time if necessary, and find out exactly who's holdin' his marker and how much it will take to buy it out. I don't want there to be any chance of him defaultin'."

"Already got it, J.R. He owes half a million dollars and I was told paying it off won't be a problem."

"Then whatever it takes, you set it up for me."

"Yes, sir."

"And you call me just as soon as you know anything, day or night. By the way, Ratagan … excellent work. You can count on a nice, big bonus for this."

J.R. hung up the phone, enjoying the feeling that his plan was falling into place. Lockwood had made that too easy. Plus arranging his downfall in his own office made it that much sweeter. It would serve him right for not staying home to look after his assets.

"J.R.?" Sue Ellen's voice came from out in the hall.

"In the den, darlin'."

After a moment, Sue Ellen appeared at the door, leaving J.R. momentarily speechless. Her hair and makeup were perfect and the black, tailored suit flattered and accentuated every curve and line of her body. She looked so sophisticated, so sexy, and made the flock of runway models in Paris pale in comparison.

"You look beautiful," he said softly.

"Thank you." Sue Ellen smiled at his approval even if it was coming from her exasperating ex-husband. She knew she looked good but seeing J.R.'s reaction had made the extra time she spent getting ready worth it. It had been a while since a man had admired her. "What are you doing in here?"

"I needed to make a phone call. John Ross told me to come in here." He smiled at her. "Don't worry, I used my calling card."

"Oh, good. I won't have to send you a bill then." Sue Ellen softly laughed.

"You probably would." J.R. visually took in everything about her then looked back into her eyes, holding her gaze. "I'm glad the animosity is finally gone between us, Sue Ellen."

She shrugged. "It was time. Plus it's much easier on John Ross when we get along. But J.R., I'm warning you," she said, her tone turning serious. "I haven't forgotten anything. You won't be able to get away with a damn thing anymore so don't even try."

He simply gave her his most charming grin. If only she knew, J.R. thought. Then his eyes fell on a double picture frame that sat on the edge of the desk. It contained black and white photos of John Ross and Sue Ellen. He reached over and picked it up, enjoying what he saw. On the left was John Ross in full cowboy gear complete with hat and sitting near a saddle. On the right, Sue Ellen wore a black leather jacket and big silver hoop earrings. It was when her dark hair was still long, the way she wore it the day she left him alone in that theater in Dallas. Such an enticing pose highlighted by those big, beautiful eyes. Damn, she was beautiful.

"Nice photos," J.R. remarked.

Sue Ellen smiled and approached him, looking over his arm at the photos. "Especially of John Ross."

J.R. looked over at her. "Especially of his mamma."

"We had them taken shortly after he got here," Sue Ellen remarked, deflecting his comment. "There is one of Don, too, but he refuses to display it."

"That's a relief."

Sue Ellen playfully slapped his arm and J.R. winced as he sat the picture frame down. When he turned his attention back on Sue Ellen, she self-consciously took a step backwards.

"You sure Lockwood won't mind if I drop in to see my son from now on? 'Cause I plan to be around here a lot more often."

"How can he mind when he's rarely here?" As soon as she said it, Sue Ellen desperately wished she could take it back.

J.R. studied her. "Is he always leavin' you two alone?"

Too often, she thought. "He has projects that take him all over the world," Sue Ellen tried to casually reply with an indifferent shrug of her shoulders.

"That's just not right. He should be here for you … for the both of you. Hell, you could move back to Dallas and at least be by your family. Let him visit you there."

"You mean _your_ family. And what exactly would I do with _your_ family while you are in Paris?"

"If you and John Ross were in Dallas, I'd just have to go home, wouldn't I?"

His grin was incorrigible yet in a way his offer was tempting. She did miss having family nearby.

J.R. closely watched as Sue Ellen contemplated the offer. "Mind if I make a personal observation?"

"Would it stop you if I did?"

"Lockwood isn't payin' enough attention to you, is he?"

Irritated by the blunt comment, Sue Ellen looked away, deliberately ignoring him.

J.R. had his answer. Wanting to find out just how badly Lockwood was neglecting her, he suddenly had the urge to kiss her. Maybe it would also give him a gauge as to what kind of future he might have with her, something he now longed for after being with her and John Ross the past two days.

He stepped closer but Sue Ellen took a step back, trying to avoid him, knowing full well what his intentions were. But the edge of the large desk was suddenly against the back of her thighs and she had nowhere to go.

J.R. reached out and gently framed her face with his hands then lightly ran his thumb over her bottom lip. The touch startled her, making her unintentionally jump, and she looked up at him. His smile was warm and gentle but the quicksilver blue of his eyes was unsettling. She knew the look only too well … he wanted her and she wasn't sure she could resist him.

Her eyes darted from his gaze to his bottom lip then back to his eyes. The thought of how badly she wanted to kiss him, be kissed by him, was both as terrifying and electric as the intimate caress of his thumb against her lip had been. A kiss never seemed to be enough for them, though. Where was this heading? Where did she want it to go?

As he always seemed to do, J.R. read her mind and leaned down, brushing his lips against hers, teasing her, testing her. Wanting her to set the pace, he waited until her lips finally moved against his. Just as he had hoped, she was soon kissing him. He deepened the kiss, opening his mouth to hers, bringing her even closer against him in the process.

Sue Ellen had nearly forgotten how much she loved the way he kissed, especially this way, with his mouth molded perfectly to hers in the slow, seductive way he excelled at. He always had the ability to effortlessly pull her under his spell with just a kiss, slipping through every defense she had against him with the ease of the modern-day pirate he was, stealing anything he wanted … her body, her heart, her soul. And it was shocking how willingly she wanted him to take it all, basking in this long-forbidden pleasure she suddenly craved.

"Mom? You still here?" The voice of John Ross from the hallway shattered the spell the kiss had pulled them into.

Sue Ellen broke the kiss, her breath quickly escaping against J.R.'s mouth both in surprise and frustration. J.R. pulled back to look at her. The slightly dazed and sated darkness of her eyes exhilarated him. It was the sweetest torture he had ever known. His body yearned to be with hers … but not now. Not while she still belonged to Lockwood. J.R. needed her to be his completely when she came to him. And she would. He knew that now and could wait until it happened.

"She is, son. We're in the den," J.R. answered back, the low timbre of his voice betraying the fact the kiss had affected him just as much as it had her. He took a deep breath, trying to clear his mind, a trace of amusement now sparkling in his blue eyes.

Sue Ellen quickly pulled away from J.R., wanting to avoid John Ross seeing them so close. But his appearance at the door happened too fast and he was just in time to see his father's hands drop from his mother's face.

"So … what's happening?" The smile John Ross flashed them was identical to the mischievous one now lighting his father's face.

"Just kissin' your mamma," J.R. casually remarked as if he was relaying the Dallas Cowboy scores.

"J.R.!" Sue Ellen cried out in both shock and embarrassment. J.R. grinned at her, amused by her reaction, and it infuriated her.

"Mom, it's okay," John Ross said, soothing her with his most charming smile. "I think it's cool. Much better than you two fighting. Besides," he added, trying not to laugh, "Dad doesn't usually wear lipstick."

J.R. looked blankly at his son for a split second then laughed, quickly raising his hand to his mouth, smearing some of the lipstick smudge onto his finger but leaving more than he removed. He looked over at Sue Ellen, who couldn't help but be amused … and slightly aroused … by the mark she had left on him.

"Oh, good grief," she said with mock irritation. She reached into the left side of J.R.'s jacket, knowing she would find a handkerchief there, and blotted the cloth over his lips. When her eyes met his, she froze, suddenly realizing how close they were again. She stepped back and handed J.R. the handkerchief.

"Thank you, darlin'," he replied as he wiped the remaining color off his lips.

"Umm, Mom," John Ross quietly interjected, almost forgetting why he had searched for his mother in the first place. "What I came in here to tell you was … Don just pulled up front in a cab."

From the living room came the sound of the door opening and someone entering followed by a heavy thud of something being dropped to the floor. The warmth Sue Ellen had just felt from J.R.'s kiss was instantaneously replaced with dread, leaving her cold and shivering.

"Sue Ellen, luv," the distinctively British voice rang out. "Are you home?"

"Damn it," Sue Ellen whispered. Unable to look at either John Ross or J.R., she quickly maneuvered around them and headed for the hall, secretly wondering if this day could be any more complicated.

J.R. and John Ross watched her leave then turned back to each other. They both stifled laughs then perfectly executed the American male tradition of "high-fives" before heading for the hall. J.R. followed John Ross but before he went through the door, he stopped and looked back at the dual photos of Sue Ellen and John Ross sitting on the desk. Without a second thought, he went back and picked up the frame then closed it and slipped it into his jacket pocket.


	14. Part 14

LONDON RAIN, Part 14

Don Lockwood stepped into his living room and dropped the heavy leather duffel bag he had dealt with since leaving Heathrow. Between it and the overnight flight from New York, he was exhausted and it felt good to be home at last.

"Sue Ellen, luv? Are you home?"

Don paused as he shut the door behind him, waiting for an answer, and soon saw his wife come out of the den into the hall. He smiled. She looked lovely in the rather formal black outfit he had bought her to attend the charity auction scheduled for tonight.

"Hello, luv," Sue Ellen replied with a smile as she entered the living room. "This is surprise. You should have told me you were coming home. I would have picked you up at the airport."

"No need," Don said as he gladly accepted a kiss on the cheek from his wife. "I knew you were attending the charity auction tonight and didn't want to interrupt your plans."

"What made you decide to leave New York early?"

"I don't know. Just a feeling I had. You didn't seem quite yourself on the phone last night."

Unknown to Don, Sue Ellen was nervous, still shaken by the kiss she had just shared with J.R. and unsure how to announce his presence before he arrived in the living room. The decision was quickly taken from her control, though, as Don spied the black Stetson hanging from the antique roman statue near the hallway.

"Oh my God. J.R. is here, isn't he?" The anger in Don's eyes quickly doused Sue Ellen's anxiety and replaced it with stubborn determination. She could tell he was about to lecture her and she was more than ready for it. His open contempt for J.R. had been a problem they had often faced since John Ross had come to live with them.

"Yes, he is," she nodded. "He spent the day with his son."

"How nice." The sarcastic indignation in Don's voice only made Sue Ellen more irritated. "It's all starting to make sense now. Was his visit by invitation?"

"No. But I won't keep him from his son, Don."

"Why didn't you tell me he was here when I called last night? I need to be here when he visits."

"Maybe so. But you weren't here, as usual … were you?" Her anger was beginning to resonate in her voice. "Perhaps you should trust my judgment instead."

"Where J.R. is concerned? Not bloody likely."

John Ross exited the den and J.R. soon followed. When J.R. noticed Sue Ellen standing as still as a statue, glaring at her husband, he stopped where he was, knowing from his ex-wife's body language she was engaged in a heated discussion.

When Don looked over at him, J.R. nodded his head. "Lockwood."

Don ignored the greeting and looked at John Ross. "Hello, John Ross," he said, trying to smile.

"Hello," John Ross quietly replied then looked over at his mother. "Mom, is everything okay?"

"Just fine, sweetheart," she said reassuringly. "How about going to your room for me? I'll be there in just a minute."

"Sure." John Ross looked over at J.R. "Wanna come with me, Dad?"

J.R. looked down at his son and smiled. "Actually, John Ross, I think it's time I was headin' back to the hotel. Looks like your mamma has a few things she wants to discuss with her, uh, husband."

"J.R.," Sue Ellen said as she turned to him, "would you mind if John Ross stayed with you tonight?"

"Not at all," J.R. replied. "I'd like that."

"Cool!" John Ross said with a grin.

"Sue Ellen, I don't think that's a wise choice," Don added. "The boy should stay here with us."

Sue Ellen heard J.R.'s breath catch and knew he was furious. The entire situation was deteriorating and she realized she had to do something before it slipped out of her control. But J.R. responded too quickly, only adding fuel to the fire of her husband's temper.

"Lockwood," J.R. smugly remarked, "if you've gotta problem with me then just spit it out."

"I wouldn't know where to start!" Don angrily replied. "So how about if you just get the hell out of my house and we'll leave it at that."

"Don!" Sue Ellen was surprised by his rude remark.

"No. It's all right, Sue Ellen," J.R. said as he reached over and removed his hat from the statue. It was taking everything he had not to lose his temper but he wouldn't let that happen, not in front of John Ross. Besides, he would exact his revenge on Lockwood soon enough. The takeover of his company just became one hell of an acquisition. "John Ross, how 'bout throwin' a few things in a bag and I'll meet you outside?"

"I'm already packed, Dad, 'cause I thought I was staying with Ben tonight. I'll be right back." He said over his shoulder as he ran down the hall to his room.

"I'll drive you to the hotel," Sue Ellen quietly said to J.R., making Don even angrier.

"No need," J.R. replied. "I was gonna take John Ross out to dinner. My driver should be here by now."

The silence that fell over the living room was uncomfortable. J.R. walked over and picked his coat up off the couch and slipped it on, trying to avoid any further eye contact with Lockwood. He wasn't sure how much longer he could keep quiet.

"By the way, J.R.," Don added, taking the chance to make his long-awaited announcement. "I have some good news for you. You're about to become a celebrity."

"What the hell are you talkin' about?" J.R. tightly replied, still trying to avoid looking at the man.

"Sue Ellen's movie. I'm about to sign a very substantial distribution deal for it in New York. If all goes well, it should be in Dallas within a month."

"You _what_!" Sue Ellen furiously interjected.

J.R. glared at her, angry that she had lied to him about the film's destruction. The image of how Miss Ellie was going to react when she saw the film quickly resurfaced in his mind. It was the same nightmare he had fought off since Sue Ellen first showed him the damn thing.

"I destroyed the film and its negative months ago," Sue Ellen said to both men, trying to dispel Don's lie and reassure J.R. she had told the truth.

"I know you did," Don smirked. "But you didn't destroy the director's cut."

"You had no right to keep a copy," Sue Ellen angrily replied.

"I had every right. It was my film." Lockwood looked over at J.R. "Besides, I knew he would eventually show up here, trying to insert himself into your life again."

Sue Ellen glanced over at J.R., worried about how quiet he was. She knew only too well that nothing good ever came from his angry silences.

"It is not _your_ film," Sue Ellen said as she glared back at her husband. "You have no legal right to the distribution and if it is released, you will open us up to lawsuits that would destroy us financially. Did you even consider that?"

"What, lawsuits from Ewing?" Don sneered at J.R. "No, I don't think so. He wouldn't dare."

"You just try me, boy." The icy, eerie quietness of J.R.'s tone sent a wave of dread through Sue Ellen.

"Don, you've got to stop this right now," Sue Ellen pleaded. "Please."

"Why?" Don angrily replied to her. "Don't tell me you're protecting him, Sue Ellen? Has he been giving you that same old line about how he's changed? Well, it's a lie, luv, just as it always has been. Do you know he's having me investigated again?" He looked directly at J.R. "Did you think my friends wouldn't tell me there were tecs about, trying to dig up information on me?"

"You're paranoid, Lockwood." J.R. sneered. "Why don't you just tell us what you're hidin' and get it out in the open."

Don doubled-up his fist and swung at J.R.'s jaw but he had telegraphed his move and J.R. dodged in time to miss the weight of the impact that would have sent him reeling. He caught enough of Lockwood's knuckles to make his lip bleed, though.

"Don, what is wrong with you?" Sue Ellen shouted as she stepped between the two men. "You either calm down or get the hell out of here!"

J.R. raised his hand to his mouth, wiping away the blood that was running down his chin then focused back on Lockwood with laser-like intensity. He usually didn't fight; he left that to baby brother Bobby and Ray. But this was different.

Sue Ellen knew Don was in trouble. Even before the thought had crossed J.R.'s mind to strike back and punch Lockwood, Sue Ellen anticipated his reaction and pushed her hand against his chest.

"J.R., don't! Please? Listen to me, don't let this escalate. Not in front of John Ross. Think of your son."

At the mention of John Ross, the rage inside J.R. lessened, leaving him shaken from the unanswered rush of adrenaline.

At J.R.'s side, where he had moved unnoticed to join his father, John Ross made a sound somewhere between a muffled cry of pain and a scream of anger.

"You leave my dad alone!" John Ross cried out as he lunged out at his stepfather, pushing against him with all his strength, making Don stumble back several steps.

As John Ross moved to go after Don again, J.R. quickly stepped around Sue Ellen and grabbed him, holding him tightly against his chest, pinning his arms against his side. Driven by blind rage, John Ross fought desperately to free himself, surprising J.R. at just how strong his son had become.

"John Ross! Calm down, son."

"LET ME GO!" John Ross screamed.

"No, son. Not 'til you calm down. C'mon now!"

Sue Ellen stepped in front of J.R. and bent down to comfort John Ross. She ran her fingers through his hair and stroked his face, wiping the angry tears from his eyes.

"John Ross, sweetheart. Please calm down. It's all right. It's gonna be all right."

At her words and touch, John Ross finally began to relax in J.R.'s arms. J.R. marveled at her; she always had been able to instantly soothe the boy. It reminded him of the quiet strength of his own mother. With that thought, J.R. finally released his son into her arms.

Sue Ellen held John Ross against her and continued to run her fingers through his hair. "You go ahead and go with your daddy," she smiled weakly. "You're gonna have a great time."

"C'mon, son," J.R. said as he placed his hand on John Ross' head. Let's get outta here. Some fresh air would do us both good."

"Mom, come with us," John Ross pleaded with her.

Sue Ellen smiled again but there were tears in her eyes. "I'll be fine, I promise." She bent down and kissed him on the forehead. "I'll see you first thing tomorrow morning."

"John Ross," J.R. added while giving Lockwood one of the coldest, angriest stares the man had ever seen, "take your bag out to the driver and wait for me in the car. I'll be right there, bud."

"Yes, sir." John Ross knew from the tone of his father's voice it was no time to argue. Plus he wanted to get as far away from his stepfather as soon as possible. He looked up at Sue Ellen. "I love you, Mamma."

"I love you too, sweetheart," Sue Ellen replied as she touched his cheek. "See you tomorrow."

John Ross refused to look at Don as he opened the door and exited, leaving it open on purpose. It felt so good after all the times Don had told him to shut the door behind him.

J.R. looked over at Sue Ellen. "Don't stay here with him."

"Oh, just leave already," Don muttered.

J.R. made a move toward Lockwood but Sue Ellen grabbed his arm. "J.R., listen to me …" J.R. stopped and looked back at her. "I'm going to be fine," Sue Ellen repeated. She wanted to reach up and touch the bloodied corner of J.R.'s mouth, kiss it and make them both feel better about what happened, but she simply smiled. "Look out for John Ross for me."

"You know I will," J.R. replied.

The way his wife looked at her ex-husband made Don's temper double then explode. "Ewing, get the hell out of here!"

J.R. escaped Sue Ellen's grip, moving with an unsuspected lightening stealth, and grabbed Don by the lapels of his leather jacket, pushing him against the wall with such force it knocked his breath out.

"You lay one finger on her," J.R. whispered in a deadly tone as he glared down at Lockwood, "and I'm comin' after you with everything I got."

Don finally remained silent. Still dazed, he was also greatly intimidated by the strength of the man that now towered above him. The rage inside him flickered out and died, replaced by guilt and fear as he realized he had underestimated J.R.

J.R. sensed Lockwood's surrender and released him with a push. He then looked over at Sue Ellen, expecting punishment but receiving an unexpected nod of approval. She stood defiantly before him, her arms folded across her chest, her previous distress now replaced with an indignant control of her emotions. The look on her face was so familiar to J.R.; she was obviously ready for a fight and it was time he stepped back and let her give Lockwood everything he deserved. A perceptive look passed between them then J.R. walked out of the open door and was gone.

Sue Ellen reached over and slammed the door. She stared at her husband, her aloof silence clearly broadcasting her displeasure.

Don knew he was in trouble. Facing her wrath for upsetting John Ross was going be terrible even though hurting the boy in any way had been the farthest thing from his mind when he lashed out at J.R. The realization of how badly he had reacted finally hit him, accompanied by a deep regret. That shame now stung deeper than the anger he had felt about finding J.R. in his house.

"Sue Ellen," Don sheepishly remarked, "I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what?" The frosty tone of her voice made him uneasy. "For acting like an ass or for eliminating me from the decision of when my film – a film that was clearly off limits – would be distributed? So much for us being a team."

"It's a great deal, Sue Ellen," he replied with a worried grin. "We're going to make a lot of money, luv."

"I don't give a damn!" Sue Ellen took a deep breath, trying to calm her anger. "It will be blood money, Don, taken from the emotional devastation of the Ewings including my son."

Hearing the Ewing name again made Don's anger flare back up. "Then you should have thought about that before you made it."

Sue Ellen blankly stared at him, unable to believe what she had just heard. "Well, I thought I had relied on a professional to handle it. I was obviously greatly mistaken." She paused, the gleam in her eye becoming resolute. "You're going to kill the distribution deal immediately."

"No, I'm not." He turned away from her and walked over to the bar to pour himself a much needed glass of gin. "When you come to your senses and stop talking like J.R. Ewing, we'll discuss it further."

"We'll discuss it right now!"

"You gave me full control of Lockwood Entertainment when you signed over your half of the company," he replied blandly and bolted the gin. "That included the film."

The implications hit Sue Ellen hard and she had to fight the physical sickness that overcame her.

"Now, if it makes you feel better," Don continued as he turned back to her, "I'll spend the night on the couch in the den. Perhaps by morning you will be calm enough to realize I did this for your benefit."

"For my benefit? Gee thanks," she scoffed. "And exactly how will I know the difference that you aren't in bed tonight?"

"Releasing the film is going to set you free of the Ewing influence once and for all, luv," he remarked, inwardly reeling from her sarcastic implication. "The sooner the better."

"The 'Ewing influence'. That's what this is all about, isn't it? It's why you haven't touched me in weeks. All because of that stupid nightmare I had."

"You didn't call out his name in your sleep like it was a nightmare!" Don shouted out then paused, trying to regain his composure. "Why do you think it bothers me so much, knowing he has been here behind my back?"

"How many times do I have to tell you," she said wearily, "J.R. is my past. He means nothing to me."

"Then why did you let him into our house?"

"Because John Ross needed him. More than I ever realized. I can't deny him access to his son." Her tone gentled. "Don, please. J.R. is broken right now. He has nothing and he's not a threat. Besides, he's been on his best behavior." She paused, searching for anything that might calm her husband's jealous temper. "What's the harm in him visiting John Ross? We both knew he would eventually."

"I thought it would be in Dallas, not here." He paused for a moment. "He's up to something, Sue Ellen. What other reason could he have for having me investigated again?"

"So what if he did? We have nothing to hide."

"You are not a good judge of his actions, luv," he replied defensively. "He has obviously cast a spell over you again."

"That doesn't speak very highly of your opinion of me."

"Not where he is concerned, no. You have obvious weaknesses he will exploit, given the chance."

"Obvious weaknesses?" Her tone was now ice cold, matching the stare she studied him with. "I will be exploited by no one, especially not J.R. Ewing."

"Well, then so be it. When the film is released, he will hopefully be out of our lives for good, anyway."

"So, you're still going through with the film's release?"

"You're damn right I am!"

"Then prepare yourself," she replied coolly. "You provoked a sleeping cobra tonight when you told him about the film then threw him into attack mode by assaulting him in front of his son. Believe me, his retribution won't be physical. It's going to be mental and emotional and you won't know it's coming until it happens."

Don scoffed at her concern. "Fine. Let him do his worst."

"Oh, he will." Sue Ellen looked at him as if seeing him for the first time. "And you will be the one with the 'obvious weaknesses'."

Don ignored her repeating his own words to him. "You will not see him again, Sue Ellen. And he will not come into this house. I forbid it."

Sue Ellen slowly shook her head, unable to comprehend the arrogance of her husband's statement especially because it was her house.

"You _forbid_ it?" She slowly smiled in a deadly serious way. "So, we finally come down to it, the usual male tactic of threatening and forbidding. My God, I find that incredibly boring."

She turned and walked to the coat closet and removed her coat and purse.

"Where do you think you're going?" Don asked.

"Anywhere but here. Or are you going to forbid that, too?"

She opened the front door and left Don standing in the silence of the living room.


	15. Part 15

LONDON RAIN, Part 15

After J.R. climbed into the back of the limousine and asked the driver to return to the hotel, John Ross anxiously looked over at him.

"What happened? Did you take care of Don? Does your mouth hurt much?"

"Whoa, son!" J.R. grinned as he shook the rain off his hat. "One thing at a time." He settled back into the seat and looked over at John Ross' anxious face. "Now, let's see … not much happened after you left. I said goodbye to your mamma, that's about it."

"And did you take care of Don?"

"Do you mean did I punch him?" John Ross eagerly nodded and J.R. shook his head. "No, 'cause the way he acted tonight, he humiliated himself more than I ever could."

"Well did it hurt when he punched you?" John Ross asked, a little disappointed from the last answer.

"I've had mosquito bites that hurt worse that this, son," J.R lied as he gingerly touched his lip. "Your step-daddy sure doesn't throw much of a punch. He could take a lesson or two from your mamma."

"Mamma?" John Ross dropped his brow into a confused frown.

J.R. stopped and looked over at John Ross. Of course he didn't know Sue Ellen had one hell of a right hook.

"Yes, indeed. Your refined, elegant mother throws quite a punch." J.R. paused as he recalled a time he had been on the receiving end of her fury. It was at the Oil Baron's Ball, the night she found out about Cally. Damn, she looked gorgeous that night, especially right after she had floored him. His slow, sensual grin at the memory was lost on his son. "But it was worth getting slugged just to see the flash of temper light up her eyes."

"You mean she slugged _you_?"

"She sure did!" J.R. said proudly. Then his voice dropped in mock humility. "But I deserved it, 'course."

"Wow!" John Ross exclaimed, very impressed by his mother's ability. "I can't imagine Mom hitting anybody."

"That's 'cause your mamma is a lady and always will be."

John Ross slyly looked over at his father and grinned. "Then it must take someone special to get her all worked up like that, huh?"

J.R. studied his son for a moment then grinned when he understood his meaning.

"Could be." They both laughed and J.R. reached over to playfully tousle John Ross' hair. "Thanks for comin' to my defense back there with Lockwood."

"Sure. I just wish we could've kicked his ..."

Suddenly embarrassed at the near slip, John Ross caught himself but J.R. understood. He knew only too well one of the first things a teenage boy learned to do was swear.

"What, kicked his ass?"

"Yeah," John Ross sighed in relief then giggled.

"Well, your mamma stopped me. And it's probably a good thing, too, 'cause I don't care much for brawlin'. I usually leave that to your uncles." J.R. paused and looked back at his son. "John Ross, if there is only one thing I can ever teach you, it would be to think before you fight. Study your enemy, learn his weaknesses then fight him with all you got. If you do, your chances of winnin' will double, I guarantee it. Besides, just look at your uncles. They come out with fists swingin' and hope for the best then end up with more cuts and bruises than anybody else. They always did prefer brawn over brains."

"I was in a couple of fights at school when I first got here," John Ross replied awkwardly, almost apologetically.

"Well, there's a time and a place for knockin' heads, too," J.R. answered with a smile, hoping to ease his son's discomfort. "You probably didn't have much choice, bein' the new kid around here, did ya'?

"No, sir."

"And how'd you do?"

John Ross finally looked back at his father and smiled. "I took care of them."

"That's my boy!" J.R. grinned. "But just keep in mind that sometimes, especially when you get older, you're gonna run into situations where a well-thought-out plan of attack and it's execution are much more satisfyin' than a fist fight." J.R. touched his lip again, thinking of the way he was gonna pay Lockwood back, then looked over at his son. "Say, has Lockwood ever acted that way with you or your mamma?"

"What, hit us?" John Ross asked and J.R. nodded. "No. He yells at me sometimes but he has never hit me."

"Well, what's he got to yell at you about?" J.R. asked indignantly.

"Just stupid stuff like closing the door behind me and cleaning my room. It's not so bad anymore now that he's gone a lot."

"Hmm. Does he ever yell at your mamma?"

"Well, he did once, when I first got here, but never again. I think he's scared she'll kick him outta the house."

"Is he now?" A brief look of amusement passed over J.R.'s expression.

"It's Mom's house," John Ross continued, "Don just lives there. He has a house out in the country, but it's a dump."

J.R. mentally noted all the details his son supplied and factored them into his plan. John Ross glanced over at his distracted father, contemplating the question he had been thinking about since they left the house.

"Daddy, can I ask you a question?"

"'Course you can."

"It's kinda personal."

"Well," J.R. unintentionally paused as he wondered what was coming next. "That's okay."

"I was just wondering, about you kissing Mamma today."

J.R. smiled at the memory. "It seems like the minute I get close enough to your mamma, all I can think about is kissin' her."

"She didn't seem to mind."

J.R. tried not to smile at the observation. "No, I guess she didn't."

"Do you still love her?"

"Like no other, son," J.R. replied without hesitation. "She is one hell of a woman. And I hope someday you find a woman like her to love." He looked over at John Ross. "But if you do, keep hold of her real good and tight. Because I didn't and your mamma ended up with Lockwood."

"Why don't you just take her back?"

"It's not that simple. I gave her too many reasons to be mad at me. And she has made it very clear she doesn't want anything else to do with me."

"That's not what it looked like today."

If J.R. Ewing was capable of blushing, he would have at his son's comment. He grinned instead.

"Well, I was just damn lucky I didn't get my face slapped."

"I don't understand you guys," John Ross replied, clearly frustrated. "You act like you want to be together then spend all this time apart."

J.R. was surprised by his son's outburst but knew exactly what he meant. He had wondered about the same thing … too many times to count.

"I know all this has gotta be confusin' to you, John Ross. There are so many things between your mamma and me ... so many things I can't even explain. But the way we feel about each other ... well, our feelings are much friendlier when we are apart 'cause when we're livin' together, we have a tendency to make each other miserable." J.R. paused briefly then continued with a touch of sadness. "It's usually me who makes her miserable."

"How come, Dad … if you love her?"

It took J.R. a few moments before he could answer.

"I don't know, son," he said quietly. "The reasons seemed right at the time. But now I can see just how wrong I was."

"She doesn't love Don. She never has."

"What makes you say that?"

"I've never seen her look at him the way she looks at you. It's just … different. Like she likes him, but she doesn't love him."

Already impressed by his son's unflinching honesty, J.R. finally realized he had greatly underestimated what an observant, intelligent young man John Ross had become. The child that could be easily placated was gone but J.R. didn't mind. If given the chance, perhaps he could now cultivate both an alliance and a friendship with his son. His heart swelled at the possibility.

"Maybe so. But we've gotta respect your mother's choice. Whatever she feels about Lockwood …"

Undeterred, John Ross uncharacteristically interrupted his father. "Would you like to have Mamma back?"

"I surely would."

"Then how about if we work on that together?"

J.R. looked over at his son, surprised at what sounded like a deal trying to be made. "John Ross, you tryin' to play matchmaker for me and your mamma?"

"Yes, sir. It's taking forever, waiting for you two to get back together on your own."

"Well, what did you have in mind?" J.R. cautiously asked.

"I don't know yet. But I'm sure we can come up with a plan. Can't we?"

J.R. looked at John Ross blankly, unsure whether to issue a reprimand or laugh at his son's frank confidence. He chose the latter.

"Boy, if your mamma knew we were havin' this conversation, we'd both end up on her list," J.R. grinned. "And I'm there permanently. Believe me, you don't wanna join me."

"It's worth the risk," John Ross replied with a grin that matched his father's. "Do we have a deal?"

J.R. loved seeing the scheming silver gleam in his sons' blue eyes. He truly was a Ewing and the resemblance to himself thrilled J.R. He offered his hand to his son and they shook on it.

"Yes, we do. I'm up for just about anything that would get her away from Mister Hollywood."

"Only one thing," John Ross suddenly cautioned. "I want us all back on Southfork at the end."

"Have you missed Southfork?" J.R. wondered aloud, thrilled to know his son still thought of Southfork and Texas.

"Yes, sir."

"Then why didn't you just come home, John Ross? You never need an invitation."

"I know, Daddy. But Mamma needs me more than you do right now."

"Yes, she does," J.R. nodded then smiled at his son once again. "And I'm glad she's got you, bud. Damn glad."


	16. Part 16

LONDON RAIN, Part 16

Sue Ellen drove through the city, going nowhere, seeking a temporary escape in the quiet of her car. The quarrel with Don consumed her thoughts but she reasoned that after some time alone to think, she would calm down and return home. But the more she thought about it, the angrier she became.

Don had done and said things she didn't know he was capable of. What had changed? Something was different about him but she couldn't pinpoint what. Plus having J.R. thrown in the mix hadn't helped.

Sue Ellen sighed as she considered her ex-husband. Even though it wasn't his fault, it didn't surprise her that so much chaos had followed him to London. He seemed to be a human lightening rod for disharmony and discord. Too bad it had landed in her direction, as usual. Yet in a way, she liked knowing he was in the city and not just for John Ross.

An irritated half-smile curved her lips. Funny how that thought didn't bother her but common sense had never applied to her attraction to J.R. Each time they had been in contact the past few days, each time he had kissed her, she felt the pull towards him become stronger, deeper. She shook her head. He always had known just how to charm and seduce her. The bastard.

She laughed out loud at that familiar curse word she had called J.R. too many times to count. No man had ever excited or infuriated her like he did. Now he was here, so deliciously close, and so many feelings were resurfacing about him. Feelings she thought impossible, even just a few days ago.

Several abrupt honks silenced Sue Ellen's daydream and brought her back to reality. She was stopped at a green light and the impatient driver behind her was letting her know. As she stepped on the gas to pull away, she chastised herself for becoming so distracted. It was time to pull off somewhere. The self-imposed isolation of the car had suddenly lost its appeal.

She considered and rejected several options. Dinner at her favorite restaurant would be a nice retreat but she disliked eating alone. Shopping was always a good idea but the stores were packed with Christmas shoppers. She even thought about going home but that was the last thing she wanted to do. When an image of John Ross suddenly popped into her head, she smiled. That was where she belonged, with her son, even if it meant more contact with J.R. Determination flooded through her. She would find some way to keep him at a distance. She was more than capable of handling him now.

At the next intersection, Sue Ellen turned the car around and headed in the direction of Hyde Park Corner and the Lanesborough Hotel.

-

Once the maze of cars and holiday shoppers that clogged Knightsbridge was successfully navigated, Sue Ellen pulled into the hotel entrance and stopped. When she got out, the imposing, stately façade made her pulse jump as she recalled her last visit and the kisses she had shared with J.R. She had asked him to leave London that day. Perhaps it would be best to ask him to do so again tonight.

The Lanesborough doorman remembered Sue Ellen and approached her. "Good evening, Mrs. Ewing-Lockwood."

The tactful greeting gently jarred Sue Ellen from her thoughts and she smiled. "Good evening. How nice of you to remember me."

"Of course, madam. Mr. Ewing told me you might join him and your son for the evening."

"Did he really?" Sue Ellen sarcastically asked as a flash of temper lit her eyes and erased her smile. She resented the fact she had done exactly what J.R. expected her to do. Her first impulse was to get back into the car and drive off but going back into the heavy traffic was not an attractive idea. Plus she needed to see John Ross. As she considered her options, her eyes drifted across Knightsbridge. The short-term answer stretched out before her.

She slammed the car door and handed the keys to the doorman. "Would you please ask the valet to take my car to the hotel car park?" She pointed over her shoulder. "I think I need a visit to Saint George before I enter the cave of the dragon."

The doorman grinned at the sardonic reference to the statue of the famous dragon slayer in the park across the street. "Of course, madam. I will retain the keys until you return."

"Thank you so much," she replied as she reached into her billfold and withdrew a twenty-pound note. She smiled once again as she handed it to him.

"Thank you, madam," he said as he took the bill and tipped his hat. The man was used to dealing with the rich and beautiful from all over the world but never had he been so impressed by such a warm beauty. "The skies threaten with rain," he quickly added, "would you like an umbrella?"

"No, thank you. I'll take my chances."

With that, Sue Ellen headed for the nearest pedestrian crossing and soon entered Hyde Park. It was one of her favorite spots in London and the closest thing to the wide-open spaces of Texas she could find in the city. Both she and John Ross loved to ride horses on Rotten Row and the manicured paths that weaved through gardens and famous statuary were wonderful for long walks. However, tonight the scenery went unnoticed.

Time passed as she wandered aimlessly down whichever route contained the least amount of people. Her thoughts returned again and again to what had happened earlier. She felt trapped in an emotional tug-of-war between what Don had done and what she felt for J.R. How she wished she could find a way around both but as hard as she tried, answers escaped her. Then she suddenly stopped, realizing her thoughts were leading her to the same place her walk was … nowhere. Besides, she rationalized, she wasn't the one who needed to make amends, they were. They would just have to straighten themselves out. And J.R. would have to straighten himself out in Paris. She would indeed ask him once again to leave London.

With that decision made, she glanced around to get her bearings and was struck by the beauty that surrounded her. Early evening had faded into night and the busy thoroughfares that bordered Hyde Park were lit up like one giant Christmas display. London was beautiful during Christmas. No other city celebrated or was as extensively decorated for the special day. Being in the middle of the noisy, bustling city, the park had taken on a graceful peacefulness as the neighboring lights enhanced the feeling. It was just the kind of atmosphere she had needed to clear her head once and for all.

A light drizzle began to fall and her coat offered little protection from the damp cold. Plus her feet ached from walking so far in her highly fashionable but impractical high heels.

A short distance away, she could see the Lanesborough through the barren trees. Even though she wasn't looking forward to the planned confrontation with J.R., the need to see John Ross pushed her on towards the hotel. So did the chance to get warm.

As she came closer to Hyde Park Corner and the massive white triple gates of The Grand Entrance, her pace slowed then she stopped. Casually leaning against one of the noble arches as if he owned it was the tall, arrogant form of a man wearing a cowboy hat. Her determination wilted, realizing she would have to face him sooner than expected.

J.R. smiled when he spotted her then stood up straight and walked towards her.

"Damn you," she angrily muttered when he was close enough. "How much did you pay the doorman to spy on me?"

"Not a dime. He's the one who called me and said you were walkin' around over here by yourself." J.R. looked at her for a moment. "Want some company?"

"No," she replied defiantly as she inwardly shrunk away from the decision she had made earlier. The thought of being alone with J.R. for any amount of time, even with John Ross present, suddenly seemed like a terrible idea. "I'm going home."

"Goin' home?" J.R. reached out to take her arm as she walked past him but she pulled away. "Is that wise considerin' the mood that son-of-a-bitch you're married to is in?"

She stopped and glared back at him. "J.R., don't make this more difficult than it already is."

"Fair enough," he replied as he held up his hand as a peace offering and approached her. "But I think you came here for a reason, Sue Ellen. You want to be with John Ross. I can certainly understand that."

She glared at him, resenting once again that he knew her so well. The light drizzle turned to rain and J.R. frowned at her hesitation.

"Look, you're soaked and probably freezin' to death," he continued as he turned up the collar on his coat and wrapped it around his neck. "I know I am. Come on over to the hotel and dry off. I'll get you a room and whatever else you need. I'll even move to another hotel so you can stay with John Ross, if you want. Just don't go home." Still she didn't answer. "C'mon, darlin'. At least have dinner with us."

Sue Ellen observed him, looking for any hint of treachery, but knew his offer was genuine. Plus she now shook from the cold and had no desire to walk one step further than necessary.

"All right," she gave in with a nod, "but just dinner."

J.R. flashed her a grin and they started walking toward the hotel. He wrapped his arm around her then pulled her close to his side, relieved that she hadn't flinched away from him.

"Are you crazy, walkin' around in weather like this?" He playfully asked.

"It seemed like a good idea at the time," she said, unable to control the chatter of her teeth.

He gingerly rubbed his hand up and down her arm, the friction radiating through her coat, warming her. His strength and body heat were far too appealing to resist and she huddled against him as all planned resistance to him deserted her. At the moment, the warmth of his body against hers and her uncontrollable response to his touch felt too good to fight.


	17. Part 17

LONDON RAIN, Part 17

The door of the hotel suite opened and Sue Ellen entered, followed by J.R.

"Say, John Ross!" J.R. called out. "Look who's here."

"Mamma!" John Ross grinned as he rushed over to hug his mother. Sue Ellen smiled and wrapped her arms around him.

"Hi, sweetheart!"

"I've been worried about you," John Ross said as he pulled back to look up at her, perplexed by her soggy appearance. "Where have you been?"

"I went for a drive then stopped and took a walk in Hyde Park."

"In the rain?"

The confusion in her son's expression made Sue Ellen laugh. "It wasn't raining when I started out," she replied as she automatically reached out to smooth the hair back from his eyes.

J.R. placed his hands on Sue Ellen's shoulders and helped her remove her coat. She shivered when the air hit her damp suit underneath.

"I asked your mamma to have dinner with us and she agreed," J.R. said to John Ross as he removed his own coat and took off his cowboy hat.

"Cool!" But the smile on John Ross' face slowly faded back into a look of concern. "What about Don, Mamma? Did you two fight?"

J.R. felt himself tense up at the mention of Sue Ellen's husband. He was grateful his back was turned as he hung the coats in the closet. He wasn't sure how he would react if her response was negative.

"No, John Ross … we didn't fight," Sue Ellen gently said. "We tried to talk it out but neither of us was in the right frame of mind. That's why I left. I'm hoping after we both cool down a bit, we'll get things straightened out."

J.R. inwardly cringed. That answer was worse than hearing they had fought.

"Well, Mom," John Ross said as a mischievous smile slowly lighted his face, "you really did cool down, didn't you?"

Sue Ellen laughed at his observation. J.R. joined her, enjoying the fact that John Ross had inherited her sharp, lightening-fast wit.

"Why don't you show your mamma around this place, son," J.R. said. "I'll call that butler of ours."

"Yes, sir," John Ross replied with a smile then looked up at his mother. "Mom, this is the greatest place. Come and see!"

John Ross took her hand and led her deeper into the lavish suite as Sue Ellen took in the warmth of the Regency style decorations. Handcrafted period furnishings filled the room, highlighted by rich textures of oriental rugs, dark leathers, gold brocade upholstery and Gainsborough-style portraits that hung on dark wood panels.

She smiled. It was no wonder J.R. had chosen to stay here. The warm, slightly masculine atmosphere reminded her of his bedroom back at Southfork. Plus the Texas warmth the hotel radiated was no coincidence. When The Lanesborough opened, she had taken great pleasure in learning the Dallas-based hotel chain that ran her favorite hotel back in Dallas was now responsible for London's newest hotel.

John Ross showed her all the hidden modern technology the suite had to offer including a state-of-the-art television and stereo. As he pushed buttons, demonstrating how it all worked, a program popped up on the television and diverted his attention.

Sue Ellen smiled down at him, amused that she had seemingly been forgotten, and gravitated toward the warm, inviting fireplace. She held out her cold hands to the flames then rubbed them together, trying to get the feeling back in her numb fingers.

Unnoticed across the room, J.R. took the opportunity to observe her fluid movements. How he loved the idea she was back in his territory. He wished there was some way to get her to stay and never go back to Lockwood. Have her and John Ross return to Paris with him. Convince her to remarry him so they could be a family again. Share his life and his bed.

He abruptly shook off the thoughts, knowing there was no possibility of any of that happening right now. It was a chance of a lifetime just to have her here and he would make no advance towards her. It would be worth platonically sharing her company just to have her away from Lockwood. Besides, he had more fence-mending to do with her before anything else could happen and tonight would be the perfect opportunity.

Sue Ellen was observing the view of Hyde Park from the window when J.R. approached. She felt his presence even before she saw him and smiled.

"I was wondering how you found me in that huge park," she softly said.

"Well, between the doorman and this window, you were easy to spot. No other woman has a walk quite like yours."

Sue Ellen turned to him, a dismissive reply ready, but when she looked into the silver blue of his eyes, all thoughts escaped her. She shivered once again and looked back down into the flames of the fire.

J.R. wanted to reach out and touch her, bring her close then warm her against him. Once again, he held himself in check.

"Say, how 'bout if I take John Ross out and round us up some food and some clothes for you to change into?"

"J.R. please, don't go to any trouble. I'll be fine. This fire is all I need."

"That suit of yours is gonna stay damp for hours if you don't take it off and dry it. Besides, let me do somethin' nice for you, will ya? Let me show you I can."

Sue Ellen looked back at him, surprised by the sincerity in his voice. Out of all the people in the world, the one person she should hate the most was the one she felt she could trust completely at that moment. Plus he was right. If she stayed in the damp clothes, she would catch a chill, no matter how warm the fire was.

"All right," she smiled sweetly. "What a refreshing change."

J.R. grinned at the playful dig. "While we're gone, feel free to go in and take a hot bath so you can warm up."

She straightened up and shook her head. "I don't think so, J.R. …"

"Look, you're shiverin' and I don't want you gettin' sick," he gently interrupted her. "Besides, what could happen with your son here?" He suddenly grinned again. "You ain't had a bath 'til you experience that tub in there. And I know how much you love soakin' in a hot bath."

A flash of electricity ran through her at the intimate comment, making her shiver again but not from the cold. His offer really was tempting but before she could answer, a knock on the door sounded out.

"Well, you think about it," J.R. continued, knowing from her expression that she was considering his suggestion. He headed for the door and opened it to the smiling face of an older, pleasant-looking woman fully dressed in traditional butler attire.

"Good evening, Mr. Ewing," she said with a smile.

"Good evening," J.R. replied and glanced over at Sue Ellen. He could tell she was surprised. His idea to ask for a female butler that night just paid off. "Please, come in and meet my family."

The butler followed him in and stood at his side, waiting for the next instruction.

"This is my son, John Ross," J.R. said proudly as he motioned to John Ross. Then he looked over at Sue Ellen. "And his mother, Sue Ellen."

J.R. had deliberately left off her last name and Sue Ellen knew it. She shot him a glare as she approached the butler.

"I am Marian, the night butler," the woman said with a nod to Sue Ellen and smiled at John Ross. "Whatever you require during your stay, please let me know."

"Marian," Sue Ellen said with her most gracious smile, "as you can see, I'm in need of a hot bath and the laundry service."

"I'll be happy to assist you, Mrs. Ewing," Marian replied with a warm smile. "I will bring up some appropriate toiletries and draw a bath for you. Then I will take care of your suit. Is there anything else I can get you on my return? Perhaps a pot of hot tea?"

"That would be lovely," Sue Ellen replied, not bothering to correct the butler's assumption that her last name was Ewing. It would take more energy than she had at the moment to explain the situation.

"Very good, madam," Marian said then scurried off to attend to her duties.

Sue Ellen glanced over at J.R., who wore a very self-satisfied grin. He had anticipated her needs and had enjoyed her reaction. But Sue Ellen felt no need to fight with him about it. No, just the opposite. She had almost forgotten how nice it was to be showered with attention by J.R. Ewing. And after all that had happened today, it felt damn good to be looked after.

"Thank you, J.R.," she said softly.

J.R. felt the breath catch in his chest as he looked at her. At that moment, with the firelight illuminating her from behind, he could recall no other time when she looked more beautiful. He gave her a short nod then cleared his throat and looked down at John Ross.

"C'mon, John Ross. We've got some shoppin' to do for your mamma."

John Ross looked over at Sue Ellen, almost as if he needed her approval. She smiled and nodded.

"Okay, Dad," he grinned. "Let's go."

J.R. looked back and gave Sue Ellen a playful, seductive smile as he deliberately ran his eyes down the curves of her body. "You're still wearin' the same size, aren't you?"

"Yes." Sue Ellen felt herself blush but couldn't contain her smile. He was so damn charming when he wanted to be.

"There are some hotel robes in the bathroom," J.R. said as walked over to the closet and retrieved his coat. John Ross followed and pulled on his coat as J.R. placed his cowboy hat back on his head. "Or feel free to wear mine."

"A hotel robe sounds lovely," Sue Ellen replied.

"We'll be back in an hour," J.R. answered back, secretly thrilled in the verbal game of one-upmanship. He had dearly missed the way Sue Ellen challenged him at ever turn.

John Ross smiled at her and waved. "Bye, Mom. I'm glad you're here."

Seeing the happiness on her son's face, Sue Ellen felt as if her heart and stomach had liquefied. She returned his smile.

"Thank you, sweetheart. Keep an eye on your daddy for me, hmm? Don't let him spend too much money."

"Yes, ma'am," John Ross giggled at the impossible suggestion.

Having his parents together like this and the thought of being able to spend time with them both seemed like a dream John Ross never thought would come true.


	18. Part 18

LONDON RAIN, Part 18

Fresh from her hot bath and wrapped up in one of the warm hotel robes, Sue Ellen sat in the leather chair in front of the fireplace and gazed into the flames. She was exhausted but she fought the impulse to sleep. As soon as J.R. and John Ross returned, she would need to leave. But the quiet of the suite combined with the warmth of the fire and the tea the butler had just left made her feel irresistibly peaceful.

She sipped the warm tea and watched the flames dance. She didn't want to leave. All she had to look forward to was another confrontation with Don. Nothing would get better between them until they settled several things and that probably meant another fight. There was no alternative. She looked longingly around the hotel suite. If only she could stay with there with J.R. and John Ross. Just for tonight.

A pang of regret shot through her heart because she knew she couldn't. It would make the situation with Don worse. But it had been so good to see J.R. and John Ross together today. It was obvious how much they adored each other again now that J.R. had made amends with his son. Plus the bleakness she had sensed in J.R. when she first saw him seemed to be gone.

She smiled. It wasn't as difficult as she thought to admit she actually cared about J.R. again. There was just something so appealing about him now. Plus the chemistry was still so strong between them … maybe even stronger. She had missed it. Oh, there was no doubt he was still dangerous and probably more than capable of breaking her heart once more. But damn … what a thrill it was to be around him again. She felt vibrant again for the first time in years. It was an incredible feeling.

Sharing his bathroom had heightened the sensation. It was like being immersed in him with reminders everywhere like his razor, bathrobe, soap and his favorite aftershave. She had even picked the bottle up to smell it. How she loved that scent. Don wore a light, citrus fragrance that was barely noticeable. Not that J.R.'s aftershave was overbearing, he knew just the right amount to use. But his was a deep rich mix of sensual spices that were masculine enough to compliment his business suits yet dashing enough to go along with his tuxedo.

A few months ago, she had turned around in the airport, expecting to see him when she realized it was only a man passing by who wore the same scent. What a private pleasure it had been, thinking J.R. was in London. It was nothing compared to actually having him here.

Sue Ellen sighed and shook her head, trying to banish the forbidden thoughts. She knew she shouldn't allow herself to dwell so deeply on her ex-husband. Both she and J.R. were so vulnerable and something could probably happen between them very easily. But that didn't make it right. How could she even consider being unfaithful to Don when infidelity was what she had hated most about J.R.?

A clatter outside the door distracted her attention and she looked over to see the door swing open. J.R. entered, followed by John Ross and three bellboys carrying an array of packages and cartons.

"Set everything down on the table over there, boys," J.R. commanded his impromptu army, "and thank you very much." He handed each of them a five-pound note and they discreetly retreated.

"Mom, come over here and see what we brought you!" John Ross shouted excitedly.

Sue Ellen laughed at his exuberance. She got out of the chair and approached them.

"My word!" She said as she circled the table, looking at all the boxes then looked back at John Ross. "Thought you said you were gonna keep an eye on how much money your daddy spent?"

"I did! Well, I tried. He told the sales clerk at Harrods what he was looking for and she took care of everything. So it was her fault."

Sue Ellen laughed again and J.R. felt as if a burst of sunshine had been released in his chest. Her hair was still wet from the bath, the color nearly black from the dampness that remained, and several strands clung to her forehead and cheek. It made a dramatic contrast against the porcelain of her skin, turning her eyes deep brown. She looked smaller, almost a little vulnerable, and so damn appealing. When she looked over at him, he grinned, trying to hide his thoughts from her ever-attentive eyes.

"Go ahead and start openin' them, darlin'," he gently said. "See if you approve."

She watched him for a moment then returned his smile and turned her attention back to the boxes.

Upon being opened, each box revealed an exquisite article of clothing including a soft knit sweater, cashmere slacks, two cotton shirts, a pair of jeans, a pair of loafers and high heels, a warm jacket, plus several items of delicate lingerie including a silk nightgown and matching robe. Sue Ellen raised her hand to her mouth, truly overwhelmed by all the beautiful items. She couldn't have picked better if she had been standing next to them in the store.

"What's the matter?" John Ross asked, puzzled by her reaction. "Don't you like what we picked out?"

Sue Ellen looked over at him and grinned. "Oh no, sweetheart! Everything is absolutely wonderful! I'm just so touched by it all." She looked over at J.R. and smiled. "Thank you so much, J.R. I don't know what to say."

"Just consider it an early Christmas present," J.R. replied. Then he pointed at John Ross, deliberately trying to deflect her attention. "You son there ended up with some gadget that plays music."

"It's a CD player, Mom!" He withdrew the silver, rounded box from his pocket. "Plus Dad bought me a bunch of CDs to go with it. Isn't it great?"

"It's wonderful," Sue Ellen said as she placed her arm around his shoulder and admired the new toy. She looked back at J.R. "And what did you buy for you?"

"Nothin'. I've got everything I want right here."

Sue Ellen knew exactly what – and whom – he meant, but J.R. quickly covered it with a flip reply.

"We bought steaks and all the fixins at some American restaurant over at Harrods. Damn, this city ain't as bad as I was thinkin' it was." Sue Ellen laughed, just as he hoped she would, and he started moving packages "C'mon, you two. Let's clear off a spot so we can eat."

"Good, I'm starvin'," John Ross replied.

"Can you wait five minutes while I go change?" Sue Ellen asked as she picked up several articles of clothing from the boxes.

"Sure," J.R. grinned, "we'll wait for you." J.R. looked over at John Ross. "Won't we, son?"

"Yes, sir!" John Ross replied with a broad smile. "You're the guest of honor, Mom."

Sue Ellen looked at John Ross then back at J.R. Living proof that charm could be inherited.

"I won't be long."


	19. Part 19

LONDON RAIN, Part 19

The dinner plates and boxes had been cleared from the hotel suite's elegant dining room table and J.R., John Ross and Sue Ellen sat in a semi-circle at the end, all deeply involved in the card game they were playing.

"C'mon, Mom," John Ross gently coaxed. "You've gotta call, raise or fold."

"I know," Sue Ellen replied, still focused on her cards. "I'm just weighing my options."

As Sue Ellen studied the hand she had been dealt, J.R. took the opportunity to observe her, unnoticed. She had applied minimum makeup and quickly styled her hair loosely around her face. Wrapped in one of the sweaters that was a size too big, her feet were bare and one jean-clad leg was tucked under the other. The casual, carefree look reminded J.R. of the young beauty pageant queen he had married twenty years ago. Yet she was so much more attractive now.

"Your mamma never was one to just jump into somethin' without thinkin' about it," J.R. said to John Ross with a smirk. "Took me almost three years just to get her to marry me."

"Three years?" John Ross repeated in a question as he looked over at his mother. "Geez Mom, what took you so long?"

Sue Ellen shot J.R. an irritated glare. "Because it took your father two and a half years to get up the nerve to ask me."

John Ross giggled, enjoying the chance to hear little-known facts about his parents' marriage. Any detail was golden because both rarely spoke of the other, although his mother had mentioned his father more lately.

"You weren't chicken, were you, Dad?" John Ross grinned.

"Chicken? Hell no … I was flat out scared to death!" J.R. replied with a laugh. "I'd never asked a girl to marry me before. I thought for sure she was gonna turn me down."

"You never told me that," Sue Ellen said, surprised.

J.R. looked at her for a moment and smiled then turned back at John Ross. "You know somethin', son? The minute I laid eyes on your mamma, I knew she was special. I knew she was the girl I wanted to marry."

"Was that when she was Miss Texas?" John Ross asked, hoping for more details.

"Mmm-hmm. You shoulda' seen her up there on that stage. Tall … beautiful … looked like she owned the place. But she could have cared less she was in a beauty pageant."

"The pagaent was my mother's idea." Sue Ellen said flatly. "I felt like I was in a Fort Worth cattle auction."

"Now just hold on, Miz Texas," J.R. replied with a mischievous grin. "I'm gettin' to the good part, so would you just let me tell the boy the story and not interrupt?"

Sue Ellen rolled her eyes and sank into quiet submission, but couldn't help but smile. She winked at John Ross, who was enjoying the familiar cadence of his parents' exchanges.

J.R. looked back at John Ross and knew he had a captive audience. His son was seemingly hanging on every word.

"There was somethin' like thirty girls up there on that stage," J.R. continued. "All prancin' around in their swimsuits, tryin' to look cute." Without looking at her, J.R. motioned to Sue Ellen with his thumb. "Then Miz Austin here came glidin' in on those amazin' legs of hers, her eyes full of fire and spirit." J.R. stopped and smiled at the recollection. "I tell you what, son," he continued, a touch of awe now in his voice. "Your mamma stood out from the rest by miles 'cause all it took was one look to know she was different from the rest. Different from any of the girls I knew back then." J.R. looked over at Sue Ellen and the intensity of his gaze her pulse rate unexpectedly jump. "She was a lady. And I knew I wanted to get to know her better."

"What did you think about Dad, Mom?" John Ross eagerly asked.

Sue Ellen looked over at her son, relieved for the distraction from J.R.'s gaze.

"Well, news of your father's reputation with the ladies had made it all the way to Austin, so I thought I knew what to expect when I heard he would be judging the pageant. Rumor even had it that he was dating Miss Corpus Christi, so I thought the contest was hers."

"That was not true, by the way," J.R. interjected indignantly. "She was a dog."

"Shhh!" Sue Ellen playfully scolded him, trying not to laugh then she looked back at John Ross, who was laughing. "At the reception after the pageant, I heard someone call out my name and turned around to find myself looking into the first silver-blue pair of eyes I'd ever seen."

"Mine are the same color, huh, Mom?" John Ross proudly said.

"Yes, they are, sweetheart," Sue Ellen grinned, purposefully avoiding looking over at J.R. "After that, your father introduced himself … John Ewing, Junior."

"You used to go by John, Dad?" John Ross unintentionally interrupted, curiosity about the connection back to his own name getting the better of him.

"I did, son, but only for formal introductions. That was before your granddaddy died."

"Sorta out of respect for him?"

"Yep, you got it," J.R. replied with a grin, impressed by how quickly his son picked up on things. Then he looked back at Sue Ellen. "So, anything else you'd like to share about how charmin' I was that night?"

Sue Ellen bit back the curse for him that came to mind. Instead, she graced him with an icy glare that made him chuckle and she turned her attention back to John Ross.

"Your father was charming that night, John Ross. I resisted all his advances, though, and kept myself occupied with introductions to the patrons and sponsors, because I still thought he was a rogue." She paused for a moment then smiled. "But even with all the people I had to meet that night, I couldn't quite keep my eyes off him." She looked back at J.R. "Until he left with Miss Corpus Christi."

"One of the organizers asked me to escort her to her car!" J.R. exclaimed, trying to defend his reputation. "What was I supposed to do? The girl had just come in dead last in a beauty pageant. How the hell was I supposed to know if there were any dog catchers out that night?"

"J.R.!" Sue Ellen half-heartedly scolded him.

John Ross laughed out loud again and Sue Ellen tried to look disapproving but knew she was losing the battle. It had been a long time since she had heard J.R. use his wicked sense of humor and she enjoyed it immensely.

"So what did you do next, Dad?" John Ross asked, still giggling.

"I outlasted her," J.R. grinned. "I knew your mamma couldn't leave 'til the last guest was gone, so I waited."

"And waited and waited and waited," Sue Ellen added. "Stubborn mule."

"She didn't know what a patient man I am," J.R. remarked to his son. "Besides, perfection is always worth waitin' for."

Sue Ellen quickly looked over at J.R., momentarily surprised by the compliment, and he gave her an enchanting smile.

"How much did it cost you to keep the band there that long?" She softly asked him, still touched by the compliment.

"Five thousand dollars," J.R. replied, seeing only her at that moment.

"Five thousand dollars?" John Ross interjected. "Wow, that's a lot of money even now."

"They said they needed a new van but I didn't care … I just scribbled out a check and handed it to them." He looked over at Sue Ellen. "It was worth every penny. You finally danced with me."

"Yes, I did."

J.R. smiled at her recollection and nodded.

"Turned out your father was a wonderful dancer," Sue Ellen said as she looked back at John Ross. "Then I wished I would have danced with him earlier, because the band packed up and left after that."

"And your Grandma Shepard came over and practically stood between us," J.R. said to his son. "I barely had time to slip your mamma my business card before she was gone."

"You should have seen Mamma's face later that night when she read, 'John Ewing, Junior – Vice President, Ewing Oil' on the card," Sue Ellen replied with a laugh.

"She spent years apologizin' to me for that," J.R. laughed. "She called me at the office the very next day and invited me for dinner the next time I was in Austin. I was there that night." J.R. looked over at John Ross again. "I made a lot of trips to Austin after that."

"So, you fell for each other the first time you saw each other," John Ross observed.

"Love at first sight," Sue Ellen said faintly, her thoughts holding her back in 1967.

"No doubt about it, son," J.R. replied to John Ross with a smile.

J.R. looked back at Sue Ellen, knowing exactly where her thoughts had taken her. He reached over to take her hand in his, but she quickly picked up the playing cards she had been dealt and deftly thumbed through them, concentrating on the play.

As she deliberately studied the cards, Sue Ellen tried to banish all thoughts of just how much she wanted to take his hand, touch him. But 1967 was too far in the past.

"Okay, John Ross," Sue Ellen said and cleared her throat. "It's still my turn, right?"

"Yes, Mom," John Ross said as he reluctantly picked up his cards, knowing all too well the moment of closeness had passed between his parents. Something had pulled them apart once again, just as it always did. "Call, raise, or fold."

"I'm all in," Sue Ellen said as she pushed all of her chips to the center of the table.

J.R. whistled, hoping to cover his disappointment at Sue Ellen's withdrawal with the bravado he had always relied on. "That's a lot of chips."

"She's bluffing," John Ross replied as he studied his mother, not sure if she was or not.

"Well, it's gonna cost you to find out, Mr. Ewing," Sue Ellen slowly drawled, using her full Texas accent that had lost none of its disarming purr.

J.R. sat back in his chair and grinned. It thrilled him to once again hear Sue Ellen use the native accent that did Texas proud.

Across from him, John Ross continued to study his mother until a look of resolution lightened his expression.

"You're on," John Ross said and pushed all his chips into the middle of the table. "Let's see 'em, Mom."

"Three cowboys," she demurely replied as she laid down three kings, a deuce and a ten.

"Wow," John Ross exclaimed. "How'd you know they are called cowboys?"

"What else would they call 'em in Texas?" Sue Ellen smiled as her son seemed to hesitate. "So, you gonna show me what you've got, John Ross?"

"Well … yeah," John Ross answered reluctantly as he placed his cards down on the table in front of him, revealing a heart flush of 2, 5, 4, 9, and 10.

Sue Ellen looked at the cards then at her son. He gave her a slow grin that perfectly matched his father's and she realized she had fallen for his bluff.

"Where did you learn to be such a card shark?" She asked, amused.

"The Southfork bunkhouse," John Ross replied. "Just like Dad did."

Sue Ellen looked over at J.R. "I should have known you had something to do with this."

J.R. laughed and held up his hands in resignation. "Don't blame me, the boy is a natural. Besides, the best hand I've had tonight is a pair of deuces with an ace kicker. I'm just hopin' he'll take a check."

"Don't worry, Dad … your credit is good with me," John Ross replied with a cocky smile as he counted his chips, making both of his parents laugh.

After a moment, Sue Ellen looked down at her watch. "My goodness, it's after midnight. Time for you to turn in, John Ross."

"Awww, Mamma," he reluctantly whined in reply.

"Now, c'mon son," J.R. gently coaxed. "Your mamma is still the boss around here, even if you're not home. She sets the rules."

"And I'm only doing it because I know you're dead tired from such a busy day," Sue Ellen added.

"Yes, ma'am." John Ross still wasn't convinced.

"Besides, the quicker you go to bed," she replied, "the earlier you'll wake up and you'll have that much more time to spend with your father in the morning."

"Okay, it's a deal!" John Ross said with a grin as he quickly stood up and tucked in his chair.

J.R. followed, standing up so he could hug John Ross. When he opened his arms, John Ross willingly walked into them and J.R. pulled him into a tight squeeze.

"'Night, son," J.R. softly said and gently slapped John Ross on the back.

"'Night, Dad. Sure am glad you're here … this has been the best day." John Ross stopped and looked up at J.R. "Think you can stay in London for Christmas?"

J.R. paused, caught off guard by the question. He looked over at Sue Ellen and knew she was equally surprised.

"Sorry son, 'fraid I can't. I'm leavin' for Saudi Arabia in a couple of days. I've got an oil field down there that ain't worth a damn and I've gotta meet with a government official to see about gettin' rid of it."

"But they don't have Christmas in Saudi Arabia," John Ross said with a frown, concern clouding his expression. "What will you do?"

"To tell you the truth, I hadn't really thought about it."

"Then stay here with us, Dad."

J.R. would have given his entire fortune not to have to disappoint his son at that moment but he knew there was nothing else he could say or do.

"John Ross," J.R. gently said. "I can't tell you how much your offer means to me. But it wouldn't be fair to your step-daddy if I stayed. You and your mamma, you are his family now. So you need to celebrate with him."

John Ross wasn't happy with that answer, but he didn't talk back. "Yes, sir," he said with a nod and looked away. "I understand."

The disappointment on John Ross' face felt like a kick in J.R.'s stomach until a compromise quickly came to him.

"Say, how 'bout comin' over to Paris and celebratin' the New Year with me? I've heard it's quite a party over there on New Year's Eve."

"Could I really?" John Ross asked, excited and happy once again.

"Sure!" J.R. said. "But we better ask your mamma first."

They both turned to Sue Ellen.

"Mom?" John Ross eagerly asked. "Can I?"

"Of course, you can," she replied with a genuine smile.

John Ross rushed to her and wrapped his arms around her in a heartfelt hug. "Thanks, Mom!"

Even if she had a good excuse to keep him home, Sue Ellen wouldn't have denied her son. She could tell just how important it was to him, although there was a possibility it meant she would be alone that night.

"Come over with him, Sue Ellen," J.R. added, seeming to read her mind once again. "We have a lot to celebrate. I have a feeling 1992 is gonna be one hell of a year for the Ewings in Europe."

The thought of being with J.R. in Paris was both tempting and terrifying. The city had become Sue Ellen's secret passion. Its ambiance had seeped into her soul with such heat and intensity that it now felt like a part of her. When she was there, she was nobody's wife, no one's daughter, not a possession. For the first time in her life, she could be herself and no one cared. She had also discovered that kind of freedom was a potent aphrodisiac; she fell in love and loved everything while in Paris. Adding J.R. to that would be a dangerous mix.

"We'll talk about it tomorrow at breakfast," she replied as she stood up then wrapped her arm around John Ross' shoulder. "Now, let's get you settled for the night."

"I'm ready, Mamma," John Ross conceded then looked up at his father and hugged him once again. "Night, Dad."

"Night, son."

As J.R. watched them walk off towards the bedroom, he was both amazed and enamored with the euphoric feeling that radiated through his chest. It was the first time in years he had been truly happy. If only he had known the way his life pivoted on Sue Ellen and John Ross, he would have come after them sooner. Hell, he would have never let her leave with Lockwood in the first place. But having them here, it was enough. Then he grinned.

Enough … at least for now.


	20. Part 20

LONDON RAIN, Part 20

Standing alone at the window, J.R. looked down on Hyde Park across the street. Sometime during the poker game, the rain had turned to snow and the city was now hidden under a blanket of white. He grinned. His luck truly did seem to be changing.

Even though Sue Ellen had mentioned breakfast to John Ross earlier, J.R. still doubted she would spend the night with them. Now the snow secured the deal; there was no way she could go back out and attempt to drive home on those roads. She would just have to stay. Platonically, of course. John Ross being asleep in the next room would give her that assurance. Besides, he reminded himself once again, he would be on his best behavior. Anything to keep her close at least for a few more hours.

"Mr. Ewing, sir," Marian the night butler politely said as she entered from the other room. "I've placed extra blankets and pillows in the hall closet. And once again, my apologies for not being able to accommodate your family with larger living quarters. Between the storm and the holidays, our rooms are filled to capacity."

"No harm done," J.R. replied as he turned and gave her a charming grin. "I don't mind sleepin' on the couch." He motioned to the window. "Any idea how the drivin' conditions are out there? Looks pretty treacherous."

"It is indeed, sir," Marian nodded as she busied herself with small tasks around the room "All city transportation has shut down and taxi service is no longer available."

"Does it snow here often? I thought y'all just had rain and fog."

"Only rarely do we get snow in London," Marian replied, smiling at the widely known assumption about London's weather. "When we do, it usually melts very quickly."

"Sounds kinda like Dallas."

"Unfortunately, the sudden temperature drop turned the rain earlier this evening into ice. Now we'll need the morning sun to warm it up."

Their attention turned to Sue Ellen as she entered the room.

"Ah, Mrs. Ewing," Marian nodded. "Do you require anything else for your stay tonight?"

"My stay?" Sue Ellen replied, puzzled by the question then realized J.R. must have mentioned it to the butler. "No, thank you, Marian. I'm not spending the night."

A quizzical look briefly flashed across Marian's face before quickly morphing back into her professional façade. She glanced over at J.R. and he jumped in.

"'Fraid you're gonna have to stay, darlin'," J.R. said to Sue Ellen "There's quite a snowstorm blowin' out there."

"Snow?" Sue Ellen went to the window to confirm it with her own eyes. "Oh, wonderful."

She suspiciously looked up at J.R., almost as if she thought he might have caused it. He simply grinned at her.

"Marian here was just tellin' me the city has shut down. Looks like the roads are no better than ice skatin' rinks."

"Yes, madam," Marian nodded. "The best thing would, perhaps, be for you to wait out the storm until morning."

"And all the rooms in this place are taken," J.R. added with a self-satisfied smile. "Ain't the damndest thing?"

Sue Ellen looked up at him once more, tempted to ask how much it had cost him to arrange that but she knew not even he could pull all this off. She reluctantly smiled, amused at his arrogance.

"Well, Mr. and Mrs. Ewing," Marian said, ready to excuse herself. "If there is nothing else you require, I will be off."

"Thank you, Marian," Sue Ellen warmly replied. "Good night."

"Good night, Mrs. Ewing," the butler said with a smile.

J.R. walked her to the door. "Yes, thank you, Marian, for all your help tonight. I'm gonna be sure and mention it to my buddy back in Dallas. He's got himself quite a hotel here."

"Why, thank you, Mister Ewing," Marian said and swallowed hard. There wasn't much that surprised her after so many years in service, but having her name mentioned to the president of the resort chain that owned the hotel caught her off guard. "Please ring if your require anything else."

"We will. 'Night!"

J.R. shut the door and turned to look at Sue Ellen. He leaned back against the door and gave her a wicked grin.

"J.R. Ewing, don't you even think about enjoying this," she warned.

"Oh, I'm enjoyin' the hell out of it," J.R. chuckled.

"You always get what you want," Sue Ellen observed, somewhat annoyed.

"Not always and certainly not lately." Then he grinned again. "But you bein' here … havin' to stay … Lady Luck seems to be lookin' my way again."

"Well, don't get yourself too excited," she replied and folded her arms across her chest in defiance. "We're going to set a few ground rules for tonight. Number one, you keep your distance. No more kissing."

"You liked that kiss I gave you this afternoon, didn't you?" He coaxed, his voice low and inviting.

Sue Ellen ignored him. "Number two, no talk of Don."

"Well that won't be difficult."

"Number there, sleeping arrangements."

"Oh good, I can't wait to hear this one!"

"You're obviously too tall for the couch, so you sleep with John Ross and I'll sleep on the couch."

"It's a huge, bed, Sue Ellen," J.R. replied. "There is room for six or seven people to bunk down there, let alone the three of us. With plenty of room in between."

She shook her head. "I don't think so, J.R."

"Well, then you sleep with the boy 'cause I don't want you sleepin' on the couch. That's just wouldn't right."

Sue Ellen walked over to the table and picked up the deck of cards they had played poker with earlier.

"Tell you what. We'll draw for it. High card gets the couch."

"You're on," he grinned.

Sue Ellen sat the deck back down on the table. She separated it by half and held up the bottom card. It was the Jack of Diamonds.

"There, beat that," she smirked.

J.R. reached down and picked up the next half of the stack. He looked at it then grinned.

"Ace of Spades."

"I should have known," she frowned.

J.R. sat the card down and held out his hand, motioning to the bedroom.

"Now, you just go ahead and change into one of those nighties I bought for you and I'll see you in the morning."

"I'll sleep in my clothes, thanks," Sue Ellen retorted. "And I'm not going to bed just yet."

"Aw, c'mon, Sue Ellen," J.R. grumbled, truly hoping he would catch a glimpse of her in one the nightgowns he had personally picked out for her at Harrods. "You have absolutely nothin' to worry about from me."

"Especially with your son asleep in the next room."

"I'm too damn tired for anything else," J.R. finally surrendered.

Sue Ellen laughed. "J.R., don't tell me you're getting old?"

"You ain't kiddin'! Hell, livin' with Cally scared at least ten years off me. I've gotta conserve 'em when I can now." Sue Ellen laughed once again and J.R. didn't care that it was at his expense. He adored the sound of her laughter. "How 'bout comin' over and sittin' with me in front of the fireplace," he softly asked after a moment. "I'd love to just talk with you."

Sue Ellen's smile faded and an uncomfortable silence fell between them as she debated what to do. Common sense told her to leave J.R. and go in the other room. Being with him and John Ross tonight had greatly heightened her maternal/familial impulses and increased her attraction to him exponentially. But she quickly rationalized it was a natural attraction because he was the father of her son. And it was something she could fight off because she loved Don, no matter how angry she was with him at the moment.

"All right," she said with a nod, defying her own instincts. "There is something I want to talk to you about."

"Then come on over here and sit down," J.R. said as he led the way to the leather chairs in front of the fireplace.

When they had both sat down, facing each other, Sue Ellen looked directly into his eyes and started. "Tell me what you have planned for Don."

J.R. felt his jaw drop at the directness of the question. How in the hell had she ever guessed that?


	21. Part 21

LONDON RAIN, Part 21

The initial shock of her question instantly wore off and was replaced by an unyielding tension. J.R. was ready for a fight.

"Where the hell did that come from," he angrily responded. "Thought you said he was off limits."

Sue Ellen didn't flinch. "Off limits to you, not me."

"Is that why you came here tonight? To protect his sorry ass?"

"You know it's not," she calmly replied. J.R. gave her a skeptical look, but she continued anyway. "Knowing you like I do, I had a feeling you wouldn't just turn the other cheek after he dropped that bombshell about the movie then hit you. Now tell me what you have planned for him."

"And if I don't?"

"Don't make me your enemy again, J.R."

"That may be unavoidable. I'm gonna do everything in my power to stop that movie from being seen, Sue Ellen. And that may spill over onto you."

Sue Ellen nodded. "Understood. But if I can stop the deal and get the film back, say in the next forty-eight hours?"

J.R. studied her for several moments, his merciless gaze startling her but she didn't shy away. Showing even a hint of weakness while negotiating with him would ruin any chance she had.

"Forty-eight hours is acceptable," he finally said. "But not a minute longer."

"Agreed. Now what else is there?"

J.R. admired her nerve. She had come a long way from the shy girl he had married so long ago. Yet he also realized if he told her his plans, the deal to acquire Lockwood's company might be in jeopardy. However, if he didn't tell her, she would be lost to him again. With that thought, no more debate was needed. She was much more important than any scheme to take Lockwood down.

"Okay," J.R. finally acquiesced. "Your brilliant husband took out a loan on Lockwood Entertainment for about a fifth of what it's worth. Now he's defaulted and the loan has been called in. I've made arrangements to assume the debt. The company will be mine in a day or two."

Sue Ellen blankly stared at him trying to comprehend the chain of events he had just given her so succinctly.

"I'll be damned," J.R. marveled, the look of confusion on her face making him realize she didn't know how far her husband had slipped. "You didn't know he was in trouble, did you?" Then he realized something equally as important. "That's why he was so upset tonight about being investigated. He didn't want you to find out."

"What the hell have you done to him, J.R.?" She angrily replied.

"Me?" The accusation caught him off guard. "I didn't do a damn thing!"

"Then how did you find out about the loan? Did you set him up? Because no banker would allow you to just assume the debt unless you were the one financing it."

"I don't give a damn about owning Lockwood Entertainment," J.R. coolly responded, now on the defensive. "Hell, up until this afternoon, I didn't give a damn about Lockwood. But not even I would use mob money to finance a deal."

Sue Ellen visibly paled, her gaze becoming distant as she mentally merged the pieces of both J.R.'s plan and Don's financial missteps into one cohesive, appalling realization. Don must have gone to his old school mate Jake Jackson for the loan. Jake ran a local book and she had always suspected he had ties to British organized crime.

"Don was right," she finally said, glaring back at J.R. "That rat detective of yours has been working on this longer than just the past few days, hasn't he?"

"No, Don is not right," J.R. echoed, irritated at Lockwood being mentioned in any kind of good light. "I didn't call Ratagan 'til after you and I met up at Harrods. He updated the file on Lockwood then."

"You have a file on him?" Sue Ellen was dismayed.

"I started one back when you were seein' him in Dallas," he casually replied.

"Why do you even bother, J.R.," she said wearily.

"Standard operatin' procedure, honey. You know that. Everyone who is even remotely a threat is investigated."

"Don is not a threat! He never was." She angrily answered back. "I can't believe this. You acted like you couldn't wait to get rid of me back in Dallas then I find out you were playing the jealous, jilted husband and had the man I turned to investigated. Now you've done it again! What's the point, J.R.?"

"What's the point?" J.R.'s tone was now deadly serious. "You are … and John Ross. If you're gonna live over here with Lockwood then I wanna know what he's up to." She looked away from him. "Sue Ellen, supposin' Lockwood had defaulted on his loan. What do you think would have happened when his creditors came callin' for repayment while he was off somewhere playin' Mister Big-Shot director? Don't you see how alone you and John Ross are in the city?"

"Damn it," Sue Ellen whispered, frightened by the fact that J.R. was right. She looked back at him, the anger in her eyes making them darker. "How much does he owe?"

"Half a million dollars."

Sue Ellen shook her head in disbelief, reacting as if she had been hit. It took her a moment to recover; the details about her husband just kept getting worse.

"You're right," she quietly replied after a moment. "That isn't a fifth of what it was worth when I turned the company over to him." She shook her head again. "He told me everything was under control."

The disappointment and uncertainty in her voice should have been a victory for J.R. It was anything but.

"Darlin'," he gently said. "I never meant for you to find out this way. I thought you knew."

"And I'm sure that makes the deal even sweeter for you," she snapped back.

"No," he quietly responded, stung by the contempt in her voice. "I never factored you into this deal."

"You go after my husband, you go after me," she said bitterly.

"Fine. We can play it that way." The contained fury in J.R.'s voice made it drop to an ominous level. "If you're gonna draw lines in the sand, then so be it. But damn it, Sue Ellen! Don't you realize what could have happened if I hadn't stumbled onto this? These people don't foreclose on your house or have your car towed away when you default. They make an example of you and strike back where it hurts the most. Besides Lockwood Entertainment, what is the one thing that means the most to your husband? If he's a smart man, it's you. And what means the most to you? John Ross. I'll be damned if I'll apologize for interferin'."

Tears welled up in Sue Ellen's eyes as the seriousness of the situation crashed down on her, along with her disappointment in Don.

"Call it fate or destiny," J.R. said, trying to gentle his tone. "But whatever it was that brought me to London, I'm grateful. I hate to think what would have happened if I hadn't found out."

Sue Ellen quickly wiped the tears from her eyes and looked up at J.R.

"Let me pay off the debt, J.R."

"Why? So you can give Lockwood back his company as a Christmas present?" The sarcastic tone dropped from his voice as quickly as it had appeared. "He is not gonna be rewarded for this fiasco."

The mockery in his voice didn't stop Sue Ellen. If anything, it made her more determined. All personal feelings stopped and her business acumen took over. Just like she had learned years ago from the man she now faced.

"If I reacquire Lockwood Entertainment then I'll be able to control him a whole hell of a lot better than you could if you just destroyed it outright. Besides, having a little leverage against him might be useful one day."

That sounded like a move out of his own playbook and it impressed J.R. "Damn, woman. Where'd you learn to play this game?"

"Where do you think? You gave me one hell of an education."

"Well, I'm impressed."

J.R. gazed at her for a moment, taking in every fine detail of her face. She was one exceptionally bright, beautiful lady who was completely in charge of her life now. And this previously unknown self-reliance and determination he was discovering in her turned him on as much as her touch ever did. If only he had known what an astute businesswoman she was, he would have brought her in on his business long ago. Or at least consulted with her. Damn, the pillow talk they could have had about the Cartel back in Dallas.

"I can't let you buy it outright," J.R. finally continued. "The deal has already been made. But go ahead and make arrangements to buy it back from me once I've acquired it."

He knew the best revenge would be turning the company back over to Sue Ellen. Lockwood wouldn't be able to control her – hell, he wasn't even sure if he could control her himself. But Lockwood would now be stuck wondering about his own destiny and who was controlling him.

"Under what terms?" Sue Ellen warily asked, expecting the worst but prepared for it.

"I'm payin' it off at one million dollars, just to make sure the debt is settled outright with no repercussions. So, factor in a twenty percent profit margin and we'll call it good."

The profit margin was outrageous and J.R. knew it. But once he said it, it seemed to break the tension between them. A faint trace of a smile showed in Sue Ellen's expression.

"Twenty percent," she replied, reluctantly amused at his audacity. "You basically just told me you deserve what equates to a finders fee and you want twenty percent. You'll get ten percent, which is the going rate."

"All right, then. It's a deal. I was gonna give it to you for five, but ten will do just fine." A flash of temper shot through Sue Ellen's eyes but J.R. headed her off. "Always start low when you're negotiatin', darlin'. Always start low."

Sue Ellen arched an eyebrow as she studied him. Rarely did J.R. shy away while being observed by a rival but he did then. No one had ever been able to see right through him the way she did.

He found he didn't mind, though. He actually enjoyed it.


	22. Part 22

LONDON RAIN, Part 22

It had been a long time since Sue Ellen and J.R. sat down together and talked. And they talked for a quite a while that night … about everything … about nothing. What surprised them both is how much they enjoyed each other's company.

"I can't remember the last time I just sat and visited with somebody," J.R. said with a smile. "It feels damn nice."

Sue Ellen returned his smile. "Yes, it does. And we haven't had one argument."

"That's gotta be a new record," J.R. laughed. "Reminds me of the way we used to talk, before we got married. We used to spend hours on the phone … or sittin' on the porch of your mamma's house in Austin."

"Mmm-hmm," she nodded at the recollection. "I used to love our talks. I didn't know anyone quite as charming or as funny as you were back then." Her smile slowly faded. "I always wondered why that stopped after we got married."

J.R. thought about her comment and heavily sighed. "I know exactly why it stopped. Daddy made me president of Ewing Oil and I didn't see much else after that. All I cared about was makin' him proud of me."

His brutally honest comment saddened Sue Ellen. So much had been sacrificed at the alter of Ewing Oil over the years and their marriage had been at the top of the list.

J.R. saw her reaction, knew the reason for it. It was about damn time he started to make it up to her.

"Listen, Sue Ellen," he said, all traces of his usual arrogance now gone. "About the deal with Lockwood Entertainment. I'll make it right, I promise. I'm not about to let anything happen to you or John Ross now."

Sue Ellen was comforted by his words. He could have been vicious about the entire situation with Don. He could have taken over Lockwood Entertainment and sold it off in insignificant little packets. No doubt he would have done it in the past. But she honestly believed that for once he was placing her and John Ross above all else.

"I hope you mean that, J.R."

"I do. You'll see." He paused for a moment and rubbed his eyes. "Now, I hope we're done talkin' about Lockwood. Just mentionin' that man puts me to sleep."

Sue Ellen reluctantly smiled at both his sarcasm and bravado. He held control of her future yet lightly cast if off simply to put her at ease. He succeeded.

"Just one more thing," she said. "Are you really going to let me buy back Lockwood Entertainment?"

"'Course, I will. I wouldn't go back on that now."

She stood up and took a few short, exquisite steps towards him. "Then let's shake on it."

Sue Ellen held out her hand in an age-old business gesture. She knew that in Texas a handshake was considered an unwritten law that was not to be broken.

J.R. grinned, admiring her nerve then stood up and took her hand. They shook on the deal, sealing the pact between them. But before Sue Ellen could withdraw her hand, J.R. bent down and kissed it, never taking his eyes off her.

Sue Ellen was still numb from the difficult news about Don and Lockwood Entertainment and the kiss sent a much-needed pulse of warmth through her body. She gently pulled her hand away from J.R. but didn't back away. Instead, she put her fingers under his chin, allowing her to tip his head up so she could examine the cut and slight bruise on his lip where Don had hit him earlier. When she lightly touched the bruise with the pad of her thumb, it was J.R.'s turn to experience a tingle of electricity down his spine.

"I didn't even ask you … does that hurt much?" She said.

"No." It was all J.R. could manage. Her touched rendered him speechless.

"I'm sorry it happened. Don has a terrible temper."

"Don is a …"

"J.R.," she quickly interrupted, knowing he was about to release a stream of expletives. "No more discussing Don, remember?"

"Why on earth did you ever marry that English idiot and move half way around the world with him?" J.R. asked, breaking the rule once more.

Without the slightest hesitation, she dropped her hand and had a question for him in reply. "Why did you deliberately dump me for Kimberly Cryder in your pursuit for West Star?"

J.R. looked down, away from her gaze, knowing she had gotten the better of him. He had no desire to argue.

"That was not one of my better moments."

"No, it wasn't."

Sue Ellen observed him briefly and decided it was time to tell him exactly how she felt. A moment she had dreamed about for years.

"J.R., for a smart man, you can be so monumentally stupid at times." He quickly looked up at her, surprised by her criticism. She continued, unflinching. "All you had to do was tell me about Kimberly's plan and I would have gladly helped you set her up. We could have made a killing on that West Star deal, if you would have just trusted me."

"Ouch, that hurts," he said flatly.

"It damn well should."

Defeated, J.R. threw his hands up in the air in surrender and walked away, turning his back to her.

"So many regrets, so many mistakes," he wearily said. He leaned his arm against the fireplace mantle and rubbed his eyes again. Then he looked back at her. "How do I even begin to apologize to you?"

Had she actually heard the word 'apologize' from him?

"Do you mean that?" She asked.

J.R. looked away from her again, unable to withstand her gaze. He needed her forgiveness – for so many things – but knew he didn't deserve it.

"I do," he nodded. He paused for a moment, watching the flames dance in the fireplace, then continued. "Pushin' you away to appease Kimberly … that was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life."

"Then why did you do it, J.R.?" She pleaded, finally asking the question that had echoed in her mind for years. "We were so close … so connected during that time after John Ross had been kidnapped. More than we ever had been our entire married life. How could you just throw it all away for Kimberly Cryder?"

"I wanted back into the oil business so bad …" He hesitated, appalled at his own reason. "It all seemed worth it at the time."

"You never did place a very high value on me. Not when it came to oil."

J.R.'s gaze snapped back to her face and he saw the hurt expression that matched the pain in her voice.

"On the contrary. I thought I'd be able to win you back after it was all said and done, just like always. What a major miscalculation that was. Before I knew it, you were off with Nicholas Pearce and hell bent on destroyin' me."

Nicholas Pearce. That was a name she hadn't heard in a long time, especially not from J.R. Sue Ellen took a deep breath and looked away, willing herself not to cry. None of it was lost on J.R.

"Sue Ellen … I'm sorry. I …"

"No, J.R. … don't. What happened with Nick … we were both to blame."

"I never wanted him to die," J.R. quietly added. "And I'd take it all back in a heartbeat if I could. That moment haunts me to this day."

There were no words. The painful emotions from the memories of that night along with J.R.'s unexpected apology and Don's alleged betrayal mixed in an ambiguous quagmire of thought and feelings. Tears filled her eyes, ran down her cheeks. She turned away; she didn't want J.R. to see. But she should have known better. He noticed immediately.

Frustrated, J.R. looked away from her as he made a fist and pounded it down on the mantle. He longed to take her in his arms, wipe her tears away, kiss her until she only felt his love and no more of the pain he had caused her. But he was frozen on the spot where he stood. Comforting her now was not possible, not when he was responsible for the majority of her pain. And that realization hurt him deeply.

"Honey, I just want us to get to a point where I no longer hurt you," he tenderly said. "I know I've got a lot of makin' up to do before that can happen. I've gotta prove to you I can." Then he looked back at her. "Just let me try, Sue Ellen."

"J.R., I can't …" she hesitated, her voice unsteady, trying to find the words. She had heard the same appeal so many times before. Trusted him too many times and had always been betrayed in return. "Everything is just so complicated right now."

"I know. And it's been a hell of a night for you. But just think about it, will you?"

His voice was so soothing Sue Ellen couldn't help but look over at him. He rewarded her with a gentle smile. Yet when they looked into each other's eyes, they found a new understanding. It was the kind that happened between two people who knew each other so well, the kind that didn't have to be spoken. With that one look, more emotional baggage was discarded and replaced with a little more trust and a lot less uncertainty. And both felt as if years of hiding from ghosts in their past had finally come to an end.

Sue Ellen was the first to speak.

"J.R.," she softly said. "I am just so numb. Mind if I bend one of the rules I made for tonight?"

"Not at all, darlin'," J.R. sweetly smiled. "What's a rule for if you can't bend it a little?"

"Kiss me like you did this afternoon."

The directness of both the request and her gaze knocked the breath out of him but J.R. didn't hesitate to comply. He slowly crossed over to her. His hands went to her face, framing it then he leaned down to meet her until they were almost touching. He paused for the space of a heartbeat, two, and finally kissed her, gently at first, waiting for her response, needing to know if it was what she really wanted.

Her mouth opened, inviting him closer, and he kissed her as deeply as he could. She returned the kiss like she was starving for all the warmth he could give her. Then it was over, over on so many different levels. And they both knew it.

"You've got to leave London, J.R.," she whispered against his lips.

He nodded. "I know I do."

He lightly kissed her again then tipped her head down and placed a small kiss on her forehead.

"I'll take care of this business with Lockwood Entertainment," he continued, "then I'll be on a plane the next morning. I promise."

J.R. studied her face, his eyes following the sleek contours of her cheekbones down to her mouth. He longed to kiss her again but he wanted so much more than a kiss. He wanted her in ways he had never wanted another woman. He wanted her forever. Instead, he reluctantly released her and took a step back.

"I wouldn't trade this time in London for anything, Sue Ellen," he added. "I found a whole new appreciation for both you and my son. Thank you for that."

Too many emotions were surfacing inside her all, stealing her ability to verbally respond to him. Instead, she closed the distance between them and pulled J.R. against her, hugging him tightly. He reciprocated by wrapping his arms around her.

After a moment, Sue Ellen released him. When she looked up, J.R. was surprised at how tired she looked.

"You look exhausted, darlin'. You better turn in."

She nodded. "You, too." Then she took his hand and led him to the bedroom. "Come on, it's a huge bed. We can all share."

For the first time since he was a teenager, J.R. suddenly became self-conscious and hesitated at a woman's touch.

"Yeah, well what about John Ross?"

"He sleeps so deep, he won't even know we're there," she said as she continued to lead him forward. "Besides, I'm not quite ready to let you go yet."

As they entered the bedroom, Sue Ellen picked up the extra blanket from the foot of the bed and spread it out over the covers on the opposite end of her sleeping son. She gently sunk down onto the bed and John Ross didn't stir.

All J.R. could do was watch; he didn't have a clue what to do next. The unexpected turn of events had left him dumbfounded.

Sue Ellen looked up at him and smiled. "Come here, J.R. I don't bite."

Her whisper sent chills down his spine but he took her outstretched hand. She guided him down next to her and placed the blanket over both of them. Then she took his hand once more and turned onto her side, wrapping his arm around her like a blanket. Like she had done so many times when they were married.

It was her favorite way to sleep and J.R. was deeply touched by the familiarity of the gesture. She trusted him again. She was allowing him to hold her again. He smiled as he gently pulled her against him, her shoulder blades resting against his chest, just as he had always held her.

"There," she sleepily whispered. "This is nicer than the couch, isn't it?"

J.R. kissed the top of her head. "More than you'll ever know."

John Ross unconsciously shifted toward the sound of his parents' voices, bringing him within arms length of them. He looked so peaceful, so much like the sweet little baby boy they both remembered.

J.R. reached over and gently placed his hand on John Ross' head, needing to touch the son he was so proud of. Sue Ellen reached out and put her hand on his, strengthening the bond between the three. If only for a moment, J.R. had his family back and he silently thanked God for the opportunity. He must have done something right. Finally.

With that, he took Sue Ellen's hand in his and wrapped their arms around her waist again. Before long, they were both sound asleep.


	23. Part 23

LONDON RAIN, Part 23

It was early the next morning when J.R. entered the dark living room and carefully approached the couch. As expected, he found Sue Ellen asleep there. Sometime during the night she had left him and John Ross and he had hoped this is where she had gone instead of going back home.

When she slipped out of his embrace and off the bed, he had pretended to be asleep, understanding her reason to leave. He knew only too well how she hated infidelity, even if only in appearance and even if Lockwood didn't deserve her loyalty. But damn, letting her go had been difficult. Having her asleep at his side with John Ross nearby had felt wonderful. It had felt like home.

Looking down on her now, her features gently illuminated by the soft light of dawn just appearing through the window, he was struck once again by how truly beautiful she was. Her dark hair framed her face with several wayward locks lying across her forehead and cheek. He longed to reach down and brush them away, if only for the chance to touch her. At least he could look at her all he wanted.

As his gaze left her face and slowly followed the curves of her long, sleek outline, a mischievous grin slowly lit his expression as memories of so many mornings while they were together came back to him. Waking her up with a gentle kiss on the shoulder … the ear … the way she responded. The lady could be such a tiger when properly seduced.

Too bad there wasn't a damn thing he could do about that now.

J.R. forced himself to look away from her with a frustrated sigh then crossed over to the fireplace and turned it on, hoping to banish the sudden chill of so many regrets. Yet as he watched the flames come to life and spark higher, his thoughts reluctantly returned to the past. How many times had he turned from her, thrown away what truly mattered to satisfy impulsive, spur-of-the-moment desires? How many of those desires could he even remember now? He searched his memories. Not many. At least none that mattered. Then he looked longingly back at Sue Ellen. Because of that, he now had nothing, especially not her.

He wearily rubbed his eyes with his thumb and index finger, struck by the irony of the situation once again. The two people who did matter were the two people he had hurt the most in his unyielding conquest of anything that caught his eye. But they had come back to him. After all that had happened, Sue Ellen and John Ross were there with him now. Somehow, he had to find a way to take full advantage of the opportunity.

Sue Ellen stirred and looked over at the fire, squinting at the brightness. Then she sensed the tall form standing next to it.

"J.R.?" She softly called out.

"Shhh, it's okay," he whispered reassuringly. "It was a little cold in here so I turned up the fire."

"What time is it?"

"Just after six." J.R. approached the couch once more and sat down on the table across from the couch, facing her. "Did you have trouble sleepin' in the other room?"

"Um-hmmm," she muttered sleepily. "It was a little too familiar."

"Is that a good thing or bad thing?"

"It was uncomfortable, considering I'm married to another man."

"Huh." His short, indignant reply covered the curse he silently uttered about her husband. "I don't know what you see in him, honey. He's not your type."

"Oh really," Sue Ellen replied, now fully awake and annoyed. She propped herself up on an elbow to face him. "And what exactly is my type?"

J.R. smiled his best smile. "I can think of a charmin', temporarily displaced oilman who would just love to keep company with you."

He was charming all right. So much so it disguised his unerring ability to flirt his way into a subtle seduction. But Sue Ellen knew his method all too well and was ready for it.

"Oh no, I swore off oilmen a long time ago," she softly reprimanded with a smile. "They are nothing but trouble."

"Well what about that sawed-off excuse of a man you're married to?" J.R. replied, irritated she was amused by his proposition rather than intrigued. He gingerly rubbed the bruise on his lip where Lockwood had hit him the day before. "With a temper like that, he can't be all that wonderful to live with. Hell, I bet you can't even wear heels when you're around him, which is a damn shame considerin' what they do for those legs of yours."

"His height has nothing to do with it," Sue Ellen drawled, maintaining a deceptively sweet tone in her voice while assuming his flirty manner. "Would you really like to know what I find so attractive about him, darlin'?"

She had subtly manipulated the verbal exchange back into her favor, just like he taught her to do, knowing he would automatically think the worst. His response didn't disappoint her.

"No!" J.R. replied a little more loudly than he wanted to, fearing she would tell him.

Sue Ellen gave him a victorious grin and J.R. realized he had fallen into her trap. She was one of the few people who knew how to manipulate him and she had done it well, instantly intensifying his attraction to her and dousing his playful mood.

"Leave him, Sue Ellen." His voice was now a mixture of frustration and desire. "Marry me again. We can move back to Dallas or anywhere you want. I just want us to be together. I want us to be a family again."

"You're serious." Sue Ellen said flatly as she studied him, a range of emotions flickering across her face.

"Hell yes, I'm serious. We don't belong in Europe. We belong in Texas, all three of us … together."

"J.R., don't," she sadly replied. "That's not only unbelievable it's impossible."

"Anything is possible when we're together, honey," he gently coaxed. "Besides, are you really happy with Lockwood?"

"That's not the point. Even if I were free, I wouldn't marry you again. Twice was enough. I won't do it again."

J.R. looked at her and knew he couldn't win that argument. The odds were stacked against him. Odds he had stacked against himself.

"Damn it," he softly swore and looked away, disappointed.

"Listen to me," Sue Ellen said as she reached over and took his hand. "The past few days have been so good. Why can't we just keep building on that for now?"

J.R. looked back at her and tried to smile. "'Cause I'm gonna have one hell of a time lettin' you two go this mornin'."

"Well, we don't have to leave right away," she replied wistfully, searching for some way to lighten the conversation. "So how 'bout if we take what time we have and just enjoy the hell out of it?"

His mood finally broke at hearing her put her own unique spin on one of his favorite sayings and J.R. smiled again.

"All right," he finally conceded and wrapped her hand in his. "I'll take what I can get."

Sue Ellen nearly recoiled at the inviting warmth of his touch. The impulse to accept it and all he had offered was so strong it frightened her. It was the same reason she had left his side during the night. Yes, they had put a lot behind them the past few days but after so many years of betrayal and bitterness, it was still unsettling that she could feel anything more than a cool civility towards J.R. Yet there she was, feeling a deep attraction to him again on so many levels. She silently scolded herself, knowing she had to shake off the feeling. Giving in to anything even remotely romantic with him would be dangerous. Kissing him last night had proved that. It had shattered her defenses, allowing her to sleep next to him instead of on the couch where she belonged. She couldn't make that mistake again. She would somehow have to find a way to maintain the friendly, comfortable existence of the past few days that had been so good for both them and John Ross.

"You know," she remarked as she briefly tightened her grip on his hand before letting it go, "you're a fairly decent human being when you're away from the oil business. If I had know that, I would have had you kidnapped and taken away from Dallas years ago."

J.R. leaned in closer to her, resting his elbows on his knees. "It's not too late, honey. Paris, Nice, Monte Carlo, Vienna, Rome … all of Europe is right here waitin' for us. Take me anywhere you wanna go."

She was momentarily taken aback by the blunt proposition. Being friendly was obviously not what he had in mind. But before she could chastise him, John Ross padded out of the shadows, making her grateful for the distraction.

"Mom … Dad," he yawned as he headed toward them. "Aren't you two gonna go to sleep tonight?"

J.R. and Sue Ellen looked at each other, exchanged knowing glances, then laughed at their son's sleepy oblivion.

"We have been," Sue Ellen grinned. "Its morning already, sweetheart."

"Morning?" John Ross said with a start, now fully awake. "So what are we gonna do today? Where are we gonna go?"

Their son's sudden burst of energy and rapid succession of questions made J.R. and Sue Ellen laugh again.

"Now hold on, pardner," J.R. said with a grin. "At least let your mamma and me get a cup of coffee before you start grillin' us!"

"Where is it?" John Ross replied excitedly. "I'll get it for you!"

"I was just on my way to get some," J.R. said as he stood up

"You're going to make us coffee?" Sue Ellen remarked with a skeptical arch of her eyebrow.

"Well, I'm gonna call the butler and have her bring us some. Does that count?"

"That's my J.R.," Sue Ellen replied automatically without considering the meaning, her attention quickly turning to John Ross. But the comment meant everything to J.R.

Sue Ellen sat up and motioned for John Ross to come share her blanket as J.R. went to the phone and picked it up. He looked back to see Sue Ellen wrap her arm around John Ross and smooth his hair. It was such a familiar gesture, something she had done since he was a baby. J.R. turned and dialed a number, unable to contain a wide grin. He had to find a way to get them away from Lockwood. Hopefully the takeover of his company would be just the start.

"Good morning, Mr. Ewing," Marian the butler responded on the other end of the line. "How may I assist you?"

"Mornin', Marian!" J.R. said brightly "Say, would you mind bringin' up a pot of the closest thing you have to American coffee. And I don't know … some orange juice, maybe some pancakes and scrambled eggs. Aw hell, just bring up whatever sounds good for breakfast!" J.R. looked back at John Ross and Sue Ellen. "My family and I are ready to get this day started."


	24. Part 24

LONDON RAIN, Part 24

The morning sky was a brilliant blue, the sunlight making the stately gray buildings sparkle as the snow gave London a glowing, magical feeling. Even the frantic pace of the city's residents had slowed as they stopped to enjoy the fresh powder while it lasted.

Watching from the window of J.R.'s hotel suite, Sue Ellen softly laughed as any available space in the park was used to make snowmen, throw snowballs or trace angels. It reminded her of a scene from an old-fashioned glittery Christmas card and was just as sweet as two figures she recognized stood out in the crowd.

J.R. and John Ross had joined the impromptu snow carnival and watching J.R. trying to stay vertical in his cowboy boots as John Ross got the better of him in a snowball fight was extremely amusing. Sue Ellen giggled again. Watching them play together had always been one of her greatest pleasures. It was a rare privilege.

Very few people ever saw this side of J.R., the playful, loving father who would go to great lengths to entertain his son. And John Ross obviously loved having his father's full attention again. He looked so happy out there. If for that reason alone, Sue Ellen was grateful J.R. was there even if he had inconveniently arrived in London unannounced. She would have never guessed his presence could have been so good for John Ross. She even had to reluctantly admit it had been good for her, too.

Dinner, the poker game, the presents they had brought her from Harrods … both J.R. and John Ross had been so charming last night as they worked her in tandem. And sleeping between them had been such a sweet, pure moment. John Ross hadn't stirred all night, just as she had predicted. She wasn't sure if he even knew she and J.R. had been there. Perhaps it was better that way. But she would secretly treasure the moment even if she did have to end it so soon.

Waking up with J.R.'s arm wrapped around her had felt good. Too good. Even after so much time apart and the terrible things he had done to each other, the aura of power he projected, both physically and mentally, still gave her a sense of warmth and protection. But it also heightened the dangerous sexual vulnerability his presence still generated in her. The kind that could leave her unable to deny anything he wanted, just as it always had. When J.R. wanted her, truly wanted her, she felt truly feminine … vibrant … alive.

Sue Ellen involuntarily inhaled, quickly banishing the reckless sexual thoughts as she looked down at her left hand and fingered the diamond ring there. She was Don's equal in every way. He had always encouraged the idea that they were partners and after years of being a trophy wife, it felt good to be standing on the same level as her husband instead of being looked down on. But why did waking up next to Don feel so different than waking up next to J.R.?

The honesty of that thought startled her. Don was a good lover, very sweet and considerate, even if never as wildly passionate as she hoped or encouraged him to be. She had always wondered why he was so reserved but after living several years in London, she had learned emotional remoteness was a way of life for the British and had been for centuries. It was also deeply ingrained in her husband.

What a difference there was between the proper, refined British and the lively, loud Texans she had grown up with. It was no wonder she was attracted to J.R. at the moment, she reasoned. She was homesick, that was all, and he was the closest thing to Texas in London. Yet when she spotted J.R.'s tall form in the park once more, she had to reluctantly admit to herself there was more to it than that.

The off-balance, somewhat self-deprecating J.R. who had shown up in London a few days ago was so far removed from the despicable tyrant she had left back in Dallas. In just a few short days he had erased most of the anger and distrust she held for him. Not that she wasn't naïve enough to believe he had changed. He had put on this kind of impressive dog-and-pony show for her too many times to count and there was no way his good behavior would last. But there was something appealing about his current vulnerability.

Perhaps it was because it reminded her of the three years between the Miss Texas pageant and their wedding day when oil didn't matter to J.R. She still wondered which was the true J.R. … the sweet, charming suitor she had fallen in love with during their courtship or the mean, cheating bastard he had warped into to impress his father and gain control of Ewing Oil.

As Sue Ellen watched him playing with his son, she hoped the J.R. she had fallen in love with wasn't just some fantasy she had created all those years ago. She hoped the sweetness was still there somewhere underneath the cold, calculating persona. Judging by their son's reaction to him as they played in the snow, maybe there was hope.

Several loud raps on the door interrupted her thoughts and she turned to answer it. It was probably the day butler arriving to check in as J.R. told her he would.

Across the street in the park, J.R. settled down on a bench to read the morning paper, having surrendered the snowball fight to John Ross's unerring aim. But he soon found his gaze wandering from the paper out to where John Ross was building a snowman. J.R. softly chuckled. The boy had more energy than a wildcatter after a well strike.

A wildcatter after a well strike … that comparison greatly amused J.R. because of the connection back to Jock. John Ross was certainly living up to being his granddaddy's namesake. Even as young as the boy was, he had quite a few of Jock's characteristics. It was more than his strong physical build, though. It was the way he wasn't afraid to speak his mind or take risks. His scheme to leave Southfork and actually pulling it off had proved that. Yet John Ross also had his mother's polish and refinement and J.R. was secretly grateful for that. The Ewing ability to wheel and deal combined with Sue Ellen's sophisticated charm would take the boy far in the oil business if he chose to accept his rightful place as heir.

The heir to the Ewing Empire. John Ross was the link that held the Ewings together, at least the Ewings J.R. cared about. He was certainly the only thing that kept Sue Ellen connected to the family. Funny how their only child who had come into the world surrounded by so much turmoil had become the only stable thing in their lives. Plus he was the eternal bridge between them even as all their other connections had been so haphazardly torched in their continuous game of one-upmanship.

J.R. thought about that for a moment then softly laughed. Damn, the woman was still such a challenge yet she generated a feeling inside him he'd rarely known … a loyalty that had only been extended to his father and mother and now his son. Because when it came right down to it, no matter what happened between them, there was nothing he wouldn't do for her. Why he had never told her that, he didn't know, but maybe if he could convince her and John Ross to stay just one more night …

A solid "whap!" came against his shoulder and snow sprayed over his coat, hat and the paper. J.R. shook his head and more snow rained down from the brim of his cowboy hat. He looked over to see John Ross grinning wickedly, another snowball in his hand and ready to fire.

"Oh, sneak attack, huh?" J.R. playfully growled as he dropped the paper and quickly reached to his side. He arched his arm back and sent a snowball hurtling toward John Ross, which exploded harmlessly against the boy's chest, making him yelp with both surprise and laughter.

John Ross hadn't seen the stockpile of snowballs his father had prepared while he had been busy building his snowman. The game was on again, though, and that was all that mattered. He released the other snowball towards his father even as he laughed excitedly, bending down to gather another handful of snow. Another snowball from his father splattered against his arm. One thing was for sure … he had misjudged how good his dad was at this. He rarely missed even though he never threw hard enough to hurt.

Even as the snowball fight expanded with both of them scrabbling to pack and throw as many snowballs as possible, J.R. knew it was a losing battle. He had years of experience from soundly beating Bobby at the game but John Ross had the youthful physical conditioning and control of an athlete. For every snowball J.R. threw, John Ross countered with 3 or 4 more, all of which exploded into powder before causing any real damage.

They drew closer and closer to each other, now having time only to throw handfuls of snow while exchanging playful barbs and laughs. They were soon both covered with snow, their clothing soaked.

J.R. held up his hand in surrender, which John Ross accepted before being pulled into a surprise bear hug that immobilized him. His father won after all and they both laughed as J.R. ruffled his son's hair and smoothed it with the same motion.

"Gotcha, son," J.R. grinned.

"But I so got you with that last one, Dad," John Ross playfully boasted as J.R. released him.

"Yeah and just look us. I'm gonna get it all over again because you're mamma is gonna kill me for lettin' you get so wet out in this cold," J.R. replied with a laugh, trying to catch his breath. "How 'bout if we head back to the hotel and get warmed up?"

"Okay, let's go!"

John Ross ran off, obviously feeling no physical effects from the snowball fight, and J.R. rolled his eyes. God, he suddenly felt ancient and the hotel seemed miles off to his cold, stiff arms and legs. Plus he was still slightly out of breath. Then he laughed and brushed the remaining snow from his coat. Sue Ellen was going to give him hell but she was also going have to help him take off his soaked cowboy boots. That was something she hadn't done in a very long time and something he had always enjoyed immensely.

Within minutes, the bedraggled father/son team entered the hotel room, flushed and laughing. But before they could remove their coats they both immediately sensed something had changed.

Before J.R. could call out her name, Sue Ellen approached them, her face pale under the tension in her expression.

"What's wrong, darlin'?" J.R. asked even as he saw the problem standing across the room, next to the fireplace.

Don Lockwood smiled sarcastically at J.R. and waved.


	25. Part 25

LONDON RAIN, Part 25

The tension in the room was overwhelming as Sue Ellen quickly stepped over to John Ross, purposefully avoiding J.R.'s questioning gaze, and smoothed back the wet locks from her son's forehead.

"You're soaked," she quietly said.

"Yeah, Mom, but we had the best time!" John Ross answered excitedly, not yet having seen his stepfather across the room. "Did you see us from the window?"

"I did, sweetheart. Now we need to get you home so you can take a bath and get warmed up."

"Home?" John Ross scowled.

"That's not necessary, Sue Ellen," J.R. cut in, realizing the joy he had felt at having them with him was now at an end.

"John Ross, how about going into the other room for a minute?" Sue Ellen said to John Ross. "I need to talk to your father."

J.R. reached across and placed his hand protectively on his son's shoulder and held him back.

"The boy stays here," J.R. replied, his voice suddenly like cold steel.

Sensing his father's mood change, John Ross looked up at him, puzzled. "Dad, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, John Ross," Sue Ellen tried to soothe him while glaring at J.R. "Now please, go wait for us in the other room."

"Not until you tell me what's going on!" John Ross stubbornly answered her.

"Do as you mother says, John Ross," came the cutting British accent from across the room.

John Ross looked out around his mother and was both angry and disappointed to see Don walking towards them.

"What's he doing here?" He snapped at his mother.

"I came to offer you and your mother an apology for last night so I can take you home," Don interjected. "I missed you both a great deal and I am truly sorry about what happened." John Ross refused to look at him, purposefully ignoring the apology, and it greatly irritated Don even though it didn't matter. At least he tried to be civil with the boy. "Now, we need to speak to your father, so please wait for us in the other room."

J.R. was about to object to Lockwood bossing his son around when John Ross spoke up for himself.

"Go to hell!" The boy angrily shouted.

"John Ross!" Came Sue Ellen's quick reprimand at her son's rude and unexpected curse.

She reached out to take him by the shoulder and move him to the other room but J.R. countered swiftly, pulling John Ross to his side to shield him while placing a strong hand on Sue Ellen's shoulder, holding her back.

"The boy stays," J.R. calmly reaffirmed as he met and held her angry stare. "Whatever you two have to say to me, you can say in front of him. He's an intelligent young man now, capable of makin' up his own mind. Plus I have a feelin' this impacts him just as much as any of us."

John Ross was instantly filled with pride and confidence at his father's words even though he knew it greatly angered his mother.

Sue Ellen was indeed angry that J.R. had placed John Ross in middle. His stand seemed more like a dare to her rather than a show of support for their son.

"Don't do this," she genuinely pleaded with J.R.

"Oh, I'm not gonna do anything 'til you tell me what the hell is going on," J.R. replied tightly. He looked over at Lockwood then back at Sue Ellen. "Tell me what he said."

"This isn't the time or place, J.R." She replied.

"I leave you alone in this room, with everything supposedly settled between us then come back an hour later to find Lockwood here and you wantin' to take our son and leave. I deserve an explanation."

"Lockwood Entertainment isn't in any danger," she finally answered. "It never was."

"Is that so?" J.R. wondered aloud after he took a moment to observe her. Lockwood had obviously found a way to cover his tracks last night then spun her one hell of a tall tale to make himself look good again. The only problem was J.R. was going to need time to prove it and the way things looked at the moment, time was one thing he didn't have. "That makes it his word against mine."

There were shards of doubt piercing Sue Ellen about Don's story and subsequent apology. J.R.'s cool reaction reinforced it. But out of the two men she had to give her husband the benefit of the doubt.

"Why the elaborate story last night, J.R.?" She earnestly asked, needing some kind of confirmation.

"I told you," J.R. replied, neither confirming nor denying the accusation. "You and John Ross are all that matters."

Sue Ellen shook her head and looked away, doubt and confusion now consuming her. J.R. turned his icy glare on Don.

"Congratulations, Lockwood," J.R. calmly continued. "You must've done a whole lotta scramblin' last night to get yourself outta this one."

"You truly are devious, Ewing," Don replied, coming forward to stand at Sue Ellen's side. "And delusional. Just accept that she is out of your reach and happy with me."

"Oh yeah," J.R. sarcastically scoffed. "She looks deliriously happy with you at the moment."

"I'm warning you," Don quickly interjected, obviously annoyed at the comment. "Stay away from us."

J.R. nearly laughed out loud at the small man's idle threat. "Lockwood, don't prove how dumb you really are by threatenin' me. Now apologize for makin' a scene like you said you were gonna to Sue Ellen and my son or else you can get the hell outta here and leave us alone."

"You honestly believe you stand a chance with her, don't you? My God, man, I thought I knew the limit to your arrogance."

"Do you now?" J.R. casually asked hoping to bait Lockwood into more loose-lipped boasting that might give him the information he needed to fight back. "Why, because you directed that piece of trash film that was supposedly about me?"

"Exactly," Don said with a smirk. "I know what makes you tick."

"Huh." The half-amused, half-irritated tone of J.R.'s non-verbal reply hung in the air as he observed the man with a cool intensity that inwardly made Don squirm. "From what I saw of that film, you don't know much of anything, especially about makin' films. No wonder you sunk your company."

Don's arrogant demeanor quickly dropped at the insult and anger flashed through his expression. J.R. knew he now had the advantage and pushed it even farther.

"You don't know nothin' about me, boy." J.R. quickly added.

Sue Ellen saw the signs, knew J.R. was manipulating Don, but her husband was oblivious. He had no idea that the sarcastic "boy" at the end of J.R.'s sentence was one of the lowest insults a Texan could bestow on another man. It was also the sign J.R was moving in for the kill.

"Don, it's time to end this," she discreetly said to her husband even as he impatiently waved her off.

"You would be surprised at what I know about you, Ewing," Don returned, regaining some of his composure as he motioned to Sue Ellen with his thumb. "Sue Ellen's diaries are explicit. You gave her so much material, she could write an encyclopedia on the Neanderthal tendencies of Texas men."

"Don!" Sue Ellen angrily shouted mortified by what he had just revealed.

Don swore, instantly aware he had been easily baited into revealing too much information.

J.R became eerily quiet as he looked over at Sue Ellen. The anger in his eyes made it difficult for her to breath.

"Your diaries," he muttered. "Finally it makes sense. You not only let this idiot read your diaries, you let him make a movie out of them." There was only silence between them for several long seconds. "Well, I hope your revenge is complete now, Sue Ellen. I don't have much more you can take from me."

"You have no idea how much you hurt me, J.R.," she quietly said, unwelcome tears stinging her eyes.

"Oh, I think I do. But it's obvious you and Lockwood make quite a pair, honey. You deserve him more than I ever imagined."

Sue Ellen said nothing in reply. The acidic disapproval in J.R.'s voice made her blood run cold, mostly because he was right.

"Sue Ellen, it's time for us to leave," Don said, taking her by the arm, still embarrassed that the infuriating Texan had manipulated information from him.

J.R. turned to John Ross, who had gone quiet. He put his fingers lightly under his son's chin and tipped his head up so he could see his face. The boy looked both bewildered and angry.

"Sorry our day didn't turn out like we planned, bud," J.R. said, trying to smile.

"What film, Daddy?" John Ross asked. "What are they talking about?"

"It's nothin' for you to worry about, son. Just somethin' I should have put an end to a long time ago … which I will now."

Sue Ellen knew the veiled threat was directed at her and she glared over at Don. She was going to make him cancel the film distribution deal, just as she had promised J.R. last night. She no longer wanted any part of the movie being shown publicly. Thoughts of the entire project now made her feel dirty, especially after hearing Don so carelessly throw out the fact that he had read her diaries to achieve it. She also wondered if he would use the information against J.R. - and possibly her - anytime he wanted.

"John Ross," J.R. gently continued. "I need you to go home with your mamma now."

"No, Dad ... please don't make me go!" John Ross begged, trying hard not to cry. "Let me stay here with you. I don't want to live with them anymore. I don't want you to go away again."

J.R. stroked John Ross' hair then bent down and kissed him on the forehead. "I'm not goin' far, son, I promise. I'm gonna be here whenever you need me. All you have to do is call. Besides," J.R. said with a forced smile, "remember what we talked about in the car last night. A deal is a deal … we shook on it."

"Yes, sir," John Ross bravely said.

"Now you take care, son. And look out for your mamma."

"Yes, sir," he formally answered once again.

"And I'll be seein' you real soon."

John Ross stood motionless for a moment then wrapped his arms around J.R. "Please don't forget me again, Dad."

"Not a chance, son," J.R. quietly said, trying to clear his throat from the emotion that constricted it. "I have never forgotten you. Never will."

J.R. bent down and placed another kiss on his son's forehead then released him and turned for the door. He opened it and looked back at Sue Ellen, who quickly brushed the tears from her eyes.

"I'll ... uhh …send someone to collect John Ross' things," she said.

J.R. gave her a slight nod.

The Lockwoods walked out without another word. Sue Ellen's gaze was steady on John Ross, her arm wrapped around his shoulder. But an odd sense of loss shot through her as she passed by J.R. She felt there was something she needed to do, something she needed to say. But her breath was caught in her throat, the choking feeling nearly suffocating her.

After he briefly watched them walk down the hall, out of his life once more, J.R. closed the door then leaned heavily against it. His breathing became shallow, suppressed rage and disappointment engulfing him. His fists were tightly clenched, every muscle in his body coiled, as he slammed them against the door with all his might.

"Damn it!"

He had lost again.


	26. Part 26

LONDON RAIN, Part 26

_And if these wounds  
They are self-inflicted  
I don't really know  
How my poor heart could have protected me  
But if I have to carry this pain  
If you will not share the blame  
I deserve to see your face again_

The solitary silence of the hotel suite was unbearable. All around the dark, empty room, J.R. could see his son … his wife. Their presence was still so strong.

His eyes closed tight, trying unsuccessfully to blot out the images. After so much time away from them, he had come so close to having them as his family again. How had it all gone to hell so fast?

The few inches of bourbon left in bottle he was holding beckoned. He wanted to be numb, was waiting for it to happen. Anything to make the feelings of sorrow and guilt and years of regrets go away. He looked away from the bottle to his other hand and contemplated the crystal glass, suddenly fascinated by the pattern, disappointed it was empty.

He poured more bourbon into it, his unsteady hand spilling some on his clothes. It went unnoticed as he bolted the shot. Funny how it didn't burn as it went down anymore.

He silently prayed he would pass out. Then there would be no more memories of John Ross and Sue Ellen. His smile … her voice … his laughter … her touch. The touch he craved. Just the thought of it made his entire body tense. Nothing short of unconsciousness would erase the need for her.

He poured another drink and considered the past few hours as he swallowed. There had been several phone calls to Ratagan and his contacts in London. They were all scrambling to figure out what went wrong. They knew Lockwood had indeed found the money and paid off the loan but where he had gotten the money from was still a mystery.

It had to somehow involve Sue Ellen and that made J.R. uneasy. Was Lockwood stealing from her? Embezzling from the company? How else could he raise that kind of cash? Ratagan had found out years ago, back in Dallas, that Lockwood was broke and had no family. Hell, his wife had died, probably just to get away from him. So where did the money come from?

Having no answers infuriated J.R. and he cursed out loud. He was tired of thinking of Lockwood. He wanted the little loser out of his mind. But one unrelenting thought that involved him wouldn't go away. How could Sue Ellen have chosen to believe Lockwood over him?

J.R. rationalized that he had been honest with Sue Ellen since they met in Harrods. He had explained he wanted nothing more than just to be with her and their son. He thought they had reached an understanding. He felt as if they had regained some of the closeness they had lost so long ago. Yet she chose Lockwood.

Another shot of bourbon was sloshed into the glass and angrily bolted down. Lockwood was going to pay for coming between him and his family. So would Sue Ellen. He wanted her to feel as much pain as he felt right now. Yes, that was cruel, but he no longer cared. Then he stopped. That was a lie.

His eyes closed and he slowly shook his head. As much as he wanted to hate her, he couldn't. He loved her. He was in love with her. They shared too many memories, too much history he couldn't deny. The past few days had only reinforced that. Plus there was John Ross. The link that kept them connected when all else was gone.

It was almost eerie how history repeated itself. He had experienced the same kind of emotions that last night at Southfork. He had even contemplated ending it all right then and there. He could still feel the gun against his head, feel his finger on the trigger. But all he could see that night was John Ross. Just like now.

No. Killing himself wasn't the answer then and it sure as hell wasn't now. Instead, he would strike back. The plan was already in motion to regain his son.

J.R. tried to recall the conversation he had had earlier with Harve Smithfield, the Ewing lawyer back in Dallas. He had ordered Harve to get him a London solicitor and work on getting custody of John Ross. J.R. wanted the boy as far away from the Lockwoods and London as possible. Cost didn't matter. Neither did Harve's warning that the chances of winning were slim since he had signed custody over to Sue Ellen before she left for London. But he would win, J.R. vowed to himself. He had to. Then Sue Ellen could experience the desolation of John Ross being gone.

The delicious sense of revenge quickly faded at one fatal realization. Even if Sue Ellen lost John Ross, she would still have Lockwood. She would still be married to him. Share his life. Share his bed.

That cut like a dagger being driven deep into his chest.

J.R. unknowingly gripped the glass so tightly it broke under the pressure, the razor-like shards slicing his palm.

"Damn!" He cried out as he dropped the remaining pieces.

His senses dulled from the alcohol, he looked down, watched the blood pool in his hand and was surprised he couldn't feel it. He remotely knew he should wrap it up but he didn't care. Then his fist closed tightly over the wound and he looked away.

How could she do it? How could Sue Ellen be in love with a man who was so far beneath her? Everything about Lockwood was so boring it bordered on tacky. He was certainly no match for the former Miss Texas. So what the hell did she ever see in the sawed-off, stupid son-of-a-bitch?

There was a dull pounding in J.R's hand that felt like an echo in his head and heart. How could a woman he had gotten rid of still hurt him so bad? Or was it she who had gotten rid of him?

It didn't matter. She was about to find out how wrong she was. He would have his revenge. But now came the thing he hated worst when a deal was about to go down … the waiting. The tomblike quiet of the hotel room only amplified it.

He had tried to leave, get as far away from London as possible. He had tried to get on the next plane back to Paris and get the hell out of there. But the fog had shut down the airports.

He looked over at the dark window. The fog. It was suffocating the city. Suffocating him. He had no choice but to wait. Wait until morning. Then he would be gone, come hell or high water. Thank God. How he hated London, hated everything about it. It was too full of memories now. Too full of things he wanted to forget.

He drank straight out of the bottle. All he had left was the bourbon.

Then finally it happened. Coherent thought deserted him as his body relaxed out of his control. With an unsteady smile, J.R. closed his eyes, grateful the alcohol had finally seeped in and taken control of his system. The endlessly repeating thoughts and memories grew distant, muted as he slipped into the semi-conscious world of oblivion. He sighed in relief as the blurred darkness took over and the numbness dulled the pain.

The empty bottle dropped to the floor and rolled away.


	27. Part 27

LONDON RAIN, Part 27

The dark shadows of the night before receded as rays of sunlight filled the hotel suite, reminding J.R. of one of his mamma's favorite sayings ... _"everything always looks better in the morning."_ She was right. She always was. And just the thought of Miss Ellie made him smile, further improving his mood.

A long, hot shower had also helped. Sitting on the edge of the bed, attempting to pull on a boot, J.R. reluctantly admitted to himself that he really was feeling better even though his head was pounding from a wicked hangover. Damn bourbon.

During the pursuit to become numb the night before, he had skipped the usual branch, the water used not only to refine the taste of the whiskey but also dilute the elements that caused hangovers. And there was nothing like a bourbon hangover to remind you just how stupid it was to get drunk on it in the first place.

He remembered his first hangover from the whiskey and the advice Jock had given him afterwards …_"Junior, a bourbon hangover will make even a hard drinkin' man cry like a little girl the next mornin', so stay the hell away from it."_

J.R. laughed out loud, even though the sound gripped his skull like a vice.

"You weren't kiddin', Daddy," he quietly muttered as he leaned over and rested an elbow on his knee then closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose.

The effects of the bourbon were actually one of the reasons he had developed a taste for it. The whiskey had a tough-guy reputation that impressed most Texans and if you could get a business partner or enemy to drink with you, it usually gave you an advantage. A night of drinking bourbon usually left a person thinking they had learned nothing while forgetting everything, which always provided an ideal time to close a deal. J.R. wasn't sure how many millions he'd made by doing just that. Too bad he had forgotten those same rules last night.

He looked down at his bandaged hand. There was a vague recollection of cutting it but he didn't know how or when it had been bandaged. He reflexively curled his fingers into a fist and winced as it pulled on the wound. Another fuzzy memory of the two people he was trying to forget last night flashed through his mind … Sue Ellen and John Ross. J.R. flexed his hand again and wasn't sure which hurt worse, the physical cut on his hand or the mental cut at their absence. No wonder the straight bourbon had seemed so appealing.

He shook his head and took a deep breath, pushing the depressing thoughts away. Last night was over and done with. Now it was time to do something about it. He had phone calls to make before getting the hell out of London and back to Paris.

Taking another deep breath, steeling himself for what was about to happen, J.R. stood up. His head throbbed in protest, making him a little unsteady on his feet, but the feeling passed as he inhaled deeply once more. That wasn't as bad as he thought.

As he entered the main room, a knock on the door rang out. He opened it and Marian the night butler entered, smiling brightly as she carried in a pot of coffee and cups on a tray.

"Good morning, Mr. Ewing."

"Mornin', Marian," J.R. replied. "Is that coffee you've got with you?"

"Yes, sir … American coffee."

"You must've read my mind," J.R. said with a grin as he approached the table where she was pouring him a cup.

"Happy to be of service, sir." She hesitated then continued. "I'm actually off duty but wanted to stop in and check on you. Please forgive the intrusion."

"Not at all, Marian. I appreciate you thinkin' about me."

"Well, it is nice to see you up and about, sir," she replied. J.R. gave her a quizzical look and she began to explain. "I thought you had gone out for the evening when I arrived last night to perform my nightly duties. Then I found you unconscious on the couch. Your hand was bleeding and I must say, sir, you gave me quite a fright."

"My apologies for that," J.R. said, a look of both concern and embarrassment in his expression. "I had a little too much to drink last night."

"That's quite all right," she said with a smile. "We all do at one time or another."

J.R. held up his bandaged hand. "You the one who took care of this for me?"

"Not exactly, sir. I contacted the hotel medical staff when I found you. I thought we would need to transport you to hospital but they took care of you quite nicely."

"They sure did," J.R. said with another grin as he looked down at his hand. "I was wonderin' who fixed me up."

"They also gave you a shot of B vitamins …" She paused then delicately continued. "To help you feel a little better this morning."

"Ah!" J.R. exclaimed with a short laugh as he rubbed his arm. "No wonder it felt like I'd been stung by a mad hornet. But it surely has helped the hangover."

"Yes, sir," Marian said with a smile.

"Any idea how I did this?" J.R. wondered out loud as he looked down at the bandaged hand again.

"Well, sir ... there was a broken glass on the floor next to you when I arrived. Crystal can be rather nasty when broken."

"Just wish I knew how I broke it," he softly said. The thought of being so drunk and out of control disturbed J.R. but he pushed the thought away and looked once again at the butler. "Thanks for cleanin' up after me. I'm not usually like that. But there is just somethin' about this city that makes me wanna get drunk. The fog … the rain … I don't know."

"Well, you're not the only one," she gently replied with a knowing smile. "There is a reason London is well known for its pubs. It can be a rather lonely city … especially this time of year when far from family and friends."

J.R. looked over at the woman. He sensed she somehow knew it was his family he was missing and it made him feel better.

"Thank you, Marian."

The butler simply gave him a nod and smiled. There was something both irresistibly charming and forlorn about the American that made Marian want to befriend him. Perhaps it was the way he treated her, as if she were part of his family instead of with the cool indifference she was used to. Whatever it was, it was a refreshing change.

"You might want to have your hand attended to by your personal physician when you get home," she added. "Especially when it's time for the stitches to be removed."

"Yes, ma'am," J.R. grinned as he rubbed his hand. "Never get drunk on bourbon, Marian. It's nothin' but trouble."

"I'll remember that, sir," she said and returned his smile.

"Now," J.R. said and took a sip of coffee, "what do you think my chances are of gettin' on a plane for Paris today?"

"You're leaving us early?" Marian asked, trying to hide her disappointment.

"Yes," J.R. tightly replied, his smile fading. "It's time for me to get outta London for good."

"I'll check on flight availability, sir, although being so close to Christmas, the seating may be limited."

"Now no need to trouble yourself if you're off duty," J.R. protested. "I mostly just wanted your advice. I can ask that fella who comes in here later to do it."

"No trouble at all, Mr. Ewing. I'll be happy to assist you."

J.R. looked at her and smiled again. "You're makin' yourself indispensable, Marian. Kinda like Sly, my personal assistant I was so fond of back in Dallas."

"Thank you, sir. That must be high praise indeed." She sat the coffee pot down and turned to him. "Is there anything else you require this morning?"

"No, that will be all for right now. I think I'm gonna head out and get some fresh air … maybe try and clear my head."

"An excellent idea, sir. I'll inform you of the available flights on your return."

Marian turned and started walking toward the door. J.R. followed behind then opened it for her.

"Do the best you can for me, Marian, and I'll make it worth your while."

Marian looked up at her temporary employer and smiled once more. "Yes sir, Mr. Ewing. Enjoy your walk."

Once outside the hotel, J.R. placed his cowboy hat on his head and winced. It felt two sizes too small.

"Good morning, Mr. Ewing," the doorman called out. "Do you require use of the car?"

"No, thank you," J.R. said quietly, pulling the brim of the hat down over his eyes. "Just gonna take a walk through the park."

"Very good, sir."

J.R. crossed the street and entered the park through the gates of The Grand Entrance. It was the same place he had met Sue Ellen the other night. She had felt so good against him when he wrapped his arm around her. Then he sighed, banishing any other thoughts of her away, quickly refocusing on why he was in the park. He wanted to find the spot where John Ross had built the snowman yesterday, where they had had their snowball fight.

After walking several minutes, J.R. found the familiar area and crouched down to examine the ground. The snow had melted, leaving nothing behind. He hadn't really expected anything to be there but had hoped that some trace remained. Just like with Sue Ellen. He had hoped she had some feelings left for him, not just bitterness and hate. Perhaps she did. It had felt like it the past few days. But why had she chosen to side with Lockwood?

Lockwood. Just the thought of him made J.R. want to punch something, especially because his son was living in the same house with the reckless idiot. J.R. longed for a way to prove the man was a liar, to show Sue Ellen how wrong she had been. But it would have to wait. The most important thing now was John Ross.

J.R. paused for a moment and looked around. In the rational light of day, free from the effects of the bourbon, he didn't honestly want to take John Ross away from Sue Ellen. She truly was a good mother and John Ross adored her. But she had made her choice by siding with Lockwood and that left J.R. with very few options. His eyes became focused again, full of anger. Sue Ellen could stay with Lockwood but it was for damn sure she was going to do it alone. The boy belonged with him now and he was going to do everything possible to make sure it happened.

J.R. stood up, ready now to put the past few days behind him. It was time to move on.

The walk back to the hotel didn't take long but as he neared The Grand Entrance once more, a long, black limousine pulled up and two large men in black overcoats got out. They looked big enough to be Dallas Cowboys and as they came closer, their eyes focused on him. J.R. stopped and let them draw near, waiting to see if he was indeed their target or simply in their way. He didn't have to wait long for the answer.

"Mr. Ewing," the one on the left said as they stopped a few feet in front of J.R.

"Who the hell wants to know?" J.R. snapped back.

"Mr. St. James wishes to discuss the Lockwood Entertainment proposal with you," the other well-dressed linebacker replied. "Please come with us, sir."

J.R. quickly realized that Ratagan's men must have made contact with the organization holding Lockwood's marker. Except why did that matter now? Last night, Lockwood had acted like he found some way to pay off the debt. Or had he?

Even though the two huge men in front of him were intimidating and he knew their offer to join them was not optional, J.R. couldn't help but laugh. Lockwood must have somehow screwed up the deal and J.R. wanted to find out just how badly. Then his smile warped into a rather devious smirk. It might also be the opportunity to strike back at him.

"Well then, c'mon, boys," J.R. replied as he walked in between them and took each of their arms "Let's not keep Mr. St. James waitin'."

Caught off guard by his cheek, the two big men simply followed J.R.'s lead.


	28. Part 28

LONDON RAIN, Part 28

Within minutes, J.R. realized the limousine had entered the City of London, the Square Mile that was the heart of London's business and financial service industries. Lloyd's of London and the London Stock Exchange were among the famous residents and just like the American and Japanese counterparts located in New York City and Toyko, trillions in currencies, stocks, bonds, and commodities were traded there each day. He'd even done some business there himself on several occasions.

"We have arrived, Mr. Ewing," announced one of his bulky escorts as the car slowly pulled to a stop in the shadows of one of the tall, imposing office buildings. "Please follow me."

As the two large men stepped out of the car, J.R. did as instructed. Once he was standing on the sidewalk, he took in his surroundings and was both relieved and amused. He had been expecting to be dropped off at some dingy warehouse on a wharf, not in the center of London's financial district, just down the street from the hallowed halls of St. Paul's Cathedral. That made him smile. The London extension of organized crime certainly had nerve.

The trio entered the building and crossed through an impressive lobby that led to four matching elevators. They didn't wait long before an empty car arrived and the trip to the chosen floor was thankfully quick. After following a maze of hallways, they arrived at an office suite that rivaled that in the old Ewing Oil building. Across the glass doors in bold gold lettering, "St. James Enterprises" announced the occupant. It all seemed so civilized.

One of the linebackers opened the door and motioned J.R. through as the other went to the reception desk. He leaned down to whisper something to the receptionist and within moments, J.R. was ushered into the main office.

Once inside, J.R. surveyed the impressive room. The lighting was warm and inviting, illuminating richly textured walls filled with shelves of leather-bound books and decorated with paintings of horses in rural settings. It felt more like a den than an office and gave no clue at being the nerve center of an organized crime syndicate.

The same man who had announced their arrival went over to the dark leather chair partially hidden behind a massive desk occupying the center of the room.

"Mr. Ewing, sir," he carefully said then backed away and returned to J.R.'s side.

The chair slowly turned, revealing an older man with a slight build and glasses.

"Ah, Mr. Ewing," he said as he stood up from behind the desk. "How nice of you to join me."

The sarcasm wasn't lost on J.R. but he bit back a reply. Both the man's voice and demeanor were dry and precise with very little expression illuminating either. He looked more like a librarian than a Mafia don and it was probably what made him so successful. It would be difficult to suspect the shy, quiet little man of anything criminal based on his appearance alone. He sure as hell wasn't Marlon Brando.

J.R. would have laughed at the mental comparison except for the uneasiness he felt. Summing up all the nerve Jock has instilled in him long ago, he boldly stepped toward the desk and grinned, offering his hand to the older man.

"I appreciate the opportunity, Mr. St. James."

St. James was momentarily startled by the audacity of the American. The entire situation had been set up to intimidate him yet he was confident, almost jovial. Somewhat wary, St. James took the offered hand and returned the handshake.

J.R. was impressed by the surprisingly strong grip but the man's touch also caused a shiver of dread to run down his spine. All pretenses aside, instinct told him to be careful. Instantly controlling himself, focusing on the task at hand, J.R. looked St. James in the eye and grinned once more.

"So, what can I do for you, sir?"

St. James looked at J.R. for a moment more then returned the grin. This American had possibilities.

"Sit down, please, Mr. Ewing," St. James said as he motioned to a side chair and resumed his seat. Watching as J.R. settled into the chair, the man began tapping his finger on a file folder. "The business proposal you sent to me was quite intriguing albeit unexpected. Tell me more about your interest in Lockwood Entertainment."

"Well, sir … I decided to strike while the iron was hot, so to speak." The fake sincerity J.R. had practiced for years sounded genuine. "Besides, there is no love loss between Lockwood and myself. To be perfectly honest, Mr. St. James, I can't stand the man." J.R. paused and grinned. "Takin' over his company is a mighty temptin' prospect."

"Well, that is refreshingly honest, Mr. Ewing," St. James said, amused by the arrogant answer. "But what of Mrs. Lockwood? Your ex-wife wouldn't appreciate you acquiring Lockwood Entertainment, would she?"

J.R.'s smile faded at the mention of Sue Ellen. St. James had obviously done his homework. He had also just subtly increased the stakes, almost making it a threat.

"I certainly hope not," J.R. replied tightly, sounding more annoyed than apprehensive.

"Oh come now, Mr. Ewing," St. James said with a brief chuckle as he tapped the folder in front of him once again. "You wouldn't pay such a large amount of money simply for revenge, leaving you stuck with a company so far removed from your area of expertise." He leaned forward and peered at J.R. "So, allow me to rephrase the question. What possible use would an oilman have for a movie company?"

The veiled threats were coming faster and faster but J.R. faked a smile of admiration. "To use an American term, sir, I plan on raidin' it. I'll break Lockwood Entertainment into little pieces then sell 'em off to the highest bidder."

"Destroy it outright?"

"Yes. Properties tend to move faster that way and generate quicker profits. Plus it tends to make the former owners squirm."

"Hmmmm, interesting," St. James mused. He sat back in his chair and observed J.R. for several moments then continued. "You should know that Mrs. Lockwood has made quite a substantial counteroffer to pay off the debt and assume ownership."

"Has she now?" A shimmer of amusement mixed with pride gleamed in J.R.'s eyes.

"Yes indeed," the older man nodded smugly in reply. "She made the offer in person."

J.R. swallowed hard realizing he had just stepped from a negotiation into a trap. How had Sue Ellen gained access to St. James? That thought made a chill ran down his spine once again.

St. James slowly stood up from behind his desk and motioned to two large doors at the side of the room. The brawny guards opened them simultaneously then St. James motioned to J.R.

"Come this way, Mr. Ewing."

J.R. stood up and could see the doors opened into an impressive boardroom. As he followed behind St. James, he caught a glimpse of four lone figures sitting at the end of a massive oak table: Don Lockwood, Sue Ellen, John Ross, and a man he didn't recognize, each with a very large guard hovering behind them.

It was a trap, just as he had suspected.


	29. Part 29

LONDON RAIN, Part 29

The silence of the room was unsettling. J.R. had no way of knowing the four at the table had been told not to talk. Their expressions were unreadable as they watched him and St. James approach the table.

Sue Ellen was relieved to see J.R., hoping his arrival was a good sign. She had offered St. James the money to pay off Don's debt but it had done no good. Was it because J.R.'s offer had already been accepted? If so, then maybe the past two hours of frightening confusion might finally come to an end.

John Ross looked from his father back to Sue Ellen, searching for answers. She attempted a smile even though she was worried about him. He had been so quiet and withdrawn since they left J.R. yesterday. Now these ridiculous men had involved the boy in their games. It certainly wasn't the way she had planned their day together.

They had left the house earlier that morning to go Christmas shopping but were met by the three large men now standing behind them who had forced them into a waiting limousine. To her surprise, Don was already inside. His acquiescence and pleas for them to do as they were told were suspicious. When the car stopped and picked up Jake Jackson, there was no longer any doubt. Don had borrowed the money from Jake, just as J.R. had told her. Now they were all being held responsible because he had failed to pay it back.

Even as angry as she was with Don, Sue Ellen mentally berated herself. Why hadn't she listened to J.R.? She knew he had told her the truth about the situation yet she had sided with Don. Why? Had she done it out of duty? Out of love? Or simply to spite J.R.? She looked over at her ex-husband. Whatever the reason, he was probably the only one who could get them out of the situation now. But would he do it after she had turned her back on him?

J.R. had to fight back the surge of panic rising in his chest at seeing Sue Ellen and John Ross at the table. As he drew closer, he surveyed their pale and frightened faces, looking for any signs of abuse, seeking assurance they were unharmed. John Ross tried to smile then looked away.

When J.R.'s gaze shifted to Sue Ellen, their eyes locked and for a few brief seconds they silently communicated on a level both thought lost long ago. Those amazing, expressive eyes. J.R. knew instantly she was scared but both she and John Ross were unharmed. His anger with her vanished. All that mattered now was getting them out of there, away from St. James and his army.

J.R. then glared over at Lockwood. Don tried to return a defiant stare but the combination of anger and cold hatred in his opponent's eyes made him look away. It was obvious J.R. held him responsible for the situation but that was the least of his worries. Don knew he had been brought before St. James to be punished. J.R. was probably part of that plan. But what truly terrified him was that his punishment might include Sue Ellen and John Ross. His only hope, although it was a painfully reluctant one to admit, was that J.R. might somehow be able to get them out of this.

Lockwood's deflated appearance clearly broadcast his shame and guilt, further lowering J.R.'s opinion of him. No doubt he was going to just roll over and play dead, giving St. James anything he wanted, including Sue Ellen and John Ross.

That thought was frightening. Too frightening to even consider and J.R. forced himself to concentrate on the reason he was there. He looked over at St. James and realized the older man had been closely observing him, waiting for a reaction. Well, he was going to be sorely disappointed. There would be no reaction. J.R. had learned long ago that there was no place for emotions while negotiating and no amount of intimidation by cut-rate thugs would change that. The initial shock was over. It was time to find out exactly what the kidnapping son-of-a-bitch wanted.

"Well … you've made quite a show of force here, Mr. St. James," J.R. remarked, the steel edge in his voice conveying his displeasure. "Perhaps it's time you to tell me what you're really after?"

Once again, St. James was impressed by the American's nerve and straightforward approach. "Please sit down, Mister Ewing," St. James replied as he moved to the head of the table.

J.R. did as instructed, remaining focused on the task and the man before him. But out of the corner of his eye, he saw Sue Ellen reach over and take their son's hand. The gesture filled him with a powerful sense of determination. He had done battle with opponents a whole lot worse than St. James and he'd be damned before this little man would intimidate him or further harm his family.

Clearing his throat, St. James focused all the attention on him, bringing the unusual board meeting to order.

"Before you and I can discuss your proposal any further," St. James said as he looked over at J.R., "I need a moment to deal with some personnel issues." The sudden brittleness of the man's voice conveyed all pleasantries were over. "You see, I run a clean operation with little room for error. Precision is the key to my success. When an error occurs, it must be swiftly dealt with." He looked over at the man sitting next to Don. "Mr. Jackson, what have you to say in your defense?"

Upon hearing the other man's name, J.R. realized he must be Jake Jackson, Lockwood's bookmaker friend whom Sue Ellen had mentioned the other night. J.R. actually felt sorry for him. If this was the way Lockwood treated his friends, he would be better off knowing an undertaker.

Jackson fidgeted nervously in his seat then spoke. "There is no defense or excuse for me funding the loan without your permission, Mr. St. James, sir. I thought the money would be returned with no delays. However, the collateral did seem to make the risk worthwhile and was promising a tidy profit on default."

A silence fell over the room lasting several long, agonizing seconds.

"Hmmm, yes," St. James finally replied. "That it did, Mr. Jackson. And your honesty is very much appreciated." St. James studied the man for several moments more before announcing his verdict. "You will be sent to the Manchester office where you will start over as a clerk and relearn how my money is handled. If you do well, I will give you the opportunity to earn back your former position, say in about ten years."

"Thank you, Mr. St. James, sir," the man replied, obviously greatly relieved even though the demotion was severe.

"However," St. James sternly interjected, making the man start with fear once more. "You shall not have any more contact with Mr. Lockwood in any way or at any time in the future. If you do, you will be dealt with immediately with no further explanation. Is that understood?"

"Yes, sir, Mr. St. James," the man gladly groveled.

"Then you may leave." St. James dismissed him as if ending a royal audience. "I expect you in Manchester by tomorrow morning."

"Yes, sir," the man said as he quickly stood up and left the room accompanied by a guard.

"You see, Mr. Ewing," St. James said as he turned back to J.R. "Mr. Lockwood obviously doesn't appreciate the value of a good friend or the principles my business is founded on. If he did, he wouldn't have put both my money and one of my most valued employees at risk … along with other things he holds so dear."

Another veiled threat, this time aimed at Sue Ellen and John Ross. As much as it secretly bothered J.R., Lockwood looked even more uncomfortable and J.R. finally realized the part he was playing in St. James' game. He was there to witness Lockwood's punishment and further humiliate him. It was probably the same reason Sue Ellen and John Ross were there, too. If only Lockwood would follow his friend Jackson's example and take his punishment like a man, this whole mess might end with no further repercussions.

"Mr. Lockwood," St. James said as he looked over at Don. "What have you to say in your defense?"

"I'm very sorry for the trouble I've caused you, Mr. St. James," Lockwood replied with a weak smile. "I never intended to default on the loan, sir. It just took longer than expected to raise the money. And I swear to you, I didn't know the check I gave Jake yesterday to bring the loan up to date was worthless."

"Ah, yes … the check." St. James held up the piece of paper. "You accept a check for seventy-fifty thousand dollars from one of the dodgiest businesses in New York City and you expect it to be good."

"I'm not sure what happened, sir, but I will get the money," Don quickly countered. "The film I'm working on is almost complete. When it is, I will return your money, I promise. Even more. Whatever you ask for."

J.R. could no longer contain his anger. "Lockwood, if you're talkin' about that piece of trash film you made about me, I guarantee you'll be dead long before you make a profit on it."

"There, there, Mr. Ewing," St. James said as he held up his hand to stop the tirade. "Mr. Lockwood is indeed working on a film in New York City but it has nothing to do with you." The older man looked over at Don who quickly looked away. "The only problem is, he is working with people who are unscrupulously immoral and dishonest."

Don quickly looked up at St. James. "Sir?"

"There will be no money, Mr. Lockwood," St. James replied, clearly irritated. "There is no more company. They have packed everything up, including your film, and moved back to Hong Kong."

"I … didn't know." Don was clearly surprised by the announcement.

"You should have," St. James quickly countered. "No good ever comes from working with people in the skin trade."

"The skin trade?" J.R. wondered out loud.

"X-rated films," came the furious response from Sue Ellen.

J.R. looked over at her and could see how angry she was. All of this was a revelation to her, too.

"Yes," St. James acknowledged Sue Ellen while keeping his stern gaze on Don. "Mr. Lockwood has been in New York making some rather unpleasant films."

"They promised me the five hundred thousand dollars to pay off the loan," Lockwood added.

"And now you have nothing," St. James sternly replied.

"Well I'll be damned," J.R. said with a humorless grin as he looked over at Don. "You mean to tell me Mr. Big Shot Hollywood Director has lowered himself to directing porn?"

The savage glare Sue Ellen gave Don was the sole reason he didn't respond to J.R. He wiped the perspiration from his forehead and didn't look up for fear he would lose his temper.

J.R. couldn't contain a sudden burst of laughter. As much as he had wished for Lockwood's downfall, there was no way he could have guessed he would fall so far.

"Sounds like the Academy won't be callin' out your name for that Oscar this year, Lockwood."

"It just so happens I have a personal message for you from someone I've been working with," Don finally snapped as he looked over and glared at J.R. "Mandy Winger sends her love."

J.R.'s smiled faded as he coolly observed Lockwood. "Well, she does that quite often … with any available man." Then he realized what Lockwood meant. "Is she in the picture you've been filmin'?"

"Yes … she's the star of show," Don continued. "And quite a fascinating lady. Not only is she both very talented and beautiful, she also had a great deal to say about you. As a matter of fact, she has given me enough material to write a sequel to the movie about you."

"Not if I have anything to say about it," Sue Ellen interjected with another withering glare at her husband.

She silently seethed, not only at Don's revelation about Mandy and the film, but because she was in the one position she detested most ... that of being helpless. She was caught between four men who could either end this situation or make it worse. Don with his idiotic film that was sinking them … J.R. who seemed to be waiting for the opportunity to either free them or fry Don … John Ross who was silently witnessing it all … and Mr. St. James whom she knew nothing about except for frightening bits of whispered gossiped she had heard while living in London.

Don looked over at his wife, instantly apologetic. This wasn't the way he had planned to tell her. "Sue Ellen, luv … I …"

"Enough!" St. James impatiently growled as he glared at Don. "Do keep quiet from now on, Mr. Lockwood. You are in no position to threaten anyone, especially not Mr. Ewing." St. James looked over at Sue Ellen. "Mrs. Lockwood, thank you for your earlier offer to pay off Mr. Lockwood's debt but I'm afraid you've been outbid." St. James then looked over at J.R. "Mr. Ewing, Lockwood Entertainment is yours."

Don flushed with anger but remained silent as J.R. gave him a smug, victorious grin.

"Thank you, sir," J.R. politely replied, looking back at the older man and giving a nod of respect. "I'll arrange for the one point five million to be transferred to you whichever way you choose."

"Ah, but we agreed on an even million," the older man replied.

"Yes, sir." Then J.R. gave Mister St. James one of his most brilliant smiles. "Let's just call it a bonus … for your time and trouble."

The older man returned the smile. "I graciously accept."

"Wonderful," J.R. said, still grinning. "Now I must ask for a favor in return, sir. Would you please allow Mrs. Lockwood and the boy to leave?"

"Unfortunately … no." St. James' smile faded and J.R. felt the same chill run down his spine when he first met the man. "There is still the matter of Mr. Lockwood's punishment." All eyes at the table turned to St. James after the ominous words and he continued. "You see it's not simply a matter of the money being paid back. Mr. Lockwood has abused both my company and my funds and that can not go unpunished." St. James looked back at J.R. "Mr. Ewing, are you familiar with the saying, '… the sins of the father?'"

"... 'shall be visited upon the son,'" J.R. automatically replied, the color draining from his face. It was the all-too-familiar threat B.D. Calhoun had used when he abducted John Ross and nearly killed him.

"Yes, indeed," the older man replied. "It is one of the established codes of my organization."

"Mr. Saint James," J.R. quickly interjected, "the boy who is livin' with Lockwood is not his son. He is my son."

"Yes, I know," St. James sadly said. "Mr. Lockwood gambled with your assets as well as mine. But unfortunately, the rules can not be changed."

"The hell they can't," J.R. angrily said as he leaned forward and slapped his hand on the massive table in front of the older man. "I'm growin' damn tired of this game you're playin'."

One of St. James' guards withdrew a pistol and pointed it at J.R.'s head.

"Choose your next words carefully, Mr. Ewing," St. James said ominously. "They may be your last."


	30. Part 30

LONDON RAIN, Part 30

With an insolent, contemptuous stare, J.R. coolly surveyed St. James.

"Don't you ever threaten my son again," he cautioned, his voice low and menacing. "You need my money more than you do these cheap theatrics. Now you either call off your goon and let my son and his mother go or you won't be gettin' a dime from me."

St. James studied J.R., his displeasure twisting into an angry scowl. Retaliation was indeed impossible. The American somehow had a deeper grasp of the situation than previously known.

"You seem to know more about this than I anticipated, Mr. Ewing."

"You underestimated me, Mr. St. James," J.R. coolly replied.

St. James and J.R. stared at each other for several more moments before the older man finally waved his hand and the guard withdrew the gun that was pointing at J.R.

"Bravo," St. James quietly said. "That took a great deal of courage."

"No," J.R. countered humorlessly. "Just know-how."

It had been a gamble but the risk just paid off. J.R. knew from the beginning St. James had been bluffing. Ratagan had given him information that showed St. James' "company" was sinking financially. Plus St. James himself had unknowingly telegraphed that. He had been a little too threatening, a little too pretentious and J.R. had intentionally gone along with it to gather as much information as possible. But bringing John Ross into it had ended the charade once and for all.

"I know your company is hurtin'," J.R. continued, "and you're gettin' leaned on because of it. It's why Lockwood defaultin' on his loan caused such a problem." There was no reply, which gave J.R. the answer he needed. "But tryin' to get more money outta me by threatenin' my son was a big mistake." He suddenly leaned back and relaxed again. "I am not without reason, though. You release my wife and son … let me deal with Lockwood … and I'll increase my offer to five million dollars."

St. James considered the offer then slowly nodded. "Very well. The boy and Mrs. Lockwood are free to go, you have my word. And I can think of nothing better than washing my hands of Mr. Lockwood. I only hope his punishment will be appropriate and memorable."

"Oh yes," J.R. nodded. "I know just what to do with him." He then looked over at Sue Ellen. "He will be turned over to his wife. She is the one he should answer to. Besides, I've never known a more vengeful woman in my life."

Sue Ellen inhaled sharply at the insult but tolerated it. J.R. had just pulled them all out of danger. Besides, he was partially correct ... Don would be receiving very little mercy from her.

St. James observed Sue Ellen's reaction and was satisfied J.R. had spoken the truth. He knew all too well an angry wife was worse than the most severe beating.

"Then it is done," he said, closing off any further discussion. "Your escorts will show you out and return you to where you were picked up. And I hope never to see any of you again." He looked over at Don. "Especially you, Mr. Lockwood. If you ever enter any of my establishments or have any contact with any of my employees again, this unorthodox decision that has been forced on me will be immediately revoked and you will be dealt with in the proper manner."

"Yes sir, Mr. St. James." Don weakly replied. "Thank you, sir."

"Don't thank me," the older man said as he stood up from his chair. "You owe a debt of gratitude to Mr. Ewing. I suggest you remember that … especially now that he owns your company." St. James turned, leaving Don to silently fume, and offered J.R. his hand. They shook on their deal. "Mr. Ewing, you are quite formidable."

"That's a compliment, comin' from you, sir," J.R. replied with an insincere grin.

"Indeed." St. James returned the smile. "Are you this cunning when dealing in the oil business?"

"That's where I do my best work."

"Hmmmm." St. James observed the American with a smile. "Not all my assets are ... organizational. If I were to perhaps diversify a percentage into oil, would you be available as a consultant?"

"You know where to find me."

St. James released a short laugh. Yes, this American definitely had possibilities. With that, he turned and went back into his office accompanied by several guards. As the doors closed behind him, the remaining guards approached their wards.

"Mr. Ewing," said one of the large men standing behind J.R., "if you will follow me, sir, we will take you back to your hotel."

"Just a moment," J.R. replied then looked over at his son, who sat silently in his chair, his eyes wide with fear and confusion, waiting for permission to move. "John Ross ... come here."

John Ross looked over at his father, glad that someone had finally recognized he was still there after being talked about but ignored for so long. He left his chair and ran around the table to him. J.R. bent down to meet him with a warm embrace and pulled him close.

"It's okay, son," J.R. softly said, reassuring himself along with the boy. "Everything's gonna be okay."

"Don't leave, Dad," John Ross whispered. "Don't leave us here alone."

"I have to." J.R. unhappily replied and pulled back to look at him. "It's time for me to move on … get back to Paris. But I promise, you're gonna be safe from now on."

"But Mom and I need you."

The sincere request touched J.R. The boy was obviously still frightened by what had just happened. But as much as it bothered him, J.R. knew there was nothing he could do about it now.

"I know you do. I know that better than ever now." Then J.R. pulled back to smile down at John Ross. "But I won't be far away. That's why I moved to Paris. Anytime you need me, you just call and I'll be here."

"You promise?" The boy asked, trying to understand while holding back his tears.

It was such simple request but meant everything to J.R. John Ross wanted him around and that now validated the time he thought he had wasted in London.

"I promise, son," J.R. said as he pulled John Ross close once again and patted him on the back. "Plus don't forget I'll be seein' you real soon. New Years Eve will be here before you know it."

"Think Mom will still let me come over to Paris to spend it with you?"

"You can count on it." J.R. gave John Ross another hug then released him. "Okay, now ... you take care, John Ross." Then he gave the boy the only thing Jock had withheld from him. His love. "I love you, son."

"I love you, too, Dad." John Ross suddenly looked up at his father and smiled. "And don't forget about our deal."

J.R. was caught off guard by the statement. "After all that's happened, you still think we have a chance of makin' that work?"

"Yes, sir." John Ross proudly grinned.

"Hmmm." J.R. couldn't confirm or deny he still wanted to win Sue Ellen back. The past few days had given them a whole new set of problems to overcome. But he was pleased by his son's tenacity and that some happiness had returned to his expression. "We'll talk about that in Paris."

"Okay, it's a deal."

"You certainly are your granddaddy's boy," J.R. laughed as he straightened up. "Now go on back to your mamma, you little schemer."

John Ross laughed and turned back towards Sue Ellen, then called out a final farewell over his shoulder. "See ya, Dad!"

"Bye, son!"

As J.R. watched the boy walk away, his gaze gravitated to Sue Ellen. Their eyes locked briefly before both looked away and J.R. abruptly turned for the door followed by his guards.

John Ross was now standing at his mother's side as they both watched J.R. walk away. He looked up at Sue Ellen, the pleading in his eyes nearly breaking her heart. She squeezed his shoulder and tried to smile then suddenly felt compelled to go after J.R. The time they had spent together the last few days couldn't end like this.

"Sue Ellen, luv," Don said, grabbing her arm, knowing where she was headed. "It's time to go home."

Sue Ellen glared over at Don and he removed his hand. "I'll only be a moment."

Before Don could reply, Sue Ellen started out in J.R.'s direction.

"J.R.?" She called out. "J.R., please wait?" J.R. stopped but didn't turn towards her then she quickly caught up. "Thank you … for what you did just now."

"All that matters is you and the boy are safe," he replied flatly.

"I am so sorry about what happened … the way it happened."

J.R. turned on her with such ferocity she cringed back as if he were going to strike her.

"Save it, Sue Ellen. " he angrily replied. "You did exactly what you were supposed to do. You sided with your husband." Then his temper finally exploded. "But look where it got you. Look where it got our son!"

"I know." She quietly replied.

"No, I don't think you do. I don't think you have any idea of what St. James was threatenin'. He might'a been bluffin' … today … but do you really wanna see threats of God-only-knows-what hurled at John Ross like that just because of your husband's stupidity? I'm not gonna stand for it, Sue Ellen."

"What do you mean?" She weakly asked, already knowing the answer.

"If you wanna waste your life with Lockwood, fine. But you're gonna do it alone. Harve Smithfield has found me a solicitor here in London. I'm suin' you for custody of John Ross."

"J.R., please don't put John Ross through another custody battle," she replied, her emotions starting to get the better of her. "I'm not sure he can take it." She reached out and touched his arm, trying to reinforce how much she needed him to hear her. "I'll let you have him whenever you want. We can work something out between the two of us."

"The hell we can," he snarled. "After what happened here today, I won't have my son livin' under the same roof with Lockwood under any circumstances." His eyes narrowed dangerously, the menacing steel gray enforcing his threat. "After I get through with you, I'll have all your money for that libelous waste of film you made about me and Lockwood Entertainment will be demolished. Neither one of you will have anything left." She didn't respond. There was nothing more she could say. "Get yourself ready, honey, 'cause I'm comin' after you with everything I got."

With that, J.R. turned and he was gone.

Sue Ellen stared after him until her vision blurred as tears welled up in her eyes. The past few hours had been terrifying but the ordeal with St. James hadn't frightened her nearly as much as J.R. just did.


	31. Part 31

LONDON RAIN, Part 31

The Lockwoods were returned to their house and abruptly dropped off on the sidewalk in front. As they stood together, waiting for the long, black limousine to pull away, signaling their ordeal was truly over, all three remained silent, a mixture of anger and disappointment swirling around them.

Not wanting any more contact with his stepfather and longing for the solitude of his room, John Ross quickly went up the stairs and opened the door. When he disappeared into the house, Don looked over at Sue Ellen.

"I'll make it up to him, Sue Ellen … and to you. I promise."

She allowed the words to sink in before slowly turning to him. When she spoke, her tone was as cold as the look in her eyes. "He needs time, Don. Please give him as much space as possible for the next few days."

Don nodded. "Does that go for you, too?"

Sue Ellen looked at him for a moment longer then silently walked off to the stairs.

"I'm going to the office … to take care of a few things." He ineffectively called after her, needing an excuse not to have to face either one of them at the moment. "I'll be home later."

The only answer he received was the door closing.

Sue Ellen walked down the hallway to John Ross' room and paused at the open door. He was packing a bag. Unshed tears burned her eyes as she watched him. Who could blame him for wanting to leave?

"You, um … need some help with that?" She softly said.

"No thanks," he quietly replied, not looking up.

She entered the room and sat down on the bed next to his bag. "Where you headed to?"

"Ben's. I called and asked if I could hang out with him tonight. His mom said I could."

"I see."

Finally he looked over at her. "I'm sorry, Mom, but I don't want to be around Don tonight." He looked down and started packing again. "I tried to call Dad, to see if I could stay with him, but he didn't answer."

Sue Ellen thought back on the threats J.R. had issued about taking John Ross away. As much as the idea hurt, perhaps it would be best to let John Ross go to him.

"You thinking you might like to live with your dad again?"

John Ross quickly turned to her. "Oh no, Mom! I won't leave you. I just thought it might be better if I stayed with Dad right now, just 'til I stop being so mad about Don."

"I can understand that," she said and tried to smile.

John Ross looked at her for a moment then gave her a hug. She wrapped him tightly against her and started to cry.

"I am so sorry, John Ross."

"It's okay, Mamma. It's not your fault." He drew back and she reluctantly released him.

"Do you have time to sit down here and talk to me?" She asked as she wiped the tears from her eyes.

"Sure," he said, trying to smile.

As he sat down, she put her arm around his shoulder and he snuggled against her, silently seeking reassurance just as he had done since he was a baby.

"You're gonna be safe, sweetheart," she whispered, finding it difficult to talk. "Those men won't ever show up again. I'll make sure of it. And I know your daddy will, too."

"I miss Dad already," he quietly sniffed.

"I know." She nodded and fought to hold back more tears.

"This morning, I thought for sure you and Dad were gonna get back together. What happened?"

"John Ross, it's not that simple. I'm still married to Don."

He quickly looked up at her. "But you don't love him. You never have!"

Sue Ellen was astonished by the remark. "What on earth makes you say that?"

"I don't know," he replied and looked back down, suddenly embarrassed by his outburst. "You just act different around Dad."

"Oh, sweetheart." She paused, trying to find a way to explain the situation to him. "A lot of things did go right for your daddy and me the past few days. But you've got to understand, we were pretty tough on each other back in Dallas and there are still so many things we need to fix. Some things, I'm not sure we ever will. And that makes it difficult for us to live together." She looked down at him. "That probably doesn't make any sense, does it?"

"Yeah, it does … kinda," he nodded. "I'm just glad you're finally telling me instead of treating me like a little kid."

Sue Ellen smiled. "Well, I've been trying to remember you're a teenager now instead of my baby."

"Yeah." He sat quietly for a moment then looked up at her with eyes so much like his father's. "Mom … do you love Dad?"

Sue Ellen thought carefully about his question before answering. "In some ways … yes, I do. But he makes it so difficult to love him sometimes."

"Yeah, he does," John Ross said, thinking back on the past few years. He rested his head on her shoulder once again. "But I still want us to be a family again."

"I know you do. I know how much you've missed him. But the way things are now, with the things your daddy has done for us the past few days, it's closer to being a family than we have been for a long time. And even though we won't live together, I have a feeling we'll be seeing him a whole lot more from now on."

"But he is so mad because Don messed everything up," John Ross angrily said. "I don't think Dad will ever come here again."

She sadly nodded. "I did some things that weren't very fair to your daddy, either."

"Are you still mad at him?"

"No, sweetheart. Not anymore." She looked down at him and stroked his hair. "Your father made some pretty big sacrifices to keep all of us safe today, especially you. That meant a lot to me."

He nodded and smiled. "I was so scared but not Dad. Did you see how cool he was when that guy pulled a gun on him? He made them all look like dorks."

"Yes, he did," Sue Ellen softly said with a smile. "He doesn't like to be pushed around and the thought of you being in trouble made him even angrier."

"And you, Mom." John Ross grinned. "Didn't you notice he told that man to let 'his son and wife' go?"

A zing ran through the nerves of her stomach and Sue Ellen self-consciously touched her cheek, knowing she was blushing. "You really are becoming very grown up."

"That's what I keep trying to tell you." He said with a light laugh but his smile soon faded. "Mom, please don't stay here alone with Don tonight. If you do, then I'll stay, too."

She briefly tightened her grip on him, touched by his concern. "Thanks for that but I'll be fine. There's a special holiday concert at the Royal Opera tonight … maybe I'll go to that and spend the night at the Savoy like I usually do. Would you like to come with me?"

His face twisted into a mixture of dread and hesitation, just as she knew it would. "Would you mind if I don't? Ben has a new video game we want to try out."

Sue Ellen laughed. "No, I don't mind at all. Can I at least drive you over there?"

"Yeah, I'd like that."

They both stood up and Sue Ellen helped John Ross finish packing. As they went to the door, he stopped and looked up at her.

"Mom, will you do me a favor?"

"Sure. What is it?"

"Check on Dad for me … just to make sure he's okay."

Sue Ellen thought about his request then nodded. "I'll see what I can do."


	32. Part 32

LONDON RAIN, Part 32

Soft lights illuminated the Lockwood den, fending off the early dark of the winter evening. Sitting behind the desk, Sue Ellen was deep in thought, concentrating on several documents before her. It all seemed very business-like except for her appearance.

Earlier, she had dressed for the opera, complete with an elegant evening gown and matching wrap that was draped over the back of the chair. Her soft dark hair was brushed back, revealing exquisite jewelry that added to the grandeur of her appearance.

She glanced down from the papers to her diamond watch and a frustrated sigh escaped her. It was nearly time to go yet she still had so much to accomplish. It would have to wait. She wanted to be gone by the time Don came home.

Pushing the chair back, she stood up and gathered the papers, pulling them together and stacking them neatly into one pile. Then she stopped and looked over at the phone. She knew she had to try again before she left. The promise she made to John Ross to check on his father was irrevocable. However, phoning J.R. was still as daunting as it had been the other times she tried.

After a deep breath to calm her nerves, she picked up the phone and dialed the number she had already memorized. If J.R. answered, she had no idea what she was going to say to him. She even doubted he would allow her to say anything at all. But she had to try, if for no other reason than to let John Ross know he was all right. She wanted to know for herself as well.

The phone rang three, four times, the anticipation doing nothing for her nerves. Just as she was ready to hang up, a voice from the other side of the room startled her.

"Hello, luv."

Sue Ellen looked over at her husband and quickly composed herself, assuming the well-practiced, cool air she often relied on.

"Sorry," Don added. "Don't let me interrupt your call."

"There was no answer," she replied flatly as she casually hung up the phone.

"I see." Don found her continued disinterest both unnerving and infuriating but tried to gain some composure before continuing. "It's very quiet in the house tonight. Where's John Ross?"

"Staying with a friend."

At least he's not with his bastard father, he thought. "So … that leaves just you and me then?"

"No. I'm going to the opera tonight."

Her leaving the house eliminated any attempt at reconciliation and did nothing to quell Don's rising temper. "Sue Ellen, do you think we might have a more engaging conversation? We have a lot to talk about, luv."

"You're right," she replied, unimpressed by his sarcasm as she surveyed him with a cool glare. "We need to talk about how much we lost today. How much more we might have lost. However, I'm not sure I can remain civil about it at the moment. Besides, I don't have the time."

"Then you make time!" Don shouted, finally losing his temper. "Did you know that bastard has already locked me out of the studio along with all my scripts and development plans? That's nearly 10 years worth of work! My God, what more do you want? Isn't that enough punishment?"

Disgusted by his selfish outburst, Sue Ellen considered him for a moment. So many unflattering facets of his character had come to light the past few days, things she didn't know existed in him. Her husband. It was a shocking realization to find herself married to a man she suddenly knew so little about.

"My, how nice you're thinking only of yourself," she replied. "I was talking about John Ross, about him being kidnapped today and the threat that was made against him. Does it even remotely matter to you that he was nearly forced to pay for your debt?"

Don looked away, shamed by her words. "Yes, of course, it matters."

"Well, it scares me to death. God only knows what might have happened if J.R. hadn't been there."

"Oh yes, how fortunate we all were to be saved by the mighty J.R. Ewing," Don sarcastically replied. His temper had spiked once again at the mention of J.R. but Sue Ellen remained unimpressed by his outburst and he knew it. Don forced himself to calm down, desperate to make a better impression on her. "Please, luv. Don't let him come between us. Everything was fine until he showed up."

"Was it?" She asked, the touch of sarcasm sharpening her tone. "J.R. had nothing to do with your last three over-budget projects. J.R. wasn't there when you borrowed money from a loan shark. And J.R. didn't force you into compromising yourself by working on films so far beneath your talent." A cutting half-smile curved her lip but she was far from amused. "How ironic that on top of all that, you had the nerve to threaten him with a film that wasn't even yours." He had no response and it disappointed her even further. "Damn it, Don … don't you have any principles left?"

He let out a short, bitter laugh. "No, I can't afford them."

Sue Ellen turned, unfazed by his attempt at humor, and gathered her wrap from the back of the chair. Realizing she was about to leave, Don rushed over to her, taking her by the arm, forcing her to look at him again.

"Sue Ellen, please don't go. Stay with me tonight. We can work this out."

"We are both too angry to work anything out tonight."

"Then explain something to me," he snapped. "How can anything I've done be as terrible as what J.R. has done?"

Sue Ellen pulled her arm free. "Because I didn't expect it from you!"

Don tossed his hands up in frustration. "I can't tell you how tired I am of being compared to that man!

"You are the one who is trying to compete with him."

"Compete with him? Is that what you think I'm doing?"

"Yes … and it's a losing battle." Her remark made Don swear under his breath but Sue Ellen remained indifferent. "I'm warning you, Don … leave him alone. He is vicious when provoked and if you continue to do so, he will bury us both … if he hasn't already."

"I can't believe you are defending him! What happened to your resolve to get away from him?" Don asked, hoping to deflect her attention away from him. "Where is the anger you poured out about him in your diaries? He mistreated you at every turn!"

"Sometimes I wonder if you fell in love with those diary entries instead of me," she wearily replied.

He finally relaxed and tried to smile. "I did, in a way. The lady who wrote those pages was so full of strength … determination … such deep emotion."

Sue Ellen slowly shook her head. "No, the lady who wrote those pages was an angry, neglected trophy wife lashing out at her cheating husband the only way she knew how."

"And you succeeded, luv. The film that came from your diaries was your crowning achievement."

"Was it? I wish I'd never made the damn thing now."

Don was horrified. "Don't say that, Sue Ellen."

"It's true. I resent the cold, calculating, brittle person I became to make that film. But no more. No more revenge, no more competition. It's time to make peace with my past, Don … and that includes J.R."

"Does he have to saturate our lives again for you to accomplish that?"

"That's not the way it will be. Besides, he's different when he's with John Ross."

A pang of jealously ripped through Don. "Time apart certainly has readjusted your opinion of him, hasn't it?"

"No, it has readjusted my opinion of me." She looked at him for a moment, the pleading look in her eyes nearly breaking his heart. "And you. After what happened today, I'm wondering if I even know who you are any more … if I ever knew."

"Of course you know me … nothing's changed." Don replied, finally contrite. "I'm sorry for what happened today, for the way you found out … I truly am. But don't you understand? I was so desperate to prove myself to you, I just made some bad decisions. That's all."

"Why can't you understand that you don't have to prove yourself to me? You never have. It doesn't matter if your movies make millions or win you awards. All that matters is you enjoy your work. If I'd known you were in trouble, I would have gladly given you the money. Why didn't you come to me?"

"I just wanted a little financial success of my own, to prove to you I could do it," he quietly replied after a moment. "It all got out of hand."

"Why, Don? Where are all these feelings of inadequacy suddenly coming from? Is it why you're never home any more … why you haven't touched me in months?"

Don looked down, away from her, unable to answer. However, a reason occurred to Sue Ellen that made her cringe.

"Have you been sleeping with Mandy Winger?" She asked.

Don was caught off-guard by the question. "Of course not! How could you even ask that?"

"Tempted?" She quickly added, undaunted. His following hesitation told her all she needed to know. "Never mind," she said, her voice now hushed in disappointment. "I just hope you know she is using you to get back at me and probably J.R."

"Do you really have that little faith me?"

"I just know the way she works. The manipulative little viper will stop at nothing to get what she wants."

"On the contrary," Don said defensively. "Mandy has been nothing but sweet and supportive the past few weeks."

"I see." His words brought out an agonizing twinge of déjà vu and Sue Ellen felt as if she were going to be sick. She folded her arms across her chest, hoping to hold back the feeling and emotions that were beginning to overtake her. "If you continue to see her, you and I are through."

"I haven't been seeing her," Don replied, clenching his jaw as he bit back his anger. He hated being accountable to anyone but most of all he hated having his life dictated to him.

"No, you probably haven't been unfaithful to me in the traditional sense of the word." Sue Ellen continued. "But directing her in an X-rated film, telling her what moves to make …"

"It's not like that!" Don interrupted.

"Oh, knowing her like I do, I think it is exactly like that."

"Well, then … perhaps I should just give up my career, be here to cater to your every whim." He resentfully suggested. "I mean, since my apology and promises obviously aren't good enough, what else do you want?"

"What else do I want?" Sue Ellen echoed with a heavy sigh.

She turned from him and walked to the window, disappointed by his sulky, self-absorbed responses. As she stared out into the night, she could mentally visualize only two choices. She could forgive him, tell him everything would be all right and maybe make love to him. Only his apathy about the entire situation crushed any hint of the attraction she felt towards him. So that left only one alternative. She would have to wipe the slate clean and hope for a fresh start once the dust settled between them.

"I want only two things," she quietly said. "And neither one is negotiable."

Don realized too late his caustic question had pushed Sue Ellen to this point. And he sensed there would be very little leniency for him.

"All right, then," he hesitantly agreed. "Name them."

"First, you will sign an affidavit that relinquishes ownership and any further claim to anything associated with my film, including the intellectual property rights."

"Very well," He replied, relieved the request could be so easily accomplished. Being ride of the damn thing would actually be a relief.

"Along with that, you will also return to New York and kill the distribution deal as soon as possible then have the remaining prints delivered to me by courier."

"I, uh … didn't actually have a print with me in New York," he said awkwardly. "I was only testing the waters, seeing if there was any interest."

She turned to him, appalled by his stupidity. "So there is no firm distribution deal?"

"We are only at the talking stage."

"That was a very dangerous bluff, Don."

"I know … and a bit childish. Ewing just brings out the worst in me." She offered no acknowledgement and Don searched for a distraction from the embarrassment he now felt. "So what is your other condition?"

"One you won't like but I'm hoping you will find a way to deal with," she said matter-of-factly. "J.R. will be an inevitable part of our lives from now on. John Ross needs his father and I can no longer justify keeping them apart."

"I see," he replied unenthusiastically. "So I should be expecting regular visits from him then?"

"For the sake of John Ross, I hope so."

"No, Sue Ellen," he angrily replied. "Not in our home. I won't agree to that. Send John Ross back to Texas to visit him there."

"That is no longer possible." She paused and took a breath, dreading the next announcement. "J.R. lives in Paris now."

Don paled at the news, his jaw clenching with tension. "How convenient."

"He has reconnected with John Ross, Don. That's all that matters to me."

"No doubt he will be reconnecting with you next."

Sue Ellen clenched her fist to keep from slapping him. She had fervently wished it wouldn't come down to this but he left her no choice.

"Unfortunately, that comment gives me no other choice but to issue a third request. I think it would be best if you and I spent some time apart right now."

"You don't mean a divorce?" He was astonished by the demand.

"No, I mean a separation until we can sort things out in a more civilized manner. We are getting nowhere like this and I refuse to let John Ross be caught in the middle of our fight."

Don always knew John Ross came first. Sue Ellen would do anything to protect the precious Ewing Prince. Even though he was just a child, it didn't make being second to him sting any less.

"How nice," he sarcastically remarked. "And only a few days before Christmas."

"I'm sorry but Christmas is exactly why a separation right now would be best. I don't want anything to spoil it for John Ross. He has had enough to deal with this past year and I don't want anything to go wrong on the one day he is looking forward to."

"Will J.R. be here to share it with you?"

Once again, Sue Ellen resisted the urge to slap him. "No."

Don took several moments and considered all his options. He was disturbed by the controlled anger in her eyes, her cold and calculating demeanor. What was worse is he realized he had behaved horribly the past few days, pushing her to this point. Was any of it worth losing her? Was J.R.? His anger faded. No. Besides, in a way she was right. There was a great deal he needed to make right with her and some time away might be the chance he needed. The thought of losing her permanently was unacceptable.

With a heavy sigh he reluctantly agreed. "All right then. I'll spend Christmas with my mother in Blackburn."

"I'm sure she'll love that," she said, accepting his surrender but remaining guarded.

There was nothing more to say. What a timid ending to all that had happened between them the past few days. An end neither of them had ever expected.

"Sue Ellen," Don softly called out. "I plan to do everything in my power to win you back."

She tried to smile, tears shining in her eyes. "I hope so."

"So how about if I start now?" He finally smiled, resigned to the fact that even though nothing would change tonight, this was not the end. He would have plenty of time in the New Year to make it up to her. He would get his projects back on track then be there for her once J.R. crawled back under whatever rock he had emerged from, leaving her disenchanted once again. But for now, he would do anything he could to make her happy. "If I catch the 10:15 flight tonight, I'll be in New York by the morning so I can terminate everything going on over there. Including Mandy."

"Thank you, Don." Sue Ellen genuinely replied. From the stack of papers she had been reading, she withdrew a document her lawyer had delivered earlier in the evening. She laid it on the desk and picked up a pen. "Here is the affidavit releasing any further claim to the film."

Don looked blankly at the pen then back at her. "My, you are prepared, aren't you?"

Sue Ellen bristled at the cutting comment and slammed the pen down on the desk making Don realize he had just blown another chance with her. He quickly moved around the desk and reached for the pen.

"No, I'm sorry, Sue Ellen," he pleaded. "I didn't mean that … the way that sounded." She remained tense, unimpressed by his apology. He took the document from her then stretched it out across the desk and signed all the required lines that had been tabbed with yellow arrows.

Sue Ellen watched him, her eyes guarded as if expecting another attack. When he finished and looked up at her, she felt nothing. The anger over everything that had transpired the past few days still burned too hot for her to feel anything for him now.

"Well, then," he said, knowing it was time to leave. "I'd best be off to Heathrow.

"Yes," she whispered, emotions constricting her throat. "We'll talk when you get home."

"I'd like that," Don softly said.

She made no other sound and it unsettled him. Her presence was stark, her expression set in granite except for the emotions that burned in her eyes. His short stature had never bothered him before … he always thought the charm he had been blessed with more than made up for his height. But as Sue Ellen stood before him wearing heels that made her a good three inches taller than he was, he had never felt more diminutive in his life.

He stood on his toes to kiss her cheek but she remained indifferent. As he withdrew, he looked at her for a moment then turned and went to the door. There was one more thing he had to say, though. He couldn't leave her without saying it.

"Sue Ellen … I do love you, you know."

She nodded, the anger leaving her expression. "Have a safe trip."

At last there was a small crack in her stony façade. It wasn't much but it was more than Don had hoped for. He made a silent vow to repair all the damage he had done. It would be worth anything he had to win her back. And he knew he could.

Everything would be different when he came home day after tomorrow.


	33. Part 33

LONDON RAIN, Part 33

Several knocks echoed through the darkness of J.R.'s hotel suite. Sitting in one of the leather chairs in front of the fireplace, he stared at the door over the top of his empty shot glass. He wasn't going to answer it. He was in no mood for company even though he knew who it was.

Sue Ellen had already called several times and left a message with the butler. All went unanswered. He knew what she wanted. She was going to apologize. To hell with her, he angrily thought. She married Lockwood, she deserved him and the consequences that followed. That made him pause. Perhaps it was time to tell her just that.

Outside, Sue Ellen waited. After a moment, she knocked on the door again just as it suddenly swung open. She recoiled back a step, startled by the sudden motion and the fury in the icy blue eyes staring down at her.

Lighted from the hall, J.R. was struck by how beautiful she looked. Exquisite diamond earrings framed her face while an identical necklace drew his eyes downward. A long blue wrap touched with silver covered a matching dress that elegantly accentuated every delicious curve of her body right down to those perfect legs wrapped in stockings and the polished blue high heels. His eyes returned to her face, his gaze met by her dark eyes. God, how he wanted her. The intensity of his need made him even angrier.

"What the hell are you doin' here?" His voice was low and sharp, matching the fury in his expression.

"What the hell do you think I'm doing here?" Sue Ellen snapped back.

It was worse than she thought. He was in a terrible mood, the kind she wasn't sure she could fight against. Instinct told her to run, get as far away from him as possible, but she held her ground. No more running. She had vowed long ago never to be intimidated by him again.

He leaned against the door and leered at her. "From the way you're dressed, looks like you're thinkin' about tryin' to get me to drop the custody suit or else get Lockwood's company back for him. Maybe both." There was no humor in the grin he gave her. "It won't work, honey."

She answered him with a defiant stare. "I'm here because your son is worried sick about you. You wouldn't answer his calls … or mine … so he made me promise I would check on you." She shook her head in disgust. "I don't know why I bothered."

She glared at him for a moment longer then turned and walked away.

"Damn it," he whispered and slammed the door jam with his fist. Her mentioning John Ross was not the response he had expected, the one in defense of her husband he had prepared every possible reply for. His expression fell from anger to anguish and manifested everything he felt in one long tragic glance as each step took her farther away. He couldn't let her go. Not like this. Not after being without her for so long. "Sue Ellen … wait."

She reluctantly stopped then looked back at him. His whole demeanor had changed. The egotistical sneer was replaced with genuine repentance.

"Tell John Ross … I'm fine," he quietly said. "And I'll call him from Paris tomorrow."

"Are you leaving?"

"I should've never stayed this long." Too long, he thought. Long enough to want his family back. Long enough to want her.

"I'm glad you did," Sue Ellen softly answered.

J.R. nodded and looked away. Unsure he had the energy to deal with whatever else she might say, he turned and walked back into the dark room and headed for the bourbon decanter.

The retreat and unintentional invitation to enter surprised Sue Ellen. It was a window of opportunity J.R. uncharacteristically left open. Yet as she turned and approached the door, a warning sounded in her head … she was about to enter a dark room with an angry man she knew was capable of anything.

She stopped at the threshold, unsure if she should continue. Not only were J.R.'s emotions volatile, the brutal events throughout the day had left her emotionally unbalanced as well. It hadn't been an hour since Don left. Her heart and mind belonged with him. Yet she could no longer deny her feelings for her ex-husband. It was difficult to name what she felt for J.R. … not friendship, not love, but no longer hate. She couldn't let his visit to London end so badly, especially because it had meant so much to John Ross. If only for the sake of their son, she had to try and salvage the situation. She stepped into the suite and closed the door behind her.

As the door latched, J.R. turned, wishing she had gone, hoping she had stayed. When he saw her figure faintly outlined by the firelight, he bolted a shot of bourbon.

"Where is John Ross?" He growled. "Don't tell me you left him alone with that son-of-a-bitch you're married to?"

"He's staying with one of his friends." Her tone was gentle in contrast to the derogatory remark and it visibly diffused him as she hoped it would.

J.R. fell silent, brooding, and Sue Ellen took the opportunity to study him. Even in the dimly lit room, she was struck by how different he seemed, so different than the confident, sharp man who had commandeered St. James' meeting earlier in the day. His wrinkled dress shirt was open at the collar, his tie discarded, the sleeves rolled up. The slight silver shadow of his beard emphasized his uncharacteristically beaten-down, exhausted appearance.

"J.R., are you all right?"

"Oh, just wonderful, darlin'," he sarcastically replied. "I had no motive for comin' to this town 'cept to see you and John Ross. Look what it got me … punched, stitches in my hand, accused of causin' Lockwood's problems, kidnapped, my son held hostage, a gun pulled on me, then havin' to pay five million dollars for a worthless company I don't even want. To top it all off, Lockwood not only threatened me with that film of yours, the little bastard also proudly announced how you let him read your diaries about me." He poured another shot of bourbon and drank it. "God, I hate this city."

All Sue Ellen could do was nod. She couldn't deny he had some genuine reasons for being angry and hurt. And having contributed to it caused a pang of guilt that was difficult for her to bear.

She walked over to him and reached out to take his bandaged hand. "What happened?"

J.R. yanked his hand back from her. "Nothin'. I dropped a glass."

She nodded sadly, knowing it was probably much more than that. "I'm sorry, J.R."

"Is it ever gonna end, Sue Ellen? This need you have to exact revenge on me? 'Cause damn, honey … I don't know how much more I can take."

For a man so arrogantly self-assured, J.R. had the ability to be heart-wrenchingly vulnerable at times. Few people knew of the strong emotions that ran through him. He was an expert at cloaking what he felt, just as his father had beaten it in him to do. Jock had never allowed his namesake to acknowledge emotions and as a result, J.R. developed a charming, ruthless façade that concealed yet secretly warred with the tempestuous needs and wants that had ruled his life since he was a boy. Whenever he wanted something, he wanted it too much, making acquisition and control the only way he knew how to obtain it. Only now there was nothing left in his life to control and everything bottled up inside of him was threatening to spill out. Sue Ellen had sensed it the moment she had seen him in Harrods. Now there was no doubt about it.

A powerful, long-forgotten instinct beckoned to her. She felt the need to reach out and comfort him. Reason chimed in and told her it was impossible. The gap between them was too great. Even if it was crossed, she didn't trust her ability to control her response. She had never been able to resist him at times like this. Times when she would share his pain, know his heart and mind as well as she knew his body, all the while needing the same reassurance from him in return. There was no place she felt as safe as she did in his arms. As unfaithful as the thought seemed, she craved that feeling now.

J.R. poured another shot of bourbon, clearly intent on getting drunk whether she was there or not. He had been drinking a great deal while in London and she chastised herself for not seeing it sooner. He had always been a social drinker but this alcohol wasn't for enjoyment. She knew its only purpose was to reach oblivion. Seeing him succumb to it in a pattern that was too familiar nearly broke her heart.

"This heavy drinking," she said cautiously, regarding him as she would a coiled rattlesnake. "It's not like you."

"You don't know a damn thing about me anymore."

"J.R., don't do this. Think of your son. Would you want him to know you're sitting here alone in the dark, getting drunk?"

"Go to hell, Sue Ellen."

"I've already been there, only I preferred vodka."

"Don't lecture me!" He snapped back. The sharp need for her was the reason he had spent most of his nights in London drinking alone, just like now. Her simply standing there was pushing him to the very limit of his control.

"Okay … fine." She paused, trying to control her temper. "I won't feel sorry for you, either." When she received no reply, she softened her approach. "J.R., please … it's been a hell of a day. Can we call a truce?" He ignored her plea and it both frustrated and infuriated her. "We can't go on like this!"

J.R. slammed his glass down on the table, the loud crack making Sue Ellen jump. He turned and stared directly at her, the coldness in his eyes nearly unnerving her.

"The last thing I want is talk." His voice was like cold steel, matching his eyes, and it sent a terrifying chill down her spine. "I am drunk, very pissed off ... and want you so bad I can't breathe."

He didn't dare move. If she were any closer, he would lose all control and prove it. Instinct enticed him, made him long to feel her mouth against his. It was driven by the faint scent of the perfume she had worn since he first met her. The scent that made her unique in one of so many ways.

As it had always been, there was something dark and forbidden about J.R. that drew Sue Ellen in when she least expected it. It heightened the thrill of being in his presence now. The desolate loneliness that surrounded him made the sensation overpowering. Yet she was frozen, unsure what to do about it.

J.R. misinterpreted her silence as a denial and it crushed him, made him even angrier. "Now get outta here, Sue Ellen. Go back to that bastard husband of yours."

She knew better than to challenge him but rational thought had escaped her. "And if I don't?"

J.R. turned then went deadly still as he surveyed her. She instantly regretted what she had said. Worse yet, she feared what it was about to cost her.

"You either leave," he quietly replied, the tone of his voice a tense mixture of thinly restrained denial and desire, "or you'll be spendin' the rest of the night in my bed."

That final, sensual warning was reinforced by a silver blaze in his eyes that glittered from the faint light of the fire, revealing the deep desire that consumed him. His mood had crossed the undistinguishable line from anger to passion and Sue Ellen knew it. Never before had she felt so intensely wanted … or needed a man so much.

Their eyes locked, measuring the depth of emotion they could sense in each other. It couldn't be happening, J.R. thought. He wouldn't allow himself to believe it. He wanted her so badly, more than anything else. He could feel the need in her, too. But he couldn't face another loss, another denial. He had been beaten too many times lately. If she rejected him … it was unthinkable.

J.R. finally looked away from her, down at his glass. He moved his hand towards it, finally deciding he wanted only the comfort alcohol offered. It would make him forget all the mistakes that had left him with nothing. Soften the hard reality that she was married to another man. Obliterate the desire for her that threatened to burn him alive.

Sue Ellen reached out and stopped his hand from picking up the glass but instantly knew she had miscalculated. J.R. focused his gaze back on her, the intensity in his eyes making the breath catch in her throat. She tried to retreat but with lightening speed he grabbed her, pulling her against him. Her touch was the only thing that mattered now.

Caught off balance, Sue Ellen stumbled into his arms and he wrapped them around her, pinning her against his chest. Having her trapped against him nearly destroyed all reason. J.R. had no intention of being violent with her but the hunger for her was savage after years of repression. She was so feminine and fit against him so perfectly that he could think of nothing beyond the fact that his whole body was charged with a sexual tension that screamed for release. The release only she could give him.

"J.R. …" Sue Ellen whispered, robbed of her voice.

The husky sound of his name was both a question and demand that nearly destroyed what little control J.R. had left.

"You were warned," he exhaled and bent his head to capture her mouth with his.

Sue Ellen inhaled raggedly as the intensity of the kiss engulfed her senses, setting her on fire, shattering all thoughts and reason. There was a vague sense that this was the point of no return, that she would soon have no way to deny him, even if she tried. Yet it had been so long since she felt consumed by a single kiss. By his kiss. Resistance was impossible. She only wanted more.

Feeling her surrender, J.R. relaxed his hold, his hands gentling as they slid down to mold her against him. With her arms free, Sue Ellen slid them up around his neck, pulling him closer, deeper, blending her mouth and body to his.

He rewarded her with a kiss that made it nearly impossible to stand. The way she leaned into his strength, melted against him, it was how he dreamed of her … hot and ready and craving his touch. Yes, it was Sue Ellen he fantasized about. No other woman captivated him the way she did. She was his lover, his mate, the only woman he had ever loved. J.R. deepened the kiss. It was time to claim her as his once again.

The sudden possessiveness of his kiss heightened her vulnerability, leaving her physically powerless. Yet Sue Ellen thrilled at the sensation, was even emboldened by it. No man had ever made her abandon reason so easily and so willingly as J.R. did. And she never had to fake her reaction to him. She couldn't. His touch made her burn even as his kisses demanded nothing less than her full, complete response, commanding her to follow him, which she did without hesitation.

Somehow they were in the bedroom. She didn't know how. All that mattered was she was on the bed, under him, and he felt as powerful and masterful as he always had been, perhaps even more so. She trembled at the thought of what he was doing to her … what he was going to do to her.

Time after time J.R. took her mouth, foreshadowing the way he was going to take her body, the slow, deep rhythm keeping Sue Ellen on the edge as her body responded to his demands. She feverishly whispered his name against his lips, into his mouth, and J.R. savored the realization that she was his once again. Yet he gladly gave into all she offered in return. With all inhibitions gone, her touch shattered him, showed him she remembered what he liked, what he needed. And he had never needed anything like he needed her at that moment.

Neither knew how clothing was removed, whose skin was stroked, who moved or followed. Consumed by sexual intoxication, everything blurred into the only thing that mattered … that they were together after so many desolate years and futile attempts to deny the unfaltering attraction between them. It was what no one else had ever understood about them. What no one ever would. That no matter what had happened between them, when they made love, all that mattered was they were deeply connected by a pleasure and gratification neither had found with anyone else.

Or ever would.


	34. Part 34

LONDON RAIN, Part 34

Sue Ellen looked down on J.R. as her fingers traced across the naked skin of his chest and broad shoulders. She marveled at how she still loved to touch him, how much she had missed touching him. Yes, she had missed him. More than she would have ever allowed herself to realize until a few days ago. Even more so now she had finally let go and made love to him.

Her breath caught at the memories of the past few hours. She was in awe of what had happened between them. Their sex life while married had always been good, especially the year before they broke up for the last time, but tonight had been different. Never before had she felt such a need for closeness in J.R. He had willingly shared his sexual pleasure and encouraged her response instead of wanting to control it. He allowed her to give back all he demanded, touch him just as he touched her, then let her seduce him the same way, bringing them a level of intimacy together she never imagined possible. For the first time in her life, if only for that moment, she knew J.R. was hers completely.

J.R. smiled. He could still feel Sue Ellen tremble in the aftermath of what had happened between them. Or was it he who trembled? He wasn't sure, they were still so closely tangled together in the sheets.

"Nice to see you smile again," she whispered and kissed his jaw.

J.R. opened his eyes and was instantly drawn into her gaze, her expressive eyes still dark from the intense passion they had just shared.

"Mmmmm," was the only response he could muster as he gave Sue Ellen one of his infamous grins that reignited her already sensitized nerves. He lifted her hand from his chest and lovingly kissed it. "I've missed the way you touch me."

The way his slow, lazy drawl echoed her own thoughts secretly thrilled Sue Ellen. She laced her fingers through his, still needing to be as closely connected to him as possible, then sunk down against his chest and draped her arm and shoulder over him. Nestled so closely against him, his warmth mingled with the faint scent of his aftershave, making her feel like it was the only place she wanted to be.

J.R. smiled once again. The depths of her sensuality never ceased to amaze him. Sue Ellen didn't try to be sexy. Hell, she didn't have to. She just was, with every natural, uninhibited response she gave him. Part of that was because she didn't play the typical female game of reciprocation, waiting for him to say or do something that might please her. She simply knew what she wanted from him and enticed him into gladly giving her everything.

There were so many women he had been with, so many he never cared about pleasing. But not this woman. Finally having her against him again, all he had wanted was to give her the kind of mindless pleasure that left her wanting nothing but his touch. Make her forget her husband. Make her know that she still belonged only to him. Yet she had given him back so much more.

"Wish I could tell you how much your bein' here means to me," J.R. quietly said.

"J.R. Ewing … speechless?" Sue Ellen grinned and kissed his chin again. "I like that."

"That ain't the half of it, honey. You're the best thing that's happened to me in a very long time."

There was no doubt in her mind the comment was sincere. Sue Ellen knew how much he meant it and it touched her deeply. But she couldn't afford to have him be serious. Not tonight.

"Why'd we ever get married, J.R.?" She replied, hoping the comment sounded light. "We're much better suited as lovers."

"Your mamma would have shot me on the spot if I'd taken you to bed without marryin' you."

"Yes, she would have," she giggled.

"Besides, I loved you bein' my wife," he quietly remarked. "I was always so proud to have you on my arm and by my side."

Sue Ellen lifted her head to look at him, a mixture of disbelief and humor in her expression.

"Then why did you say my only attraction to you was the Ewing name and money?" She hoped once again that humor would keep the mood between them casual.

"Well, what the hell did I know," J.R. grinned. Sue Ellen thought her ploy had worked but when he focused his attention back on her, the quicksilver intensity of his eyes stole her breath. "When I finally figured you out," he said, his voice dropping into a low, seductive timbre, "found all that passion lyin' just below your surface … damn. We are so good together."

Sue Ellen looked down, the amusement now gone from her expression.

"There are times I wish that would've been enough, for both of us," she quietly said. "It's why the thought of you with other women used to bother me so much. Thinking you shared with them what we share …"

Her voice trailed off, leaving J.R. momentarily stunned. No wonder his casual dalliances had devastated her, driving her back to the bottle time and again. Why hadn't he seen the connection before?

"Sue Ellen, it was never this way with anyone else. Never." The seriousness of his tone made Sue Ellen look back at him. "When I'm with you, darlin', nothin' else matters. All I can think about is bein' part of you every way possible. And I love the way you want me, just for me, with no schemes or deals attached." He paused for a moment then smiled. "But it's so much more than that. I can't get away with a damn thing around you. And even after all the fights and the bickerin' and the nasty tricks, I trust you more than any other person on the face of this planet. I swear to you, I share that with no one else."

"Then why so many women, J.R.? What were you looking for?"

"Hell, I don't know," he sadly replied. "Any excuse I could think of would probably just sound old and worn-out." He looked away from her, his gaze becoming distant as he recollected the past. "I wanted to be a player in the oil business so bad, I did anything to sink a deal 'cause pushin' Ewing Oil to the top was all that used to matter to me. Consequences be damned, whatever the cost." He looked back at her then gently stroked her cheek with the back of his finger. "It ended up costin' me my wife, my son, and the company itself." He shook his head as a dark desolation settled down over him once again. "I can just see Daddy lookin' down on me right now, shakin' his head. He must be so disappointed with me."

The vulnerability J.R. had just revealed surprised Sue Ellen. She had rarely known him to lack self-confidence or regret any decision he had ever made. Combined with the bleakness she had sensed in him since he had arrived in London, it suddenly made being in his bed even more desirable, knowing that he had turned to her, trusted her, needed her like no one else.

"I'm betting wherever Jock is," she gently replied as she ran her fingers over his chest once more, "oil companies and family fortunes and who made what deal doesn't matter. Having a son who idolizes him the way you do is what counts."

J.R. looked at her for a moment, obviously affected by her words even though the sadness didn't leave his eyes. "I hope so, honey. I ain't got much else."

"You've got John Ross. He feels the same way about you."

"John Ross," J.R. wistfully repeated. He looked away, unable to hold her gaze. The threatened custody battle suddenly loomed large between them.

"Don't fight me for him, J.R.," she pleaded, reading his reaction. "Don't put him though a custody battle. I'll send him to you whenever you ask. Just please don't fight me for him."

J.R. looked deep into her eyes. He knew that once again she was placing their son before all else and he never admired her more for it.

"I know the best place for him right now is with you," he softly said. Then he gave her a razor-sharp look, his tone matching it as he continued. "But I'm warnin' you, if Lockwood screws up again ..."

"He won't," she quickly interjected. "Don has been dealt with."

The flash of temper in her eyes and cutting edge of her voice was the only guarantee J.R. needed. He suddenly knew without a doubt she had given Lockwood very little options along with one hell of a reprimand. He had to fight the urge to laugh out loud.

"J.R., promise me you won't let anything keep you from John Ross from now on," Sue Ellen continued. "This last year without you has been so difficult for him. He needs you so much. Please keep him close."

"I will, I promise." He slowly grinned. "His mamma, too."

As soon as the words registered with Sue Ellen, J.R. felt her tense up in his arms and she withdrew.

"No," she warned. "This is just one night. Nothing more. We have no chance of a future together, you know that."

"Maybe … for now," he lazily replied, unaffected by her announcement. "At least until you're free of Lockwood."

"I keep telling you, Don has nothing to do with it," she staunchly replied, knowing he was trying to get around her. "You and I, we can't live together. It only ends up hurting us all and I won't put John Ross through that again."

"Don't tell me you're gonna stay with Lockwood?" He didn't attempt to hide the irritation in his voice.

She hesitated. "I don't know."

J.R. was angry but he carefully considered his options before he spoke. He knew they had reached a crossroads. If he said the wrong thing, he would lose her forever. But if he said the right thing, he might entice her to stay.

"Okay," he finally said.

"Okay?" Sue Ellen was perplexed. She had been expecting a fight or at least a possessive tirade. "Okay what?"

"If you're goin' back to him … I … understand." He nearly choked on the words.

Sue Ellen was momentarily stunned. "J.R., do you feel all right?"

"Oh, I feel fine," he replied, his voice once again deep and seductive, "'cause you're back in my bed and I'll agree to whatever it takes to get you comin' back."

He ran his hand down her bare back to her hips, coaxing an involuntary shudder from her. The allure of both his touch and the proposition made Sue Ellen want to abandon everything so she could make love to him for the rest of her life. Then reason took over again … Don, her life in London, and too much past damage between her and J.R. that prevented anything more than what they shared at that moment.

"This isn't going to happen again, J.R.," she said firmly.

"You mean this is the last time you're gonna share my bed?"

"Yes."

J.R. laughed out loud, unsettling Sue Ellen's already unstable resolution.

"What the hell is so funny?" She angrily glared at him but it didn't deter him as she hoped it would.

"Darlin', who you tryin' to convince, you or me? 'Cause I just ain't buyin' it." His arrogance made her even angrier. She looked away but he slipped his finger under her chin and turned her attention back on him. "The way you came to me tonight, the past few hours," he said, his voice once again irresistibly low and seductive. "Whatever there is between us will never be over."

"It's just sex, J.R," she lied. "If you're getting a little too emotionally involved, that's your problem."

"Emotionally involved?" The slow, sensual way he drawled out the two words rekindled the spark of desire in her that had only just started to cool. "Oh yes, I'm emotionally involved. 'Cause the way it felt when you kissed me … the way you said my name … the way it feels to have you against me right now … it's not just sex, Sue Ellen. You feel the difference. I know you do."

The enticing tone of his voice as he named each item ravaged her resistance and J.R. sensed she was his once again.

"Your eyes have gone so dark," he continued. "And your pulse …" He traced his thumb from the tip of her chin to the hollow of her neck, making her shiver. "Your pulse is racin' like a thoroughbred, honey. Knowin' I can do that to you … well, if you ever wanna claim me again, for a night or forever, you just come and find me."

She slid up against him, letting her mouth hover over his, making him long to feel her mouth on his once again.

"You bastard," she breathed against his lips.

J.R. softly chuckled. Her tone was resigned, not accusatory. Obviously, he had made his point - too well - and that was her acknowledgement.

Sue Ellen kissed him with an achingly slow thoroughness that left them both breathless. The feelings of love she had tried to fight all night suddenly flooded in and nearly overwhelmed her.

"You have turned my world upside down," she softly said. "You blew into London like a Texas tornado, now nothing is quite the same."

"Tell me the truth," J.R. said, his tone now serious. "You happy with Lockwood … livin' in London?"

"I thought I was."

"You gonna tell him about this?"

J.R. watched her closely as she looked away from him without answering. He knew she had sacrificed a great deal to be there with him and never before had he felt so much love for another person. For the one woman who had always held his heart, no matter how ruthlessly he had denied her.

"All my life, I got what I want, when I wanted it," he remarked, a rare sincerity making his voice very sweet. "'Cept when you walked out and left with Lockwood. Then the bad luck just crashed down on me and nothin' went my way." He paused, trying to find the right words. "Dallas wasn't the same without you and John Ross. It was so empty. I'm nothin' without you two."

Sue Ellen was moved by his honesty and J.R. knew it. Hell, the things that were tumbling out of his mouth startled him, too, but it felt good to finally tell her. It was obvious now how difficult the past few years had been without her and he needed her in his life in some way. Even if it meant letting her go back to her husband.

"Bein' with you and our son the past few days has felt so good," he added. "I'll do anything you say, Sue Ellen. I'll play by any rules you set. I'll even let you go back to Lockwood and won't interfere. Just don't push me away again."

That was as close to begging as J.R. Ewing was capable of and Sue Ellen was unsure how to handle it.

"J.R, you've got to understand that what happened between us tonight … it's over once I walk out the door."

"I know, darlin'," he nodded. "I really do. I just don't want you to ever get so far away from me again, even if it means just havin' you as a friend."

"You and me, friends?" She sarcastically asked with a smile.

"God knows I never want you as an enemy again," he grinned. "You're my lucky star. I'm gonna work on keepin' you happy from now on."

Sue Ellen knew that was a simplification meant to charm and flatter her. But she also knew how much he meant it. The sudden need to strengthen the bond between them made her pulse jump. She gave him another slow, deep kiss and J.R. pulled her closer, intensifying their connection.

No other words were needed to know the new agreement between them was settled.


	35. Part 35

LONDON RAIN, Part 35

In a response that was now part of his subconscious, J.R. reached for Sue Ellen as he slept, just as he had done so many nights during the past twenty years whether she was there or not. There had been so many other women in his life - hell, he had even married one of them - but he only considered one lady his wife and not finding her next to him as expected disturbed his sleep.

J.R. opened his eyes and looked around. His bed was indeed empty and the dark, quiet room offered no comfort. Just before he resigned himself to the fact that Sue Ellen had left, he spotted her across the room, standing by the window, deep in thought. He released a sigh, not realizing he had been holding his breath, and silently slipped out from under the covers, grabbing his robe from the foot of the bed.

As he approached her, J.R. slowly grinned. Sue Ellen was wearing his dress shirt from the night before. No piece of lingerie could ever be as sexy as seeing her in his shirt, the shirttails falling against the thighs of her long, graceful legs.

Sue Ellen sensed his approach and turned her head to him just as he slipped his arms around her waist and gently pulled her against him. She smiled and rested her head against his shoulder as he bent down to kiss her neck.

"I'm sorry I woke you," she quietly said.

"I never knew how big and empty my bed was 'til you weren't in it," he softly said against her ear. The low, seductive sound sent a warm pulse of pleasure through her body. "You havin' second thoughts about what happened tonight?"

"Oh, no." She smiled as she ran her fingers along his arm, enjoying the feel of the slick material of his robe. "It was amazing."

"Yes, it was." He grinned both at the memory and that she hadn't denied it. They were silent for several moments before J.R. spoke up again. "You comin' here tonight … spendin' the night," he gently said. "It wasn't easy for you, was it?"

She shook her head and sighed, relieved he understood. J.R. lightly kissed her neck once more and held her a little tighter.

"I sent Don back to New York earlier tonight," she said after a moment. "He's going to kill the deal with the distributor then the negative and cut will be turned over to me. I also made him sign a legal release, relinquishing any further claim to it." She turned her head to him, resting her forehead against his jaw. "It's over, J.R. The film will never see the light of day again. You have my word."

"And what did it cost you?" J.R. quietly asked, deeply bothered by the assumption Lockwood had ended up getting his way, both with the company and Sue Ellen.

"Nothing," she answered quietly, shaking her head. She didn't have the energy to explain what had happened with Don earlier. She wasn't sure she was ready to face it herself. "You're going to have to trust me."

J.R. considered the request and nodded. "That I can do."

"Now … any chance you'll let me buy Lockwood Entertainment back?" She asked with a tired smile, knowing it sounded like the accusation he'd thrown at when she first arrived.

"I'm open to negotiations," he softly chuckled at her subtle coaxing. He wasn't sure he was capable of denying her anything at the moment. "You gonna turn it back over to him?"

"No. I'll retain control of it this time. I think Don would be relieved if he didn't have to deal with the business end of it anymore."

"Then maybe he's not as dumb as I thought 'cause he'd have one bright lady in charge of his company."

"Thank you, J.R.," she said with a satisfied smile. "For everything. I don't know what would have happened with St. James today if you hadn't been in London."

"Don't worry, darlin'. I won't ever be far enough away for things to get that bad again."

The thought of having him so close was comforting, tempting and a little alarming. It was also something she had wondered about since the first day he had shown up in London.

"J.R., tell me honestly. Is that why you left Dallas and moved to Paris?"

"Dallas was too far away from the only two people I give a damn about," J.R. said with a grin. Of course, she knew. He never had been able to fool her.

"Then this trip to London," she said with a smile, pleased she had read him so well. "It wasn't quite as casual as you made it out to be?"

"Well no, it wasn't exactly casual," he chuckled, still amused at how well she could read his motives. "I just needed to check on you and John Ross, see you both with my own eyes."

"Ah." Sue Ellen smiled and nodded at the confirmation of her suspicions. "You know, you could have just called and asked."

"I've picked up the phone about a hundred times to do just that. But I'd always lose my nerve." Trying to cover up what might have been an admission of weakness, he quickly added what he thought was a better excuse. "Your maid scares me to death."

"My maid? Why?" She was clearly amused.

"'Cause the woman doesn't like me! She just loves givin' me bad news." Sue Ellen laughed even as J.R. continued. "Like the time I called and she told me you were on your honeymoon with Lockwood." His tone became serious. "Damn. She sure got her wish that day."

"That's how you found out I married Don?" She asked, her smile fading.

"Yeah. What a nasty surprise that was."

"I thought John Ross would tell you."

"He wasn't speakin' to me at the time. So why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't think you cared."

"Then it was about time I got over here and showed you I do, even if it did take me all this time to work up the courage." They both softly laughed. "To tell you the truth," he lightly added, "I had lost my nerve about goin' to see you and was headin' back to Paris. Then I spotted you at that little café in Harrods. I couldn't believe my eyes at first."

"So that really was a coincidence?"

"It surely was. When I realized it was you, I couldn't breathe for a minute, which was pretty damn funny considerin' all the time I've spent lyin' to myself about how much you don't mean to me." J.R.'s smile faded. "I finally knew comin' to London was a mistake when I came up behind you and you turned around, lookin' scared to death to see me."

"I thought you had tracked me down to take John Ross back."

"But you ended up givin' me that kiss in the rain," he added. "I wanted you right then and there and knew I'd better get outta London before I did somethin' about it. 'Cept then you called me to come over and see John Ross. Do you have any idea how difficult it was, leavin' you that night?"

"I do," she wistfully replied as she gently ran her hand over his arm again. "As unthinkable as it is, if Don hadn't called, I've wondered if I would have asked you to stay."

J.R. tenderly kissed the corner of her eye. The knowledge that she had wanted him as much as he wanted her that night pleased him.

"Did you know where we lived before I told you that night?" She asked.

He nodded. "I've known since the day you left Dallas. Some of my boys have been keepin' an eye on you over here."

"J.R.!" She angrily broke away and spun around to face him. Her fear that he had been spying on her had been confirmed.

"Whoa, now hold on, honey!" J.R. held up his hands in surrender, hoping to quickly disarm her flare of temper. "Don't go gettin' angry on me. It's not what you're thinkin'!"

"Then you tell me what I'm thinking!"

"That I've been spyin' on you, which I haven't. I swear it! The boys that have been checkin' on you, they are just security agents, that's all!" J.R. saw the tension drain out of her and he relaxed. "And it's not a full time thing. It's just, I had no way of knowin' what London was like and wanted to make sure you and John Ross were safe." Sue Ellen still looked skeptical. "Listen to me. You are the mother of the heir to the Ewing Empire and I have too many enemies to count. That makes you vulnerable in ways you could never imagine, especially bein' outside the United States. I won't risk the chance of anything happenin' to either one of you. Never again."

Sue Ellen was startled by the seriousness of his tone. He had examined her world and seen possibilities and threats she could never imagine. The realization was frightening to comprehend, especially because of what had happened with St. James, but it was also comforting to know J.R. had calculated the threats for her and planned for them with the exactness he was famous for. Plus hearing that he had been concerned about their well-being impressed her. For the past few years, he had acted like he didn't give a damn about either one of them, especially John Ross. She should have known better.

"Sue Ellen," his voice was now gentle, almost pleading, "please don't make me call them off. Especially not after what happened with St. James yesterday."

"No, I won't," she softly replied. "That means a lot to me, knowing you're looking out for us."

J.R. sighed, relieved her flare of temper had cooled off. He slid his arms around her and gently pulled her against him once again.

She surrendered to him and echoed his sigh against his chest. The full weight of his explanation came down on her and combined with the exhaustion from such an emotionally charged day and night. The overwhelming need for sleep suddenly engulfed her and she rested her head against his chest, feeling secure once again as his arms supported her.

"Now, how 'bout comin' back to bed," he said as he kissed her forehead. He misunderstood the shiver his comment triggered. "I don't want you gettin' cold."

She nodded and willingly ceded control back to him, actually enjoying the power he held over her for once. Besides, lying next to him was a tempting offer she wouldn't resist tonight. It was where she finally felt secure after days of doubt and uncertainty.


	36. Part 36

LONDON RAIN, Part 36

The early morning sunshine was just beginning to cast shadows across the main room of the suite when Sue Ellen padded in on bare feet, running a towel over her wet hair. The silk of J.R.'s robe softly slid over her legs as she walked, making her smile at the unavoidable association with the man in the other room. She was finding it difficult to think of anything but him.

In the rational light of day, everything that happened last night was supposed to make sense. None of it did. The past few hours had been a revelation. She thought she knew J.R. so well, thought she could predict his every move. He had proven her wrong, over and over again. He had uttered no words of love. Demanded nothing in return. All he did was physically express what he felt for her in a way that left no doubt about his intentions. It had shaken her to her foundation.

Sex couldn't describe it. J.R. was a master of using sex as a weapon, buying and selling it like barrels of oil in exchange for favors and deals. Yet it was so much more than making love, even though they had both allowed one another through the complex emotional barriers that ruled their response to each other. It was a trust, a need that wasn't biological and so much more than emotional. And to her surprise, J.R. had set it all in motion, been the catalyst that sustained it throughout the night.

The pleasure had been intense. His actions decimated all her defenses and coaxed her to levels never even imagined. A passionate mixture of despair, frustrated desire and ultimately love that echoed a need in her she wasn't even aware of.

Explicit memories flooded her mind, making her heart beat faster. The way he had kissed her … the way his long, tapered fingers had enticed such a sweet, aching desire … the way it felt being against him once again with nothing else between them. She sighed. So many feelings and sensations she had denied herself for so long. So much better than she remembered. Nothing like she had experienced with anyone else.

Her thoughts unintentionally jerked back to Don. It was difficult thinking of him, even to the point of sadness. Being unfaithful to him was not what she had intended. But there would be no "morning after" regrets. If that was wrong, so be it. She would accept whatever consequences crashed down on her. The need she and J.R. had satisfied in each other had been too special to deny now and were moments she would treasure always.

She felt warm, flushed by the thoughts of the night before, yet she smiled wickedly as she touched her cheek with the back of her hand. As wonderful as it had felt being the center of his attention, it was a night she knew J.R. wouldn't soon forget it, either. She had made sure of that.

A knock sounded against the door, disrupting the shameless thoughts she wasn't a bit sorry for. Still smiling, feeling very self-satisfied, Sue Ellen placed the towel over her shoulder and crossed the room to the door. She silently vowed to work everything out with Don once she left the hotel, wherever that took them. But until then, she would enjoy whatever time she had left with J.R. However he chose to spend it.

"Good morning, Mrs. Ewing," Marian the butler said, smiling brightly as she pushed in the breakfast cart. "What a nice surprise to have you staying with us again."

"Thank you, Marian." Sue Ellen shyly grinned and unconsciously tightened the robe securely around her, suddenly feeling a little too exposed.

"It's going to be a lovely day today," Marian remarked as she set up the breakfast buffet on the table

It had certainly started out that way, Sue Ellen thought with a grin. "Marian, were you here when my, uh … husband cut his hand?"

Marian straightened up and looked over at her. "Oh yes, madam. I haven't had a fright like that in years. He was passed out when I found him and bleeding something fierce. Looked as if he'd broken that glass with his bare hand, the poor dear."

"Was that the night I left with my son?"

"Why … yes, madam." Marian suddenly became hesitant, startled by the question. She thought the lady would have known what happened. Now she worried she had said too much.

Just as Sue Ellen feared, it was the alcohol again only now she understood why he had been drinking so heavily. He had shared his pain and loneliness with her last night, allowed her to soothe him instead of the bourbon. Realizing that also helped reinforce her decision to stay. Whatever the consequences would be for spending the night with him, she was glad she did.

"Thank you, Marian," Sue Ellen quietly remarked with a smile. "For looking out for him."

Marian looked over at her and grinned, pleased at the compliment. "If you'll permit a personal observation, madam, I've enjoyed being in his service immensely. He's a very charming man."

Sue Ellen softly laughed. "Yes, he is."

Marian quickly finished setting up the breakfast buffet and retreated, wanting to give the couple as much privacy as possible. "If you require anything else, please ring."

Sue Ellen nodded and watched as the butler let herself out. She then turned and surveyed the full breakfast that covered the table. She grinned, knowing J.R. would be thrilled. As she sat down and poured a cup of coffee, she called out to him, "J.R., breakfast is here."

"Good, I'm starvin'!" He replied from the other room.

Sue Ellen giggled at the confirmation, especially because it was the same response she had gotten from John Ross only a few days ago. Like father, like son.

As J.R. entered the room and walked toward the table, he slipped a silver cuff link into the sleeve of his pale blue dress shirt that was complimented by a black and gray striped tie. The colors were an excellent match for the shirt and set off the silver of his eyes and hair. Sue Ellen marveled at her train of thought. It seemed she was back in the habit of admiring him after years of vowing never again.

Finished with the cuff link, J.R. stopped at the table and looked over at her. The mixture of approval and enjoyment in her expression instantly captivated him.

"Damn," his voice dropped to a breathy growl. "How 'bout if we skip breakfast and go back to bed?"

"Thought you were hungry?" Sue Ellen remarked with a sensual half smile.

"I am."

"You'll miss your plane."

"I don't care."

"You promised to get my bag out of the car."

"Did I?"

J.R.'s eyes dropped to survey every inch he could see of her. His robe was wrapped around her and her hair was still wet from the shower. She looked exquisitely fresh and so utterly delicious.

"J.R. Ewing," she warned, trying to suppress another giggle, "don't you even think about it!"

"About what, keepin' you captive in this room 'cause you don't have any clothes to wear?"

"Yes!" She laughed.

He tried to suppress a mischievous grin but failed. "Sorry I wasn't a little more careful with your dress last night."

They exchanged a very intimate look then both started laughing.

"You owe me a new one."

"Yes, I do. You gonna come over to Paris and collect?"

"I just might."

"I sure as hell hope you do," he grinned. "Damn, you looked gorgeous last night. Where were you goin' all dressed up like that?"

"I was on my way to the opera."

"Why did you pack a bag? Were you leavin' Lockwood?"

"I always stay at the Savoy after the opera," she said, deliberately avoiding his question. "Makes for a nice getaway."

"Mmmm." J.R. remembered how much she loved the fine arts. Symphony, theater, museums, opera … she adored them all. Especially opera. He slowly grinned at the recollection of the way she reacted to it. He didn't care for it himself but her response afterward had always made it worth his time. "Don't tell me Lockwood lets you go alone?"

"Don doesn't like opera," Sue Ellen shrugged. "I meet friends at the theatre then spend the rest of the evening by myself at the Savoy. He indulges me."

The man truly was an idiot, J.R. thought. Or perhaps opera was something she only shared with him. That thought was enticing.

"Well, I owe John Ross a big thanks for sendin' you my way last night," J.R. said as he approached her. He bent down and kissed her then kissed her again.

"Sit down," she said with a satisfied smile and pointed to the chair across from her. "I'll pour you some coffee."

Content with being able to just look at her, J.R. went to his chair and sat back to watch. She handed him the cup then busied herself with serving breakfast. She had such an elegant grace that even her most mundane tasks fascinated him. Plus she looked radiant. The faint hint of pink on her cheeks made him feel damn good.

"You look beautiful this morning," he said before taking a sip of coffee.

She had been keenly aware of his penetrating gaze and it had surprisingly unnerved her.

"Don't start," she playfully warned, her blush spreading.

"Start what?" His grin became wickedly enchanting.

"That charm of yours has gotten me into enough trouble the past few days."

He softly chuckled and took another sip of coffee as he continued to watch her. Letting her go this morning was going to be difficult but while she was there, he was going to enjoy every moment.

"By the way," she added, trying to sound serious but the curve at the corner of her mouth betrayed a smile. "Where did you get the pictures of John Ross and me on the nightstand?"

"Oh, those," he said casually, knowing exactly what pictures she was talking about. They were the ones he had taken off Lockwood's desk. "Nice, aren't they?"

"You're going to give them back to me and I'll get you another set."

"The hell I am! Get Lockwood another set."

"J.R. …"

"You just tell him that nitwit maid of yours broke the frame when she was dustin'," he cut in. "'Cause those are mine now. I stole them fair and square."

"Then it's going to cost you." Her voice was a sensual combination of irritation, amusement, and desire that matched the look she gave him.

J.R. suddenly found it difficult to concentrate. "How much?"

"Make me an offer."

"Honey, you keep lookin' at me like that, I'll give you anything you want."

"Well, that was easy," Sue Ellen replied, her low, enchanting laugh exciting him just as much as her flirting did. "What happened to those devious, no-nonsense negotiation skills you are famous for?"

"I know the difference between givin' up and givin' in. You got me beat. Besides, givin' in to you is my pleasure."

Sue Ellen studied him for a moment, enjoying the satisfaction of both his verbal retreat and the way the thought of his pleasure made the nerves in her stomach light up.

As J.R. watched her, he considered what she had just said about negotiations and suddenly devised the plan he had been trying to find for the thin black velvet jewelry box hidden in his back pocket. He knew it was going to take one hell of a negotiation to even bring the contents of the box up to her but he had to try.

"Say, remember our talk last night," he remarked, hoping it sounded spontaneous. "About why I came to London?"

Sue Ellen nodded. "I do."

"Well, there is somethin' else … another reason I'm here. Seems I have somethin' that belongs to you." J.R. withdrew the box and she gave him a quizzical look as he handed it to her. He paused for a moment, watching her reaction. "When I give a gift," he said carefully, "I don't want it returned and I especially don't want it given to someone else."

Beginning to comprehend his meaning, Sue Ellen hesitated before opening the box. She already knew what was inside. The lid creaked open and revealed an antique bracelet made up of diamond X's set in platinum that sparkled brilliantly in the light. It was the first gift J.R. had ever given her. She in turn had given it to Cally the day she married J.R.

"Cally left it on my dresser the day she left Southfork," J.R. continued. "I didn't even know she had it or I would have returned it sooner."

"It wouldn't have done you any good," Sue Ellen angrily replied as she snapped the box shut then swiftly sat it down on the table as if it burned her fingers. It was a painful reminder of why she had escaped to London in the first place … of why she shouldn't be with him now. "I don't want it."

"Sue Ellen, when I bought that bracelet, it wasn't just on a whim. I searched for weeks, tryin' to find somethin' special for you, somethin' just right. And I knew as soon as I saw it, it was what I wanted. I wanted it to show how much you meant to me. I loved you like I loved no other woman." He smiled tenderly at her. "I still do."

She shot him an angry glare then looked away, hoping to hold in the emotions that threatened to break out of her control.

"Damn you, J.R.," she quietly cursed.

J.R. remained silent, angry with himself for having misread her. He had no intention of hurting her, especially not by giving her the bracelet, but now realized he had done just that.

"Sue Ellen, there is somethin' you need to know. Somethin' I should have told you a long time ago …"

"No, please don't say it," Sue Ellen interrupted.

"Darlin' …"

"And don't call me darlin'!"

Not allowing herself to look at him, Sue Ellen's attention remained focused on an invisible object outside the window. Her sudden distance made J.R. desperate to save the situation. Their remaining time together couldn't be spent like this. Then he realized where he needed to be. He went to the side of her chair and knelt down.

Sue Ellen tried to look away from him but he cupped his hand around her cheek and tenderly turned her face back to his, now only inches away.

"Listen to me. My bein' here in London with you, it means everything to me. And it was by choice. There was only one woman I wanted … needed to be with."

"J.R. …" she tried to stop him but he cut her off.

"You've given me one hell of a fight up 'til now," he softly said as he stroked her cheek, "But I won't deny what I feel about you any more. You are the best thing that ever happened to me. You're certainly more than I deserved." He kissed her with a tenderness he only rarely demonstrated then gave her a smile as gentle as the kiss had been. "Now, go ahead and argue with me."

Her breath escaped in a mixture of amusement and heartache. She knew exactly what he meant. Whatever the future held for them, together or more likely apart, she knew they would always be connected and it was pointless to fight or deny it anymore. She slipped her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly.

Relieved her mood had changed, J.R. sighed and stroked her back, soothing them both.

"Destiny keeps pushin' us back together, darlin''," he softly whispered against her ear. "How 'bout if we both stop fightin' it?"

Sue Ellen drew back from him and brushed a tear away from her cheek. "It's not that simple, J.R."

"It is if we take it one step at a time." He reached out and tipped her chin up to meet her gaze then lightly traced his thumb over the corner of her mouth. "That's all I'm askin' for, Sue Ellen. Just keep steppin' towards me, honey … not away."

Sue Ellen studied him. He was being honest. She knew it in her soul. Just as she knew she would never be able to turn from him again. He would always be there. She wanted him there.

"Now, please take the bracelet," he gently pleaded. "If nothin' else, let it be a reminder of the good things between us like right now. 'Cause that's the way I intended it the day I gave it to you." He suddenly grinned. "Hell, it's gotta be worth a small fortune now. At least I've got good taste."

"Damn you," she quietly replied, both frustrated and amused he had charmed his way with her yet again.

"Stop fightin' me, honey."

"No way in hell."

"Nice talk from the mother of my son," he playfully scolded.

Sue Ellen finally laughed, breaking them both away from the heavy emotions. J.R. took the opportunity to reach over and pick up the velvet box. Before she could object, he quickly opened it and removed the bracelet then slipped it around her wrist.

As the clasp caught, he turned her hand over then bent down to place a kiss at the pulse point on the underside of her wrist. It was a spot he knew so well, knew would trigger a response. As if on cue, she slightly gasped as J.R. felt a tremor run through her. He grinned, enchanted once more by the way she reacted to his touch.

He drew closer, needing to kiss her, but the phone rang, jarring them both from the moment. J.R. swore under his breath and Sue Ellen tried to contain a giggle at his frustration. She reached over to where the handset was sitting, where she had left it after ordering breakfast, and handed it to him.

"Hello," he answered after punching the "talk" button, clearly irritated at the interruption. "Yeah, Jacobs. … Wait, slow down, boy! I can barely …" His expression instantly sobered. "Say that again," came his now guarded reply. "All right. You call me just as soon as it's capped."

J.R. terminated the call then looked back at Sue Ellen.

"J.R., what's wrong?" She asked, genuinely concerned.

"That bottomless pit in Saudi Arabia I've been throwin' money down," J.R. replied, unable to keep the awe he felt out of his voice. "It just sprung a three-thousand-barrel-a-day leak."

"You hit."

"I hit big," J.R. replied as a smile slowly spread across his face and he laughed. He wrapped his arms around her again and hugged her tightly. "Damn, it's good to have my lucky star back!"

"Oh come on," she sweetly scoffed. "It's just a coincidence."

He quickly pulled back to look at her again. "The hell it is! That field has been bone dry since the day I was conned into buyin' it. I'm around you a few days and it hits. I can't wait to find out what else is comin' my way."

The amusement in her expression transformed into a playful, smoldering smile. "Then it's about time you had a little luck."

The sensual tone of her voice sent a thrill racing through J.R., igniting a slow burn throughout his body, just as it always had. He loved her voice, had loved it from her first time he heard her speak at the Miss Texas pageant. He heard it in his dreams. It had fueled all the fantasies that had gotten him through the past few years without her. Now, hearing it deepen from the arousal he sparked in her, he knew he had finally beat the losing streak.

"To hell with breakfast," he whispered. "Let's go back to bed."

His earlier request had transformed into a provocative demand, making Sue Ellen grin as she looked down and ran her fingers over his tie. The silk felt wonderfully maddening as she worked it free from the knot. The way she had done a hundred times before. His ties had always both fascinated and aroused her. They were symbolic of bonds that tied him to Ewing Oil. The bonds she had always longed to free him from.

J.R. was spellbound as he watched her free the tie then concentrate on the button of his shirt. He knew she would touch him, couldn't wait until her fingers grazed the skin of his chest. But as the button released, she stopped and looked up at him then brought her mouth to his, heightening the anticipation.

Sue Ellen had forgotten how much fun it could be to tease him up to a fever-pitch and how easy it was to do so. But giving into him was the better reward. Her fingers finally worked inside his shirt and he inhaled sharply at her touch. Her victorious grin at his reaction was quickly lost under the hungry kiss he pulled her into.

Somewhere in the haze of desire they had fallen back into, there came a distant ring. Then another. Sue Ellen reluctantly pulled back realizing the phone was ringing again.

"Damn it!" J.R. cursed, frustrated by her withdrawal. "If that's Jacobs again …" He picked up the phone and barked out the customary greeting, "Hello!" His entire demeanor instantly softened upon hearing the reply on the other end. "Oh hey, John Ross. Good morning!"

Sue Ellen suppressed a laugh and J.R. glared at her.

"You okay, Dad?" John Ross asked.

"Sure, I'm fine, son." J.R. smiled at Sue Ellen even as he focused on her tempting mouth. "Everything is just fine."

"Good, 'cause I was getting worried about you," John Ross replied. "I asked Mom to check on you last night but I never heard back from her."

"Well, I'm sorry I had you worried. And your mamma did come to check on me last night. Thanks for sending her over here."

Sue Ellen gave J.R. a panicked look that quickly morphed into an embarrassed grin. There was no point in trying to conceal anything now.

J.R. listened through an awkward moment of silence from John Ross, followed by the sound of his laughter.

"Mom is there, isn't she?"

"She is," J.R. said, grinning at both his son quickly catching on and Sue Ellen's reaction. "I invited her back for breakfast this morning."

Even though J.R. had covered for her, it was still awkward being caught in her ex-husband's hotel suite by her son. But the awkwardness was soon replaced by the secure feeling of knowing the two men she loved were conspiring to look out for her.


	37. Conclusion

LONDON RAIN, Conclusion

_Come back to me darlin'  
I will make it worth your while  
Come on back to your baby  
I miss your kiss I miss your smile  
Seems to me the peace I search to find  
It ain't gonna be mine until you say you will  
Don't you keep me waiting for that day_

London City Airport was much smaller than Heathrow but just as busy, serving international business travelers with condensed flight schedules on lighter planes while sparing them the time-consuming hassles of the bigger airport. The private jet centre, separate from the commercial airliners, served a more exclusive clientele. In the midst of airport's chaos, the luxurious passengers lounge it offered was an oasis. With the morning commuters already on their way, it was also quiet. Too quiet, J.R. thought.

He impatiently looked down at his watch. What the hell was taking so long? Then he sighed, realizing it wasn't the flight crew's fault. They were doing him a favor by flying him across the English Channel on such short notice. No, it was the quiet that was getting to him ... and the lady across the room.

Sue Ellen was standing by the window, only twenty feet away yet the distance seemed like miles. She hadn't said much since they left the hotel. Neither had he. He wanted desperately to talk to her but didn't know what to say. More importantly, he didn't know how to say it.

They tried to part at the hotel suite as planned but when it came time, Sue Ellen offered to drive him to the airport instead and J.R. gladly accepted, thinking it would give him a little more time to be with her. Yet as soon as they left the hotel, just as he feared, the passionate bond that had sustained them through the night and enchanted them during the morning evaporated.

It wasn't a surprise. Once they were out of the Lanesborough, Sue Ellen was Mrs. Lockwood again. Another man's wife. Her loyalty belonged to him.

J.R. gritted his teeth as an intense pang of jealousy clawed at him. Lockwood wasn't even worthy of her but what really stung was he hadn't been, either. Damn. All those years she was his wife he never even fully appreciated her.

At least this trip to London had given him another opportunity. Just being able to talk to her had been a pleasure let alone the time they spent together last night. Being with her had been a revelation, nothing like he had ever experienced before. Not since the last time she had been in his bed, anyway.

He had always wondered if Sue Ellen knew she had that affect on him, that their encounters always left him shaken, unable to think of anything but her, just like now. Probably not. He didn't dare tell her. In a twisted way, it was the reason he had drifted away from her so many times. Needing someone so much ... it frightened him, mostly because he feared rejection. Not that Sue Ellen had ever rejected him. He had never given her the chance.

J.R. shook his head, disgusted at the thought. "Jackass," he silently muttered to himself.

Why couldn't he tell her? Would it make a difference if he did? What he wouldn't give for the opportunity to trust her to love him now, allow her to remove the doubt she wouldn't turn away from him or be disappointed in him like Jock had done so many times. He had spent his whole life trying to please his father. Had it cost him the one woman he ever truly loved?

As if sensing his thoughts, Sue Ellen turned to find him watching her. His thoughtful expression shadowed under the brim of his hat became alert and he gave her a wicked grin as he surveyed her from head to toe, leaving little doubt about what he was thinking. There was a time that look would have made her blush. Now she found it was both flattering and amusing even though it still made her somewhat self-conscious.

"Leave a little something on me, darlin'," she playfully scolded.

"Just takin' a few mental notes about you, honey … to keep me occupied on my trip to Saudi Arabia."

"Do try to behave yourself over there, J.R.," she said as she walked over to him. "Their women are wrapped up for a reason."

J.R. couldn't help but laugh at her warning. "I know. I'm not even gonna look, I promise. Besides, I doubt I'll be able to get you off my mind."

"The feeling is mutual," Sue Ellen replied even as a faint blush tinted her cheeks. They fell into a comfortable silence as they looked at each other, both smiling at the hidden meaning of their exchange. When she finally spoke, she deliberately changed the subject. "That is quite a plane out there."

"Yes, it is," J.R. replied. "Marian did another outstanding job." He thought back on the Lanesborough staff and the warm farewell they had given him. Marian most of all. He was truly going to miss her. She had become indispensable. "It was tough, leavin' Sly back home in Dallas, but Marian surely did some fine work for me here. Bookin' me on that plane was an inspiration, especially since it gave us five extra hours together."

"Which you certainly took advantage of it," she shyly grinned.

"Mmmm, yes I did."

Their continued teasing banter made J.R. smile even as it began to sooth the doubts that had been nagging at him. Sue Ellen didn't seem to be to distancing herself after all. He reached over and carefully took her hand. When she didn't pull away, he laced her fingers through his.

"The past few days have been wonderful, Sue Ellen," he added. "It was one hell of a ride, with Lockwood and that business with St. James, but I love where we ended up."

"Me, too." Sue Ellen was amazed that even after so much time, the intensity of his eyes when he looked at her could still make her heart beat so fast. She looked down and stroked his hand with her thumb. "I just wish I could make some sense out of what I feel about you."

"It's simple, honey … just admit you love me."

She softly laughed. "Nothing is that simple."

"Then let's make it simple. Marry me again."

Love and marriage … two words Sue Ellen had avoided the past few days. They were no longer as foreign as she once thought, though. Was it possible she was falling in love with J.R. again? No, she knew better than that. She couldn't even allow herself to consider it although she was willing to admit her feelings for him had changed for the better.

So many of the things she adored about him had resurfaced the past few days. She had never felt so close to him. Plus the unconditional love he had shown for both her and John Ross had astonished her, once again giving her hope that he wasn't the completely ruthless bastard she thought he was. She was also beginning to realize that it might be possible to move past the terrible things he had done back in Dallas and the things he had pushed her to do. It was obvious they both needed some kind of redemption that would give them a much-needed peaceful coexistence along with their son. Maybe they had finally found it.

"J.R., we've already been through this," she gently reminded him. "I'm married to Don." She slowly smiled, needing to keep the mood of their conversation positive. "Besides, if I had the chance, I would never marry anyone again, especially not you."

"Well, I never wanted a divorce in the first place. Just think … if you hadn't divorced me, we'd be home at Southfork right now."

"No, you would be in the Braddock County Cemetery and I'd be serving a life sentence for killing you."

"Sue Ellen ... come on," he slowly grinned. "You can't deny there is somethin' special between us." He leaned closer to her, his voice dropping to almost a whisper. "You need me just as much as I need you, honey."

She shook her head and softly laughed. "Save your charm, J.R. I'm immune. Besides, it was a hell of a battle to gain my freedom from you. I won't ever give it up again."

He took her hand and kissed it, smiling at the boldness of her statement. "I sure hope not. I'm findin' this self-assured, independent Sue Ellen irresistible."

The look he gave her was purely sexual, electric, making her resolve crumble.

"Thank God you are going back Paris today," she sighed. "Although I wish it was Dallas. The farther away the better."

He gave her another of his most deliciously sinful grins. "Does that mean you're tempted?"

"Yes, damn you!"

"Good!" J.R. laughed, enjoying the excited nervousness his comment had triggered in her.

"Now listen to me," she said, pulling her hand away then pointing her finger at him, placing it against his chest. "You know I'm going to need time to sort all this out. With Don … with you … with everything."

"I know, I know … I promised to behave myself and I will." J.R. was enticed by the knowledge that a future seduction might not be as difficult as he had thought only a few minutes ago. "Besides, you're gonna make the next move."

"Oh, really? And what makes you think I will?"

"Just guessin'. Can't wait to find out if I'm right."

"You are the most irritating, egotistical ..."

"The word is incorrigible," he lightly interjected before she could add to the list. "That's what Mamma always called me."

"She was right!"

J.R. laughed again. How he loved matching wits with this lady. It reminded him of breakfasts at Southfork when the whole family would chime in on discussions and Miss Ellie would referee, always having the last word. Funny how his mother's wisdom had become so important to him lately.

"Say, speakin' of Mamma," he said, "you remember her always telling me home is where your heart lives?"

Sue Ellen nodded. "You always told her it was the dumbest thing you had ever heard."

"Well, come to find out she was right. The past few days with you and John Ross ... you two are home for me." The simple statement visually affected Sue Ellen, just as he hoped it would, especially because it was the truth. "Stayin' in Paris will at least let me be as close to you two as I possibly can without bein' a pain in the ass." She gave him a skeptical look and he continued with a smile. "Don't worry, I'll be avoidin' London. Not sure I can tolerate bein' in the same city as Lockwood, anyhow."

"Well, that's a relief." She tried to sound flip but his comments had honestly touched her while quelling some of her fears about having him so close.

A neat young man in an impeccable flight attendant uniform entered the room and smiled at the couple. "Mr. Ewing, we are ready to board, sir."

J.R. looked at the young man and nodded. "Thank you, I'll be right there." He turned back to Sue Ellen, studying her for a moment, the intensity and earnestness of his expression taking her breath away. "Whatever you do, don't say goodbye to me or I won't be able to get on that plane. This isn't the end of us, Sue Ellen. I'm not gonna let it be."

Her expression fell to sadness. "J.R., I can't be what you want me to be."

"You just keep bein' the one lady who stands out from the rest. The one I never quite got over and who broke my heart in a million pieces. I'd gladly give to you all over again." They both smiled at the silly over-simplicity of the statement even though torn by the emotions of their pending separation. J.R. reached over and lightly put his finger under her chin, turning her face towards him. "Vanessa was my first love, Sue Ellen. Not the love of my life. You're the one I love, honey … and always will be."

Sue Ellen was speechless. J.R. rarely verbalized his feelings but when he did, just like now, they were so simple and succinctly worded it made them mean so much more.

The door from the concourse suddenly flew open and John Ross burst in. "Mom! Dad! I'm so glad you're still here!"

"John Ross, what on earth are you doing here?" Sue Ellen asked, both anxious and grateful for the distraction. "How did you get here?"

He smiled sheepishly. "I took a cab. I told the driver to wait so you could pay him."

"That's my boy!" J.R. said with a laugh.

John Ross gave his father a grin then looked over at his mother. "Hope it's okay, Mom. I know I said goodbye to Dad over the phone but I just wanted to see him again before he left."

"Of course it's okay," Sue Ellen said, smiling, unable to argue with his reason. "You made it just in time … your daddy's plane is about to leave."

"Yes, and I better be gettin' on board," J.R. reluctantly added, knowing the longer he stayed the more difficult it would be to leave them. He placed his arms around their shoulders, drawing them closer. "I hope you two have a very Merry Christmas 'cause this trip to London and bein' with you both … it's been the best present I've ever had."

"Me too, Dad," John Ross said. "So glad you came to London."

J.R. looked down at him then put his hand on the boy's neck, stroking the side of his face with his thumb. "Nothin' is ever gonna keep us apart again, John Ross … I promise you. You still comin' to seem me in Paris on New Years Eve?"

"Yes, sir!"

"Good! I sure am lookin' forward to it, son." Then he grinned and added, "and feel free to bring your mamma along with you."

Sue Ellen gently nudged J.R. in the side. He turned to her, still grinning, knowing he had challenged her but bent down to wrap John Ross in his arms before she could protest.

"I'm gonna miss you, boy," he softly said. "Take good care of yourself … and your mamma now. You hear?"

"I will, Daddy … I promise. Think you can call me from Saudi Arabia on Christmas day?"

"You can count on that." J.R. quickly planted a kiss on John Ross' cheek then straightened up. "I'll see you both soon."

"Bye, Dad. See you in Paris."

"Have a good trip, J.R." Sue Ellen added.

J.R. looked over at her again. They both knew there was nothing more to say. He gave her a sweet smile then turned and walked to the door.

It was an odd feeling, Sue Ellen thought, watching him get closer and closer to the door that would lead him to the plane and back to Paris. Back out of their lives. It was what she wanted, the way it had to be. But he was taking everything with him they had shared the past few days, everything that they had rebuilt. Before she knew it, she was following after him.

"J.R.," she softly called out just as he reached the door. He stopped and looked back at her. Several more steps and he was close enough to touch. Reason and duty to Don were gone. It no longer mattered about concealing any kind of physical gestures in front of John Ross. She threw her arms around him and J.R. pulled her tightly against his him.

Neither said anything, simply choosing to enjoy the contact and warmth of each other one last time. After a moment, J.R. pulled back a little, enough to look into the dark eyes he had never been able to forget.

Sue Ellen tilted her head up to him even as J.R. bent down to meet her. Briefly sheltered under the brim of his hat, the gentle kiss beckoned to her, tempted her with promises of future meetings and how much more there could be between them. When it ended and he looked down at her once again, his eyes relayed the same message.

"Whenever you're ready to try out that theory you offered," he whispered, his voice at a tempting pitch, "you come and find me."

A shiver ran through her, further clouding her mind to his meaning. "What theory?"

"That we're better suited as lovers."

Sue Ellen smiled and pulled against him for one last embrace, resting her head between his neck and chest. The spot that was hers, where she fit so perfectly. J.R. closed his eyes, taking in the scent of her hair and perfume. No need for tears or goodbyes. Their destiny was once again running parallel after years of clashing. He couldn't ask for anything more. And for the first time in years, he was happy.

Over her shoulder, J.R. winked at John Ross, who was grinning at the sight of his parents so closely connected once again. John Ross raised his thumb, silently showing his approval and J.R. nearly laughed. He kissed Sue Ellen on the forehead before reluctantly releasing her then turned and went through the door, out to the plane, vowing not to look back.

John Ross went to his mother's side and she put her arm around his shoulder. Together, they watched as J.R. climbed the short retractable ladder that led into the jet. At the hatch, J.R. paused, suddenly torn by the need to leave and desire to stay. He could no longer resist and looked back at the terminal. Were they still there? He received smiles and waves from them both and it was all he needed. He grinned as he returned their waves then entered the plane. As he settled down in his seat, J.R. felt as if a new era was beginning. The Ewings were together again and Europe was going to be theirs.

At least until he could figure out how to get them all back to Dallas and Southfork.


	38. Epilogue

London Rain - Epilogue

Sue Ellen sat down in the chair near the fire, ready to savor the peace and quiet of Christmas Eve. Most of the day had been spent out in the busy city in search of several last-minute gifts. What a nightmare. The impatient shoppers and harassed clerks reminded her of why she usually purchased gifts long before the madness of the final week before Christmas. She silently vowed next year would be different. But this year … well, it had been unavoidable. The past two weeks had been anything but ordinary.

Nothing that had happened was anything she would have ever requested from Santa Claus or Father Christmas, that was for sure. Her seemingly stable marriage had become tenuous at best. She had met one of London's most notorious crime bosses. And to top it all off, her formerly despicable ex-husband reappeared and swept her off her feet. And now she would be spending Christmas without either Don or J.R.

Being apart from both men was the right choice. She didn't doubt that. She needed time to figure out what had happened and where to go next. But having both of them so far away during Christmas and not knowing which one she missed most was a difficult and an unexpected repercussion from all that had happened.

She smiled, though. At least there was one man who was still there. John Ross was hiding out in his room, secretly wrapping presents he thought she didn't know about. And she was looking forward to unwrapping them for him in the morning. Even though John Ross no longer believed in Santa Claus, he still loved Christmas. It was a heritage passed on from his grandmother.

Miss Ellie adored everything about Christmas from decorating the ranch and baking cookies and cakes for the neighbors to taking great pride in personally overseeing the shopping for every family member. Even Teresa and Raul joined in by wearing silly Santa hats that always delighted Miss Ellie and the grandchildren. But Sue Ellen's favorite memories were of Christmas Eve on Southfork, when the Ewings gathered together to exchange one present.

The tradition had started during Jock's wildcatting days. He was usually gone on Christmas Day and didn't want to miss a moment of his family's reactions to the gifts he had purchased for them. So Christmas Eve had became a very special time for the Ewings. Even if it wasn't very apparent the rest of the year, the love they felt for each other was always warmly exchanged that one special night of the year.

A soft knock on the door followed by the doorbell chime brought Sue Ellen back to the present and she was grateful for the distraction. As she stood up to go to the door, the steadfast determination she had relied on the past few years kicked back in. She was in London now and would make the best of it here. Besides, Christmas wasn't about a place, it was the feeling and spirit that mattered. And she knew Miss Ellie would have told her the same thing.

It wasn't long before Sue Ellen was at the door and opened it to a small, smiling army all wearing the furry red and white Americanized version of Santa hats on their head.

"Mrs. Ewing-Lockwood?" Called out the sweet-faced older lady leading the group of several handsome young men, all with their arms full of bags and boxes.

"Marian!" Sue Ellen said with a grin, remembering the night butler who had served J.R. at the Lanesborough Hotel.

"Yes, madam … how kind of you to remember," the older lady sweetly replied with her usual primness. "Forgive our intrusion but we are here on a very special mission." She gestured back to the young men behind her. "Mr. Ewing called from Saudi Arabia and employed us to bring gifts and food for the holiday. May we come in for a moment?"

"Oh, of course! Please come in!" Sue Ellen laughed as she opened the door, somewhat embarrassed at forgetting her manners but also charmed by the very British group before her in Santa hats. What a picture they made. So much like Teresa and Raul.

With the elegant precision they were so well known for, the staff entered and carefully followed directions from the butler. Within moments, the living room was full of beautifully wrapped presents and containers of food that smelled deliciously familiar.

John Ross soon appeared in the hallway and quickly went to his mother's side. "What's going on, Mom?"

Sue Ellen looked down at her son and smiled. "I think your father is trying to give us the closest thing possible to a Southfork Christmas Eve."

"He is indeed, madam," Marian grinned. "Those were his specific instructions. And now that we have carried them out," she signaled to the staff behind her who all turned and left on command, "we shall leave you to your celebration."

Sue Ellen knew the older lady had been compensated very well for her dedication to detail yet the warmth she lent to the task was priceless. It finally occurred to Sue Ellen how much Marian reminded her of Miss Ellie and wondered if J.R. felt the same connection.

"Thank you, Marian," Sue Ellen grinned. "You'll never know how much this means to me … to us." She hugged John Ross across his shoulders.

"Thank you, Mrs. Ewing … that is the best present of all then," Marian grinned. "And have no doubt that is exactly what Mr. Ewing wished to accomplish tonight. Especially with this." Marian then handed her a long white envelope and gift box she had been concealing in her coat pocket. Sue Ellen took both then nodded gratefully to the older lady. "Goodnight, Mrs. Ewing."

"Goodnight, Marian," Sue Ellen replied as she watched the butler and her band of elves exit and approach the waiting van borrowed from the hotel. "Thank you again … and Merry Christmas!"

"And a very Happy Christmas to you and young Mr. Ewing!" Marian replied as she turned back to them and waved then slid into the van. She disappeared as one of her helpers closed the door behind her.

When the van pulled out and drove off, Sue Ellen closed the door and turned back to John Ross who was eyeing the group of presents and boxes with wide-eyed glee.

"Wow, Mom!" John Ross grinned.

"Yeah … wow." Sue Ellen laughed. "Which one would you like to open?"

"All of them!" John Ross exclaimed as he ran to the group of presents.

Sue Ellen laughed. "You know the rules … only one tonight, the rest for tomorrow."

John Ross examined each package and began sorting them out as Sue Ellen opened the containers of food. The food was distinctly southwestern, obviously a special ordered from the Texas Embassy, and the smells once again reminded her of the things about Texas she loved. However, the food would have to wait.

As John Ross eagerly eyed and compared each present, Sue Ellen sat down on the couch and opened the envelope Marian had handed her. Inside were the signed documents that gave her back control of Lockwood Entertainment. Written across the top on a square sticky note in J.R.'s handwriting was, "Merry Christmas, darlin'."

Her attention then shifted to the box. Inside the delicate wrapping was a velvet box firmly guarding a delicate antique crystal perfume bottle with a star cut into the stopper. Her eyes blurred with tears at the meaning.

A star. Such an exquisite choice for the holiday they were celebrating, a symbol of that special state back in America she missed so much, and a gentle reminder of the endearing comment J.R. had made to her that morning after their night together … "it's good to have my lucky star back."

The man could be such a bastard yet there was no longer any doubt about how much he cared for both her and their son. No matter what had happened in the past, no matter where the future would take them even if it included Don, she knew J.R. would somehow find a way to look after them now, especially while they were all so far from home.

_This is the conclusion of "London Rain" but the story will continue as "Paris Lights."_


End file.
